Page 42 of Blue-Eyed Jacks (Destroyers MC: Skilletsville PA #1)

Maine—Kate

Z oe sobbed in Jackson’s arms while I righted my shirt and found my pants. I handed off his shirt and took my turn to hold her.

Jackson slipped the t-shirt over his head and then took her back.

“Bad dream?”

Zoe shook her head and wiped her runny nose on his shirt. He looked at me in panic.

Get used to it. I thought, with only a hint of malice. “What was it?”

“I didn’t dream, but when I woke up, I thought you were gone. I got scared.”

I rubbed her back. She still had a death grip on her father. She was still, in small ways, our little girl. And after the horrible ordeal we’d had, she deserved as much comfort as we could give. Even if I wondered why she wasn’t in my arms instead of his.

Jackson dipped his head. “We’ll never leave you.” He grimaced at his words.

A shot of remorse passed through me. He’d left us before. While I could vow I’d never leave her, he might have to. Although I knew he didn’t speak the lie lightly.

“Nothing would make us leave you.” I tried to bolster my own doubts.

“I’m a murderer.” Her confession was punctuated with a sob.

Jackson frowned. His searching gaze locked with mine. He was looking straight at me when he spoke. “So am I. I killed my first man when I was fifteen.”

Jackson certainly wasn’t the best role model.

But Zoe didn’t need a virtuous man; she needed someone who understood.

He continued. “I wanted to kill Shock. You only beat me to it.”

Zoe’s snort was short. “Do you feel remorse, Dad?” She looked up at him.

“Hell no. And you shouldn’t either. That son of a bitch deserved it. Shock was an asshole.”

They were bonding. I could practically see the threads knitting them together. “Who’s thirsty?”

“Beer?”

I checked the clock by the bed. “It’s eight in the morning.

Water. Tap water. I’m sure we’ve got an empty fridge downstairs.

” Crystal Ann had been taking care of the place, but there were no plans to return.

She’d do what we did for every rental. Clean it out, turn off the fridge, and keep the property in stasis until the family returned.

“Water’s good. Ice cream would be better. What do you say, Zoe? Do you think that shop is open?”

“Not until noon. And if I show up there, they’re going to yell at me for quitting without notice. So, no ice cream.”

“Damn. I had a hankering for some Rocky Road.”

“I’ll give you Rocky Road.” I shook my fist at him in jest.

A knock on the door made us freeze.

Jackson slid out of Zoe’s arms and found his gun. He moved with quiet stealth as he snuck down the stairs. I followed, grabbing the closest thing I could, which was an old bottle decorated with seashells.

The knock sounded again, followed by a female voice. “Hello?”

“That’s Crystal Ann.” Zoe shoved past me and her father and ripped open the door. She greeted her with a hug that latched on.

“Zoe.” Her eyes searched for and landed on me. “Kate, you’re home.” Then she saw Jackson. Her mouth fell open. “What the fuck are you doing here?” Crystal Ann looked like she’d seen a ghost.

“I’m home.”

“The hell you are.”

Jackson rushed to Zoe and covered her ears. “Language.”

Crystal Ann squared off with him, hip cocked, one hand fisted against it. “That’s a load of bullshit from the biggest bullshitter I’ve ever met.”

Instead of getting angry, Jackson laughed. “Goddammit, Crystal Ann, you haven’t changed a bit.”

“Why should I? I’m perfect just as I am. Have you called your mother lately?”

He avoided the question by putting a hand on Zoe’s shoulder. “We were going to go for ice cream. But then Zoe reminded me she’s not welcome there. You’ve lived here a bit; where do you recommend?”

Crystal Ann’s eyes narrowed. “You’re so full of it.” Her gaze drifted across Zoe and me. “But I’m beyond happy that these two are safe. John’s been worried sick, and that ain’t helping his recovery.”

“John’s okay?” Zoe and I said it at the same time.

“Not a hundred percent yet, but he’s home. I was fixing him breakfast and saw the strange car out the kitchen window. Came over to make sure no one was messing with your shit.”

“Can we visit?” Zoe looked to me and Crystal for approval. Crystal nodded.

Zoe hesitated. Then she looked at Jackson.

He stepped forward and held out a hand to guide her outside. “Absolutely. Let’s see if he remembers me.”

Jackson and Zoe left.

Crystal watched their progress until they entered the house next door before turning to ask me. “Who’d he kill?”

It wasn’t like that. “No one.”

She shook her head. “Someone has to be dead. You’re here, and he’s here.”

A few people were dead. But none of them were his fault. I opted for the diplomatic response. “It’s handled.”

“I’m sure it was. But…”

The very last thing I wanted was for her to pry into Shock’s demise. So, I deflected the conversation. “Do you have a problem with Jackson?”

She shook her head slowly. “It’s just… if he’s here, who’s going to be coming after him? Or, when is he leaving you?” She stared me down and tacked on, “Again.”

I didn’t have answers for that. “Can you just be happy for me? For us?”

Her long glance out the window didn’t bode well. “He’s trouble.”

“The best kind.”

Crystal Ann’s eyes widened in surprise. “Who are you?”

“Kate.”

“No. The Kate I know is quiet. She’s a planner. She likes long walks, small towns, and wants nothing to do with trouble. What did you do with that woman?”

“I guess I confronted my ghosts?”

There was worry on my friend’s face. “And those ghosts? Are they truly gone?”

“As much as they can be.” There was a lot to be done before we’d be safe. Things we left behind in Skilletsville, lives affected by the sudden changes. Not just ours.

Zoe’s wasn’t the only job lost, or employer left in the lurch. “Did you replace me yet?”

“I got a bead on a couple of college students looking for income and a place to stay while they do marine study.”

Damn . Someone needed to cover the rent money she’d lose if we stayed.

The winters here were brutal. Even more so when you couldn’t afford the nicer things, like propane for the water heater.

I began revising the work we’d need to do, including chopping wood and heating bathwater on the stove.

I’d done it before Zoe was born. With three of us, we could manage.

“There she is. That’s the Kate I know. Good to have you back. Even if it is only temporary.”

“What do you mean?”

She shook her head. “Jackson isn’t going to stay here. You know that, right?”

Deep in my heart, I did. And if he left, at what point would I go after him?

“You have loved that man since at least a week or three before we met. That ain’t going to change any time soon. I just hope that this time it works out for you.” She glanced outside. “And for Zoe. She’s got him wrapped around her little finger, doesn’t she?”

“Absolutely.”

We joined them over at John’s. Every once in a while, my neighbor’s calculating gaze would drift to me. There was a question there. One we would never tell a person who was in the position John was in.

“And Hank’s retiring,” John said, as he caught us up on the happenings since we left.

Jackson reached over and tapped my arm. “Hear that? The mayor is retiring.”

I shook my head. Only he and I knew his hair-brained plans.

John went on, “They asked me if I wanted to run.”

“You didn’t tell me that,” Crystal Ann said.

“Well, I didn’t know whether you’d get mad at me or not.” His eyes dipped to his lap and the chair encompassing him. “I know you’ve been trying to get me on my feet again. And taking that job is kind of like giving up.”

His jaw worked in silent shame.

Crystal reached for his hand. “I want you happy.” She squeezed.

Jackson frowned. “Do they need a new constable here?”

Oh, dear God . “Like you’d qualify?” I joked.

He shrugged. “Cops, criminals, they think alike.”

John’s knowing gaze shot between Jackson and I. “Speaking of criminals. The scuttle is, there’s a certain biker missing. You wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?” He pointed the question at Jackson.

“I’m here. Hiding in plain sight.”

John’s eyes crinkled at the corners. “I was talking about a different biker.”

Jackson shrugged. “Don’t have a clue, they kicked me out.”

“Dad?” The concern in her voice was clear.

“It’s okay, Zoe. I’m a big boy, I can handle a little rejection.” His mood sobered, and he was distracted for the rest of the conversation while Zoe, Crystal Ann, John, and I caught up.

Zoe’s appetite returned, which gave us an excuse to leave.

That evening I sat on the old picnic table in our backyard, watching the sky darken with Jackson. “You’re quiet.”

“I gotta make a call.”

One that would tear us apart, I was certain of it. “The last time we were in this situation, you stayed a few days.” I reached for his hand and squeezed it so he’d know I wasn’t angry with him.

“I’d stay forever if it was safe. But the longer I put off this call, the less chance there is of that happening. I’m sorry.”

I shook my head. “Don’t be. I like safety. Sometimes that’s more important.” Especially with Zoe.

He frowned. “No, it isn’t. What we have, and what Zoe needs—isn’t that important? Maybe even more important than some fucked up biker rules?” He rubbed his beard and the unshaven stubble around it. “Canada.”

He offered it like a statement, but it really was a question.

“What’s in Canada?”

“More bullshit, less safety net, and maybe some anonymity? I don’t know. But I do know, I don’t want to leave you. I know I can’t leave Zoe. I just can’t.” His inhale and exhale were heavy with frustration. “Tell me what to do.”

“Make the call. Find out where you stand. We’ll figure everything else out after that.”

His throat worked as he swallowed. He pulled out his phone and powered it on.

As it came to life, the notification chimes started. And didn’t let up for a full twenty dings.

He stopped looking at the screen after the fifth bell rang. Instead, he stared at the sky.

I pulled it out of his hand. “Twenty-three messages.”

I swiped to open the list and read off names. “Hickey, Sprout, Wolf, Walt—”

“Jesus. They got Hagerstown calling. I’m fucked.”

The rest of the names didn’t mean much to me except one. “Nonno.”

That deserved a grimace. But Jackson motioned for the phone. “I’m not ready for this. Just so you know.”

“I’m not either. But ready is a relative term. We got this, one way or another. What are they going to do? Come after us? Try to kill us? Been there. Got the gun to prove it. I’m going have to step up my game to match you and Zoe.”

I wasn’t trying to make Jackson smile, but he found humor in them. “You are the most amazing woman I have ever met.”

“That sentiment? Right back at you.”

His grin didn’t fade, at least not until he dialed. Then it did. The night was so quiet, I could hear the whole conversation, not just Jackson’s half.

“Yo, Wolf, what’s up?”

“Big G is here. He flew in. And he’s asking for you.”

Jackson hung his head. I moved closer to rub away the tension building in his shoulders. I whispered very quietly. “We. Together.”

He nodded in agreement with me. “What’s your bead on it? More importantly, what is your wife’s opinion?”

That was answered with a tirade. I smiled, hearing the tone. Wolf wanted to be a bad ass, but even in the short time I knew the couple, I could pin down who really drove that dynamic, and it wasn’t him.

“And she thinks you should listen.” His words trailed off into a resigned silence.

“Tits would make a damn good VP.”

“Fuck you.” Wolf’s response fired back with the ease of habit. But he tacked on, “If she could be. Hate to say this, brother, but you need to come back. I know we had to let you walk out, but man, this place… it fucking needs you.”

“No, it doesn’t. You and Bear need to keep your heads on. I told you that.”

“I’m not a mind-reader, but there is a rumor going around about Shock.”

Jackson met my stare of fear. I couldn’t read his face at all.

Slowly, he asked Wolf, “What is it?”

“Can’t say much over the phone, but it sounds like he betrayed the club.”

Silence. Jackson could tell his man those rumors were true, and he chose to keep silent.

I knew part of that was because he was out.

Once out, you didn’t talk about the club, ever.

Nor did you speak with the members. They turned their backs, ignored your entire existence.

This conversation was significant in its unusual breach of protocol.

I added a quiet kiss to Jackson’s neck. Lending my support and letting him know we were a team.

“Jackson?”

“Can you buy me a day and a half?”

“I don’t think so. Do you need cash for a flight?”

Oh, dear. I was losing him. I shook my head, not ready for this to be over. Not willing to part with him again. I mouthed, “Zoe,” at him, infusing that one word with as much demand as I dared.

The muscles around the edges of his face tensed. He opened and shut his mouth, seeking a response.

“Sprout’s right here; he says he’ll charter a flight. Just give us a location. You have to come back. It’s Big G.”

Jackson took time to answer. When he did, it was short. “Bangor, Maine. Tell Sprout I need a jet waiting at the airport there in two hours.”

“Maine?” Wolf’s question had nuance.

“That’s right. I’m in Maine. With my family .” Jackson stressed the last word and hung up on his former VP.

“We’re going with,” I spoke my decree to the twilight.

“The hell you are. You and Zoe need to take the car to the border. I don’t know how you’ll get across without IDs, but I need you to do it. Get the hell away.” He dug into his jeans for his wallet. He pulled out a stack of money and tried to hand it over. I pushed it back at him.

“I’m not leaving you. And you’re not leaving Zoe. She needs you. Now more than ever.”

Yes, I was playing dirty, but this was my family… our family at stake.

He pleaded with me, “I can’t protect you if I’m dead.”

“Then don’t die.”

He laughed abruptly. His brows twisted with anguish. “Yeah? You don’t either. And keep Zoe close. And no saving any hookers this time. Got it?”

“Got it.” The implications of this sunk in. “We’re doing this.”

“Yeah. I guess we’re doing this.”