Page 11 of Barn Burner (Love The Game #2)

Brayden

“I still can’t believe you’re boning my teammate.”

“Don’t say it like that,” Jude snipes.

“Like what? It’s true,” I argue.

“It devalues what it actually is. I love him, Brayden. I’m not just boning him. Boning. Fucking weird word. Just say fucking, or banging, or shagging, like a normal English person.”

“Ugh, fine.” I huff, leaning back in the Adirondack chair on Jesse’s back porch.

He’s out on a trail ride this morning. I would have gone with him, but he fucked me so hard in the shower I knew there was no way I would have lasted in the saddle.

Even now, I’m sitting more on my tailbone than my ass cheeks.

I’m not complaining, though, because I don’t think I’ve ever been as happy and content as I am right now.

“Can you just tell me one thing?” I ask in a teasing tone.

“What’s that?”

“What’s he like in—wait, no. I don’t wanna know.”

Jude snorts out a laugh. “You wanna know what he’s like in bed?”

I make a choked noise. “No. Yes. I mean, he’s a fucking grump, Jude. I can’t exactly picture him as a very… giving kinda lover.”

“You picture my boyfriend having sex?”

“No!” I shriek so loud one of the cows grazing in the field lifts their head and lets out a deep moo. “Damn it, now I’ve scared the cow.”

Jude’s laughter filters through the phone, and then it trails off, turning into a soft hum. “I’m only messing with you. All you need to know is he’s everything I never knew I wanted, and I feel like the luckiest person in the world because I get to call him mine.”

Despite the initial shock of finding out my brother has been secretly dating my teammate Cody Clements, I’m so fucking happy for them. Jude deserves everything, and after struggling with injuries and a trade to a new team, hearing him sound so happy makes my heart swell in my chest.

Meeting someone and settling down has never been something I’ve ever really considered for myself.

I’ve been so focused on my career, on being the best hockey player I can be, that I’ve often pushed everything else to the side.

I’ve never had a real relationship. Just casual sex and friends-with-bennies arrangements, but nothing meaningful.

Nothing that makes me want to throw everything I’ve worked so hard all my damn life away for.

Until Jesse.

It’s like spending these last few weeks with him has been the eye-opener I didn’t know I needed.

Hockey is a temporary lover. I know it’s not going to be there forever.

I’ll be lucky if I’m still playing in ten years.

Hockey is the lover I’ll give everything to.

Blood. Sweat. Tears. And in the end, I’ll be left with a body that has aged beyond my years and more money than I’ll know what to do with.

I know I’m not ready to give up hockey yet, but I’m also not ready to give up Jesse, and that thought is like a dagger to the gut.

Glancing over to the lone cow still watching me, I clear my throat and say, “Jude…”

“Yeah?”

I chew on the inside of my cheek, wondering how to word this without causing Jude to worry. “How did you know Cody was the one?”

Jude’s quiet for a beat, and I’m not sure whether he’s surprised by my question or whether he can sense that I need him to be completely honest with me.

“Honestly? I think it was when I realized he was more important to me than football. You know me, Brayden. Nothing has ever even come close to the game I love. But Cody? He’s special. He means everything to me.”

I take in his words, feeling them almost like a physical thing. I’m not in love with Jesse, but it’s something I could see happening.

“Who are they?” he asks softly.

“What?”

“Who is it that’s made you question all this?”

I shift in my seat, reaching down to grab my bottle of water from the floor and take a sip. “His name is Jesse.”

“Jesse? And I’m assuming he’s a cowboy?”

“Yes, but not like in Toy Story 2 , because she was a girl.”

Jude laughs. “You’re a twat.”

I grin to myself, remembering the startled look on Jesse’s face when I said that to him when we first met.

“He runs a ranch with his family. His dad and brother take care of the beef cattle side of it, while Jesse runs trail rides. His other brother, the one who is fixing my car, looks after the riding school, and his mum has a petting farm. They have Highland cows, Jude!”

“Was that where the photo was from that you sent me?”

“Yeah.”

I can hear the smile in Jude’s voice when he says, “That sounds like your kind of heaven, Brayden.”

The back of my eyes burn, and I squeeze them shut.

It is my kind of heaven. This ranch. This life.

This man whom I’ve spent every day with for the last few weeks.

But my dream has also been on the ice. Under the bright arena lights.

The sound of the goal horn and my name being announced over the speakers.

My dream has always been to lift the Stanley Cup and see my name engraved, and I was close to getting that until it all went terribly wrong. I’m determined it will be our year next season.

Selfishly, I want it all. I want Jesse, the ranch, and hockey.

But at what cost? I have no idea.

“Brayden?” Jesse’s voice filters through the house, followed by the sound of his boots against the wooden floor of the hallway.

“In here,” I call out. I’m lying face down on the bed, gazing out of the window at the cows munching on the grass.

After my phone call with Jude, I was overcome with feelings I didn’t know how to deal with.

I’ve been trying to push my inevitable departure date to the back of my mind because I’ve just wanted to live in denial for a little while longer.

But there’s only so long I can bury my head in the sand.

I’ve got some big feelings for Jesse, and I’m also keeping some big secrets from him.

He doesn’t know I live in Calgary, and he doesn’t know I play in the NHL.

And this twisted part of me is worried that if he finds out the truth, he’ll treat me differently.

Just like everyone else does.

He appears at the side of the bed a moment later, those glacier-blue eyes assessing me, almost concerned. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I just felt a bit tired, so I took a nap.”

Frowning, Jesse takes a seat on the edge of the bed. His hand finds my head, carding his fingers through my hair. “Did I hurt you this morning?”

I shake my head and smile. “No, you didn’t.”

“You’d tell me if I did?”

“Yeah, of course I would.”

My response seems to satisfy him, as his answering hum rumbles deep in his chest. His fingertips begin to massage my scalp, and my eyes fall closed within an instant, revelling in the sensation of having his hands on me.

“Do you feel up to going somewhere with me?” he asks so quietly, his voice comes out gravelly.

I open one eye to look at him. “Always. Where are you thinking?”

“Well…” The corner of his mouth hitches up. “I was thinking I’d keep it as a surprise.”

A little over an hour later, we’re on the highway, and I let out an undignified noise when there’s a sign for Canmore.

“Oh!” I point my finger out the window. “I heard it’s really nice there.”

“It is, but it’s the wrong time of year to go,” Jesse says. “It’ll be full of tourists. You won’t be able to appreciate it.”

Leaning back in my seat, I admire the most beautiful, scenic highway route I’ve ever seen. When we continue past the exits for Banff, Moraine Lake, and Lake Louise and start on the Icefields Parkway, I glance over to Jesse and narrow my eyes in suspicion.

“Where are we going?”

“Somewhere equally as beautiful as those lakes we just passed but will be less busy this time of year.” He meets my eyes briefly before focusing back on the road. “It’s not much further. Another thirty minutes or so.”

We’ve been on the road for over two hours when Jesse takes the pull-off and parks his truck in a small parking area.

“Wow,” I whisper, leaning forward to take in the incredible sight before me. The lake is a gorgeous turquoise blue surrounded by glaciers. “It doesn’t look real.”

He turns off the engine and twists in his seat to face me. “Feel up to taking a walk? You can get some better views from the shoreline.”

I flash him my widest grin. “Hell yeah!”

It’s a short walk from where we parked to the lakeside. When we have to move at various points to allow for other people to walk by, Jesse places a protective hand on my hip or the base of my spine. The simple touch sends a rush of heat through my veins.

I end up stopping a few times as we walk, taking in the breathtaking views and trying to capture such beauty with my camera.

And not just the beauty of the lake. I snap candid shots of Jesse as he walks, the strong lines of his shoulders and back, capturing how the brim of his hat and the surrounding pine trees do nothing to dim the colour of his eyes.

The way the corners of his lips quirk in a smile when he catches me taking his photo and how those eyes soften for me.

I can’t be the only one feeling this magnetic pull between us. He might not be a man of many words, but his eyes hold so much expression. I can tell what he’s thinking with just a simple look, and the way he’s been looking at me recently…

I might be foolish, but somehow, I don’t think I’m going to be the only one losing a piece of themselves when the time comes.

“This is Bow Lake,” he announces when we reach the shoreline, and my mouth drops open as I take everything in.

“I know it’s not the most beautiful of the lakes around here, but there’s a nice hike up to the Bow Glacier Falls.

We’re not really equipped to do it today, but we can try and come another day if you want. ”

I tug my bottom lip between my teeth, biting down on the flesh as my eyes begin to sting.

He remembered that this was my plan before my car decided to go up in smoke.

He knew I wanted to be outside. To see nature.

To be able to experience views just like this one.

And the fact he’s taken time out of his day to do this for me says more than he could ever realize.

Stepping forward, I take both of his hands in mine and lean in close enough my face is shielded by the brim of his hat. “Thank you.”

One corner of his mouth twitches in a small smile. “It’s nothin’.”

“No, it isn’t nothing. This is just… This is all…” I trail off, unable to find the words to articulate exactly how I’m feeling, so I give my head a slight shake. “This means a lot to me, Jesse, so thank you.”

He responds by pressing his lips to mine and squeezing my hands. When we pull apart, I let him go to lift my camera. “Can I take a photo of us?”

His eyes bounce between mine for what feels like the longest ten seconds of my life, and then he nods.

We turn our backs to the lake. Jesse steps behind me, looping his arms around my waist and rests the side of his head against mine.

I hold the camera up and smile—really smile—allowing all the happy feelings that are currently powering my being to show through in my expression.

When I’ve taken about a hundred, Jesse steps aside and holds his hand out to me. “Come. There’s something else I want to show you.”