Page 109 of Blackwood

Her throat bobs as she swallows, then she lifts her eyes to mine, pleading and desperate. “Please trust me,” she whispers. “I have to take this.”

She kisses my cheek and turns on her heel and walks off. I stand there staring after her, fists clenched at my sides. Torn between wanting to follow her and knowing if I do, I might lose my damn mind.

She’s pacing and talking with her hands. Clearly frustrated. Every movement sharp and tense. She runs a hand through her hair like the world is crashing around her and she’s still pretending it’s all under control.

Still the most beautiful thing I’ve ever fucking seen. Still keeping secrets.

Lex jogs up beside me, towel around his neck, hair damp from the shower. “Who’s she talking to?” he asks, drying off his face.

I don’t take my eyes off her. “We’re about to find out.”

We stride over, slow and steady, just in time to hear her hiss into the phone, “That’s fine. Just bring me a change of clothes. I’ll be at Northvale.”

My blood runs cold as I stop right behind her. “Bella,” I say quietly. “What the hell is going on?”

She turns around slowly, phone still clutched in one hand, her other hand trembling slightly at her side. Bella looks between us. Eyes wide. Chest rising and falling like she’s running out of air.

“Cade, no,” she says softly, looking at Lex. “Not right now.”

I shake my head. “Bella, there are no secrets in this. It can’t work if there are.”

Lex glances between the two of us, his brows pulling together. “What am I missing here?”

Her eyes flick to his, and I swear I see it, the crack in her armor. The fear. The guilt. The weight of whatever the hell she’s been carrying on her own for way too long.

But I can’t let it go. Not now. Not anymore.

“Bella?” Lex steps closer. His voice is quieter now. Gentler. “Talk to us.”

She closes her eyes for a beat. Like she’s praying for the right words, or praying for us to drop it.

“Sweetheart,” I say, stepping in grabbing her trembling hands in mine. “Just tell us.”

She bites her lip. And I realize that whatever this is, it’s not just a secret. It’s a huge storm about to break.

Chapter 36

BELLA

The Pit – Northvale University

580 Days Since Zeke’s Death

My hands are shaking like a leaf in a thunderstorm.

“Sweetheart,” he says, voice low and soft but unrelenting. “Just tell us.”

No…no… no fucking no.

I can’t do this.

Not here. Not now. Not when Lex is standing two feet away. Not when I just methim. Not when I’m still high off the feeling of his lap under mine and his hand clenched in mine when I raised it in victory.

This isn’t fucking happening. My heartbeat is so loud I can barely hear anything else. My lungs feel like they’ve turned to concrete.

Maybe I should faint. It works in the movies, right? Just full-on Disney princess it. A little sway, an eyelid flutter, and a dramatic collapse into Cade’s arms. Although, Lex would probably catch me first. Shit, maybe that’s not the worst idea I’ve ever had.

If I tell them, everything changes. If I don’t, I could lose them both. Fuck, and I haven’t even had one of them yet.