Page 20 of Bearly in Love

sixteen

MADISON

I fucking hated crying.

Something about it was kind of healing, though. After I got through the initial snot and misery.

I stood there in the shower for ages, acknowledging my emotions with my tears, and slowly wrapped my head around the reality of my situation.

I wasn’t going to have to mate with the alpha.

I wasn’t going to spend my life popping babies out for that bastard.

Though I hadn’t planned on mating with Bo, it did work out in my favor. Because he wasn’t interested in me, I would have a much better life with him than I could’ve had with my ex-fiancé.

The most Bo wanted to do with me was raise our kid together if there was a baby. He wasn’t expecting love. Or even sex.

We could figure out what mating meant for us, independent of anything or anyone else. He wouldn’t try to force me into anything I didn’t want or wasn’t comfortable with.

Mating with Bo to keep myself out of an unwanted bond wasn’t much different than mating with some other random guy for the same reason.

If anything, it was better, because I knew who Bo was and how he would treat me.

We weren’t friends, necessarily, but we’d figured most of our shit out while we were snowed in together. That was going to work in my favor.

I hoped.

Eventually, I got out of the shower and dried off. My hair dripped over my shoulders and down my arms as I stepped out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around me.

I found Bo in the kitchen, scrubbing my countertops with tight shoulders. He didn’t turn around when I stepped out. He probably didn’t know what to say.

Honestly, I didn’t either.

I was the one who lost my shit, so I was going to have to be the one to figure it out.

I grabbed a pair of clean clothes from my closet and pulled the sweatpants and t-shirt on quietly, not bothering with a bra. After I tried to wring some of the water out of my hair, I tied it up in a messy bun, dried the back of my neck, and padded into the kitchen.

Bo was scrubbing the sink, now. The metal was old and discolored by who-knew-what.

I eased myself up onto the countertop beside the basin. “The stains in that thing aren’t coming out.”

He grunted.

I bit my lip.

A moment of tense, awkward silence passed.

Finally, I cleared my throat. “I shouldn’t have freaked out earlier.”

He stopped scrubbing abruptly.

“I was overwhelmed, but I shouldn’t have been a jerk about it,” I added.

“You caught me off guard with the mating thing, but you saved my life when you got me out of that ceremony. I should’ve heard you out without panicking, and I’m sorry I didn’t.

I know you didn’t plan on biting me, and I don’t think all of the blame is on your shoulders. ”

Bo let out a harsh breath. “Of course it is. I’m the one who lost control. I’m the one who fucked up.”

“You had been nipping me there for days, Ambrose, and you told me from the beginning that you wanted to bite me. I knew we were taking a risk. I knew we were getting closer to that ledge. I chose not to bring it up or stop you. You are the one who lost control, but ultimately, I knew I was pushing you toward that. And I deserve at least a little responsibility for it.”

Bo shook his head roughly. “No, you don’t.”

“Yeah, I do. And honestly, that’s beside the point. Because right now, we need to figure out where we go from here.”

He dropped his sponge and finally met my eyes. The look he wore was one I couldn’t read. “I have no idea what to do, Madi. I never thought I’d take a mate. I never considered what a relationship would even look like.”

I gave him a small smile. “I tried not to think about it when I was engaged.”

He grimaced. “I still want to kill that fucker.”

“I’ll cross my fingers that you get to eventually.”

Bo turned to face me a little more, leaning sideways against the cabinets. “We could go to the resort, if you want. Wait for everything to blow over. I probably can’t afford to stay too long, but I have some money saved. We can make it work.”

“Or we could go to your cabin and pretend nothing has changed for a little longer.”

He bobbed his head. “That’s an option too. But we can’t stay in this apartment. This is the first place the alpha will look, and there’s mold.”

“Is that why you’re cleaning it? I’ve never seen the kitchen or baseboards look so shiny.”

His expression grew slightly sheepish. “I figured you’d need to deep clean to get your deposit back.”

“Thanks.”

“I owe you a lot more.”

“You saved me from spending forever with a complete asshole. You don’t owe me anything.”

He scoffed.

So, I changed the subject. “It’s not logical, but I like Cub Lake, and I’d like to be able to live here after everything is settled. I love your cabin, so we could live there for now.”

“You’ll be a lot safer if we find a place to stay in town instead. Near some of the other bears. My cabin is too secluded. I can sell it to one of the older guys in the clan for a lot more than I paid. We can take the money, buy a house, and fix it up if we need to.”

“Assuming we decide to live together.”

“Even if we don’t want to be anything more than friends, I think both of our inner beasts would do better if we lived together,” Bo admitted. “We can stay in separate rooms, if you want.”

“Like we’re roommates instead of mates?”

“Yeah. Roommates who might have a kid together, and don’t fuck anyone but each other.”

I grimaced. “I was thinking about taking the morning after pill. I don’t know if it would work, or if it’s already too late, but I don’t want to have a baby right now.”

“I don’t either. I think it’s worth a try. And without a bond completed through vows, maybe it couldn’t happen anyway.”

“Here’s hoping.” I lifted my crossed fingers.

He chuckled. The sound was quiet, and not anywhere near as free as it had been back when we were snowed in, but it was definitely amusement.

“I’m on board with staying in town. I’m worried about the alpha coming after me, but you’re probably right about being close to the other bears. The skulk was obviously afraid of you guys,” I said.

“We’re terrifying,” Bo agreed.

I snorted, and he gave me a small grin.

“Give me a few minutes and I’ll have the temporary housing situation figured out.”

“Thanks.”

“Thanks for not hating me.”

I rolled my eyes. “I was screwing you yesterday. Seems pretty far from hate.”

“Not necessarily.” Bo pulled a phone from his pocket. It wasn’t his, and I figured one of the other bears had let him borrow it. He stepped out of the apartment, and I looked around.

Moving out sounded like a lot, but in all reality, I didn’t have much.

My favorite clothes were all in the bag I’d left at Bo’s cabin, so it wouldn’t take long to pack the rest. I’d been planning on mating with the alpha, and then I’d been planning on running away, so I’d tried not to collect too much crap.

I figured the more I owned, the more problems I’d have with him about it all.

Plus, everything cost money.

And pretty much all of my money went into the dance studio.

I didn’t have any other suitcases, so I grabbed a few trash bags from under my sink and started filling them with the stuff I wanted to keep.

My bed had come from my childhood room, and my couch had come from the thrift store.

They were the only real pieces of furniture I had, so I wasn’t worried about either of them.

I had all of my clothes packed and was throwing the last few bathroom things in when Bo stepped into the doorway.

I heard him come in and felt his eyes on me before he said anything.

“I’m almost done packing.”

“You’re packing with garbage bags?”

“Not all of us have fancy suitcases to go with our fancy cabins.”

He snorted.

My lips curved slightly as I tied the garbage bag shut. He took it from me when I turned to face him, and stepped back to let me go through the door.

“You already found us a place to stay?” I asked.

“Yeah. Turns out the clan is happy to help you when you may have knocked your new mate up.”

“Go figure.”

“Our ride will be here in an hour. He’s bringing a moving truck for the furniture. We’ll stop at the cabin to pick it up, as well as the rest of my stuff.”

“It’ll probably take an hour to get this place spotless anyway. We can just donate my couch if you want. Yours is a lot nicer.”

Bo eyed the furniture. “Mine smells a lot better, too.”

“Go ahead and rub it in, jackass.”

He grinned, and we got to work.

The friendship thing we had going on back at the cabin set in again as we cleaned together.

We probably did more than we had to, but I was going to use the pictures of how clean everything was to prove to my landlord that I deserved the money back.

I had photos of the crappy shape it had been in when I first moved in, so I was pretty sure it would work in my favor.

Almost exactly an hour later, there was a knock at the door.

I glanced at the clock.

“That’s our ride,” Bo said, crossing the apartment to answer it.

I was wiping out the inside of the fridge. Bo had been in the middle of cleaning the microwave. They were the last two things to get done.

I finished cleaning the last shelf while Bo pulled the door open. When I heard my brother’s voice, my eyebrows shot into my forehead. I jerked backward, and nearly smashed my head against the fridge.

What the hell was Artie doing at my apartment?

Did he have his mate with him?

Was he going to try to talk Bo out of mating with me?

Not that he’d be able to talk Bo out of something that was already set in stone according to the grizzly. Bo had always been a lot more stubborn than Artie was.

I let out a harsh breath and pulled my head out of the fridge, glancing at my brother and the woman holding his hand.

“Hey, Madison.” Artie’s greeting came out awkwardly.

Which was unsurprising, considering we had definitely never been close.

“Hi.” I didn’t aim for super friendly . I just waved with my free hand as I carried my rag the whole two steps over to the sink.