Page 156 of Bitter Poetry

Her nostrils flare. She snatches her hand away, takes my coffee from the counter, and exits the room with it. I watch her go, bemused, beguiled. Does she realize she’s putting her lips right where mine have been when she takes a sip?

And I need to thank Cherry for finding those pants—they fit her like a glove.

“You may be ahead of me on the hate fucks,” I say to Christian. “But I’m catching up fast.”

He saunters over, refills his coffee cup, and waves the carafe in my direction. I nod. He collects a mug from the cupboard and fills it before handing it to me.

“So,” he says, keeping his voice low. “You find where she stashed them, yeah?”

Them?

A hot tide washes over me. “Not yet.”

He pulls a strip of pills out of his breast pocket and hands them to me.

Sweat breaks out across the surface of my skin. “You just happen to know the ones she takes?” I shove them into the pocket of my sweatpants.

“I’ve poked around her things, so yeah, I know what brand they are. Ettore has a facility that can swap out just about any medication. Replacing birth control with… other things… is more lucrative than you would believe.”

“Please tell me this is safe.”

He frowns. “Safe? Of course it’s safe. The two guys there run a tight ship. They come with a hefty price tag and if word got out we fucked up an order, we wouldn’t be in business for long. He sells most of them to the Russians and they don’t fuck around if you piss them off.”

Okay, I feel better about pills, but now my concern shifts to the customer base.

Cedro had limited dealings with the Russians. If he was on-selling from this facility to them, I was out of the loop. “How long has he been selling to the Russians?”

“I don’t know. Jero mentioned it when I went there with him. Someone had been lifting a few boxes here and there. It took a while before the missing stock was noticed. That was maybe six months ago... I thought about swapping them before but didn’t want to take the chance that Ettore?—”

“Don’t say his fucking name in her context again.”

“Fair point… When I saw the prescription in her purse, I guessed what it was. She has Jessica get them for her. She might have left them in her purse. But she’s used to hiding them from prick face, and I’m thinking she will do the same.”

I nod.

He grins. “I’ll wait for you in Leon’s office… unless you want me to distract her?”

“You can wait in Leon’s office.”

CHAPTER 46

CARMELA

The strain of acting relatively normal is taking its toll. Christian leaves, and Dante goes to his bathroom. He spends an awful long time in there. If I were a nail biter, I’d have nothing left by the time he comes out… whistling.

I’m in the lounge at this point, anxious as hell.

He’s got his suit on, is freshly shaved, and smells like man candy. I’m not going to lie; I definitely want to take a bite.

Nothing in his demeanor suggests he found my birth control. His statement about ownership is still at the forefront of my mind. If he did find them, he would more likely be angry that I felt the need to hide them rather than the fact that I was taking them. The chance of me getting pregnant during my period, while not zero, is still pretty low, but he might presume it’s safe enough for now. However, it’s pretty clear he’s going to expect more of the same, going forward, and I already know I don’t have the necessary restraint to say no.

Worse, I like it more when I say no and he fucks me anyway.

He walks over to me and takes my face firmly in his hand. Little explosions go off in my womb, and I hold my breath. He’sso close that I can see the flecks of gold in his dark brown eyes. “I need to go out. Are you going to be okay?”

“Yes.”

I want him to kiss me.