Page 50 of Beyond the Stix
“Nothing,” I say, then turn quiet.
“Come on. You’re generally not this grumpy. We have about thirty minutes before we get to our destination. Talk to me. You know I hate driving in the dark,” Ben pleads with a pout.
I roll my eyes. His tactics to engage me usually don’t work. But I have too much of Connor in my head this time. While I don’t normally ask for anyone’s opinions or help, especially not Ben’s, talking to him might get me some advice on what I have to do next to get Connor to talk to me. To trust me again.
“I have this guy…” Damn. I’m not sure how to explain everything that happened. “Did you trust me?”
“Oh. Now I understand why you won’t fuck me,” he clips out, before his face turns sullen.
I sigh. “I’m sorry for being an asshole. I just—I like him. He’s different. And I don’t want anything to jeopardize what I have with him.”
Ben darts a wounded look my way before returning his eyes to the road. “I knew one day someone would catch your eye. I just thought it’d be me.”
“Ben.”
“No. I understand. So, you like him that much?”
“Yes.” I don’t want to admit that I have fallen for the band member I’m supposed to be protecting—not without confessing my feelings to Connor first. But that means I’d have to grow a pair of balls to open up to Connor and tell him about how I feel.
“Which one is it? I know it’s not Raven, the lead singer,” Ben says with a nonchalant attitude. “Tobias snatched that one up last year.”
“How do you know?”
“Please. I heard all about it. I know my friend and his taste. And he’s head over heels in love with Danny. But you? I can’t decide if it’s the bassist, the keyboardist, or the lead guitarist… No,” he chirps. “It’s the drummer. Am I right? Wildman.”
What the hell?
“How did you figure that out?”
“Because he’s your type.”
“I have a type?”
Ben taps a finger to his temples. “I know you, John.”
“Okay? I guess you do.”
“Then my next question is why are you here with me when I know the band is back on the bus we just left in Gerlach?” I meet Ben’s knowing gaze. “You screwed up, Brand. What did you do?”
A groan leaves my lips. “That’s two questions.”
Ben pulls over to the side of the road. “Spill.”
“What are you doing?” I glare at him. “Keep driving.”
“No.” Ben shifts his body and faces me. “I want to help.”
“You do?” I ask cautiously, a little suspicious of his motives.
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“You’re the one who spilled about your feelings for the Wildman. So, tell me.” He folds his arms across his chest and eyes me.
I shake my head, and wonder how I got stuck in this frustrating position. “I looked through his phone,” I confess. I’m not about to bring up Jessup.
“You done fucked up big time. Why did you—never mind. What you need to do is grovel. Like a lot.” Ben pulls back onto the road. “It’s the only way to get him back.”