Page 57 of Blood Ties (City of Blood #1)

“But she knew...so much. Not just who I am, but vampire secrets. You know, about the bloodline vampires. And she had to know about the binding, since they would have done that.” Slamming my hand down on top of the dresser, I take a deep breath.

I’m spiraling. I can feel the emotions filling me like a tidal wave.

Anxiety and anger lead the charge in my brain.

“I asked her so many times. So many. This is bullshit. Get dressed, we are going over there.”

Walking up the front steps of my childhood home, I can’t help but think it feels tainted and wrong.

I am so different now than I was the last time I was here, but this house is different too.

I walked up these steps three weeks ago, preparing to say goodbye, to let the last remnants of my humanity fall away to spend forever with Bash.

Now, I am changed. I have been bled out and reforged into something better, something stronger. A woman I may not have recognized.

I was always strong but I was jaded, and didn’t truly understand what it was like to live before I was no longer alive.

Taking a steeling breath, I stand up straight, my shoulder blades drawn together—a false sense of bravery sliding over me like a shield—and knock on the door. I hear Grand-mere moving quickly our way, Bash’s hand landing on my back in silent support.

“Elina! Oh my god, my girl.” Grand-mere emerges from the house as quickly as she can, wrapping her thin, frail arms around me and hugging me tightly. I let her hold me, and I hesitantly return the embrace.

Looking at her as she steps back, she looks older, more worn-down than the last time I saw her. Is it, again, because of how long it has been since I saw her, or is it the stress of my disappearance that forced her to age?

“Grand-mere Celeste,” I reply to her coolly. She looks at me, guilt written on her face as plain as day. I love her still, but the betrayal I feel right now is a living creature inside me, one I am not sure how to address.

“Come in, please.” She looks over my shoulder at Bash, her eyes pleading. “Let me explain.” She turns and goes back inside, Bash and I following her across the threshold.

“Grand-mere, it’s time you tell me the whole truth, the real truth this time.” I give her a hard look. “You’ve lied to me long enough.”

“I will tell you everything I know, everything that was told to me. But first, I need to know, are you ok?”

“Yes,” I answer in a clipped tone. I know she’s worried, but I can’t care about her feelings right now. “I’m fine. I’ve been through hell the last few weeks, literal hell. But I am still here, so let’s get to the story. We can talk more after.”

She looks at me with regret, her voice turning sad as she starts her tale.

“Thirty-one years ago, your mother had just turned 25. She had lived her entire life behind these walls, like you have. She was working at the Vampyre Boutique in the quarter and met a man. He was a kind man, compassionate, and a vampire. He begged her to go out with him. Like you, she was skeptical of what he wanted or whether she should go, but she finally relented.” This feels a little too parallel, like we were already on our destined paths.

“He took her out, courted her religiously for weeks before she brought him home to meet me. Over wine and whiskey, we talked, we learned about him. I found out who he was and I was equally horrified and stunned by the revelation.”

“He was so handsome—icy blue eyes, almost identical to yours, but with a more auburn color to his hair. He was olive-skinned and tall, not as tall as Sebastien, but tall enough to tower over your maman. So charming and sophisticated, he won me over instantly. It was hard to not love him. The way he looked at Nora, it was like the sun rose for her, he couldn’t stop looking at her.

The love in his eyes was staggering. And she, of course, loved him all the same.

They told me they wished to be married, to be bound together for all of eternity.

I knew what that would mean, she would become one of his kind.

And she would be Queen one day. So they took the binding oath, out on the balcony of the Hotel Royal while we all watched from the courtyard below, basking in their happiness.

” The mention of the Hotel Royal brings a flood of memories back, Nicolas reducing the place where my parents had their first moments of happiness to something dirty and perverse.

Grand-mere fidgets in her seat, seeming reluctant to tell the remaining story. Picking up my glass of wine, I drink deeply, grateful she offered the drink before we got to the confession part of the evening.

“Go on. You lived an entire life you’ve lied about, don’t stop now.” I know my words are cruel, but the depth of pain I am feeling can’t be expressed any other way.

“They got pregnant almost immediately, something Ezekiel said was a miracle. Vampire pregnancies are not easy to come by,” she says.

Bash nods his head, absently beside me, as though he is lost in the story.

“Once you were born—God, Elina, you were their entire world in a little pink blanket. Ezekiel doted on you like you were the moon hung in the sky. His family embraced us, and watching the joy and wonder in their eyes as you laid in the courtyard, laughing and kicking your feet, transitioning into a laughing, running toddler, wandering around your father’s kingdom, was everything I could have ever wanted.

You loved laying on the rug in the library, holding your dolls, going from shelf to shelf.

As you grew, it was more and more obvious this was your place in the world.

Your mother was deliriously happy, there was never a day where she was not pleased beyond measure.

I would catch her looking wistfully out the windows or watching you play on the floor of your father’s office, a peaceful smile on her face. ”

I am again struck by how Nic perverted that perfect little island of peace my parents enjoyed in their home. Disgusted, I drink down the remaining wine in my glass and pour myself another. Bash lifts an eyebrow at me, I dismiss him and his concern tonight—this is my history, my story.

“When you were three, growing into a gorgeous little curly-haired girl, the Italians flooded the city.” I eye Bash consideringly, knowing this wasn’t his fault, how could he have known?

Would he have cared, if he did? He, at least, looks contrite.

“Ezekiel was killed that day, but you and your mother had fled to this house, where you were sheltered from the fighting, the war. Your mother’s heart shattered right here in this very room as soon as she felt your father’s light go out.

The cry of anguish that escaped her lips, the way she gripped her chest and screamed is something I will never forget as long as I live.

” The tears begin flowing down her cheeks now.

Her voice hitching as she gets closer to the climax of her tale.

“A few nights later, as if going through life in a daze, while you slept peacefully in the little bed upstairs, she was extinguished. I think she –”

“Wait. Wait! Extinguished? Was she…a vampire?”

The look on her face is indecipherable, I can’t figure out if she left that part out on purpose and slipped up, or if she genuinely forgot.

“Oh, um, yes. Near your first birthday, your father turned her. They wanted to be together forever. It was the only way.”

I am stunned speechless by this. It makes sense, why wouldn’t they?

But never, in nearly 30 years of being told the same lie over and over again, had Grand-mere even hinted at the possibility that my mother was a vampire.

The new wave of revulsion over her carefully crafted lies washes over me.

Bash grips my hands tightly, rubbing small circles across my thumb, soothing me slightly.

“The lies never end, I swear.”

“It wasn’t intentional, Elina. She was my daughter, and that is how I think of her, not as a vampire, not as a Queen, as my daughter.”

“Why didn’t you tell me? Why lie?”

The circles on my hand get firmer and more distracting. Sebastien is trying to ground me, keep me from losing my new vampire temper.

“I didn’t want to. You forgot about him.

You were so young. You were so sad. I wanted to make you happy.

I was angry. Every bit of happiness and warmth were sucked from the world.

I wanted to protect you.” She looks at me, so much regret etched in the lines of her face, tears filling her again.

“Please forgive me, don’t take more from me. ”

Shaking my head, I stand. “I need to think about all of this. This was…a lot. Please grand-mere, I need some time. I’m sorry.” I move to leave, bringing Bash with me, by the hands we still have clasped.

“Wait, wait. I have something to give you.” Pulling an envelope from the pocket of her nightdress, she hands it to me. Turning it over and opening it, I withdraw a photograph.

A beautiful woman, green eyes shining and happy, wrapped in the arms of a tall, auburn haired man, on the very balcony I had my first dinner with Nicolas, twinkling lights and all.

She is wearing a flowing white wedding gown, a bouquet of blood red roses clutched in her hand, Ezekiel in his black tuxedo with a matching red rose tucked into his pocket.

Their binding ceremony. Maman’s arm is wrapped in a bandage, the evidence of their blood oath to each other.

The happiness I see shining from them is almost enough to bring me to my knees.

I sob escapes me, causing Bash to wrap his arms around me. Resting his chin atop my head, he whispers, “I’m so sorry, baby. They were so happy. You deserved them. I’m so sorry.”