Page 18 of Bewitched & Bewildered (Witches of Starbrook #1)

Chapter 18

Juniper

It felt natural to collapse in his bed the evening before, but when the sun shines, I realize I’ve overstayed my welcome. It isn’t Ozan who makes me feel this way. He’s still snoozing next to me when I rouse, and he was welcoming the night before.

My back presses to his chest now, with his arm draped over me. His fingers dig into my plush hips, and he mumbles something under his breath.

I need to leave, but the idea of staying is tempting. Our night was the most fun I’ve had in years. It doesn’t matter. I have to go.

There’s enough time to run home and change before work. Opening the shop is supposed to be my responsibility. I can’t get caught up in nights like this, especially not with him, and?—

Of course, my sisters all know. Laurel will ask me about it once I see her, and Maple will congratulate me with a cake. I would rather disappear than face either of them.

The shop should be a pleasant distraction, but it’s not. It’s been empty all morning, and no matter how much marketing Laurel and I do, people don't want to stick around. We have a few hundred followers on social media, but…

It isn’t enough.

I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. It feels like the answer is everything. At this point, what am I doing right ?

The actual issue is that I don’t care. I can’t stop thinking about him. He’s on my mind when I’m sweeping, brewing, and counting cash. It would be in character for Ozan to visit me, but he doesn’t.

Maybe that’s for the best. I need a second to fall apart. I can only let so much pile up before I lose it, and that’s precisely what is happening on this blustery afternoon.

I’m supposed to be alone. This should be a safe place to cry.

“Juniper?” A voice calls through the shop.

It’s Maple. Gods, what is she doing here?

My little sister can’t see me like this. I rush to hide the tissues under the desk and wipe my eyes on the back of my hands.

“In here!” I call.

“Afternoon!” Her shoes click against the wooden floor as she enters. She’s still dressed in her work outfit.

My mood takes another tumble.

Some people have actual problems. Maple is a hard worker. She has an asshole boss and a high-stress job. There’s no way she wants to listen to me whine, even if she’s too nice to say it to my face.

“How was work?” My voice sounds pathetic and broken, even to my ears.

Her smile disappears. She rushes to my side, taking my icy hands in hers. “What happened?”

“Nothing. ”

“Something had to happen.”

I shake my head, pressing my lips together. “It’s nothing.”

“Nuh-uh. I don’t like that answer.” She moves onto her knees to look up at me. “You can’t keep suffering in silence. You’re going to explode like an old potion bottle.”

Gods. She’s right. Even now, I can feel it. There’s a pressure in me longing for escape. I shake from head to toe.

“It’s everything,” I say. “ Everything is wrong.”

“That’s not true.”

“It is. The shop is a failure. My life is a failure.”

“It takes years for a business to come together. You know that.”

On a realistic level, I do know. Convincing myself it’s true is more challenging than simply knowing.

“That’s not the problem.” Fresh tears stream down my face. “I’m not happy here, May. I don’t love running this shop. It feels like any other job—like I’m waiting tables again. I thought I was going to love this.”

“Oh, honey…”

“I should love being my own boss. That’s the problem. I’m not the boss. I’m still being bossed around by… by…”

“By her.”

She’s the only one who understands.

I nod feebly. “I don’t know what to do.”

“That’s okay.”

“It isn’t. It’s not okay anymore.”

“The first step is done. You already know something needs to change. Now, we can decide what and how.”

“But this is Mom’s shop. I can’t start making big changes.”

“No. It’s yours now.” Maple peers into my eyes with sincerity. “Mom gave it to you when she could have sold it or given it to someone else. She could have done anything.”

“There was no time for her to figure it out. She died.”

“That’s not true. You know Mom wanted you to run it.”

“But what if I don’t want to?” I shake my head.

“We’ll figure it out together.” She stands up, and my hands slip out of hers. “Is this all that’s upsetting you? You can tell me anything.”

“No. Nothing happened, but my entire life has descended into the deepest pit of hell. I don’t know how else to explain it.”

“We’ll take care of it all, and we’ll do it together.”

I look down at my boots. “I had sex with Ozan.”

The confession may seem like it’s coming out of nowhere, but it’s another thing adding to the strangeness of my life. I don’t want to like him, but I do. Maple will find out eventually, considering how the town likes to gossip.

She already suspects something after the harvest festival.

“Why are you crying over that, sweetie?” Her eyes narrow. “Did he hurt you?”

“No! No, he was a perfect gentleman.”

“Ah…was he, uh…really bad?” She grimaces.

“Maple! No!” I bark out a laugh. “It was—god, it was amazing. He was good . It was the best night I’ve had in years. No one has ever made me…” I press my lips together, stopping myself from sharing too much information. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

“Nothing is wrong with you. Wrong isn’t the right word.”

I sniffle.

“Do you like him?” she asks.

“No. Never.” My jaw tenses. I’m lying to my sister’s face. “If I ever claim I like that man, there’s probably an… imposter situation.”

“Then don’t let him be one of your problems!” She grins. “You’re allowed to have fun, Juni. Not everything has to be so serious.”

It was more than a fun night to me, but it can’t be for him. He’s freshly divorced. I doubt he’s looking for a serious relationship. I can’t believe I’m a rebound. It’s too embarrassing to say out loud.

“You’re right,” I say. “Forget about it. I just needed to tell someone.”

“I’m glad you told me. You know you can tell me anything.”

“I do.” I stand up and brush off my skirt. “Let’s have a family meeting tonight. We can figure out what to do next.”

“We don’t need to rush into it.”

“I need to,” I say. “I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing. Maybe this will help.”

“We can give it a try. Anything to make you feel better.”

We all meet at the shop again, but it doesn’t feel the same this time. The first time we met here, we had something to be excited about. This time, I’m going to disappoint them.

I disappoint everyone.

“What’s up? Why am I here?” Laurel pushes her sunglasses on her head and settles onto the red rug next to Rowan.

I exhale slowly. “We need to change something about the shop. ”

I’m not giving up on it—not yet. That would be the easy way out, and my life has never been about taking the simple path.

I will do everything to make sure this place comes together. I’ll make changes, big or small, until I feel I’m pursuing my dreams.

“We haven’t been open very long,” Rowan says. “A few weeks isn’t enough time to know if our pricing and marketing is working.”

“It isn’t about that,” I say.

Maple pats my knee.

“Then what is it?” Laurel pouts. “I’m still having fun.”

“I’m… not.” I deflate.

My sisters are frowning at me, and I want to make it stop. They shouldn’t look at me with such worry. It’s my job to take care of them .

“What’s wrong?” Rowan moves onto her knees. She looks like she’s going to stand up, as if she can tackle the problem herself.

“I thought running the shop would make me happy,” I say, “but it doesn’t. I don’t know if anything ever will.”

“Something will,” Laurel says. “Do you want my advice?”

“No.” I smile sadly, knowing she’s going to give it anyway.

“You’re trying too hard.” Laurel lifts her head higher. “The tarot reading said you’re supposed to focus on the emotions. Have you tried… having fun?”

As if I know how to do that. I could argue with her about the reading, but I don’t have the energy.

“You’re right.” I shrug. “I can try that.”

But it’s not a solution, and we know it.

The meeting ends, and I’m as confused as I was before.