Page 5 of Awakening His Daddy (The Lactin Brotherhood #17)

Chapter 5

Joe

I didn’t get much sleep last night.

I spent the whole night either thinking about how nice it felt to get Izzy home and into bed, or trying to wrap my head around the idea of someone suckling.

It made using my pump so much worse last night.

Stupid cold, noisy thing, and now I have to do it all over again.

I grumble to myself as I get set up and lock my bedroom door. My son already knows too much, and he’s not too embarrassed to come in and have a whole conversation while I’m milking myself like some kind of farm animal.

When he first found out about six years ago, he was off at college, came home to visit unexpectedly, and then played twenty questions about what I was doing.

At first, he thought it was some kind of sex thing, which you’d think would have made him leave.

But not my son. When I finally yelled at him to “get the hell out of my room,” he scolded me for swearing but then he left. Of course, he was waiting for me when I came back out.

So I explained my most embarrassing secret, and he listened like a mature adult. Which was weird because he’s still not a mature adult. He hugged me and told me my secret was safe with him. Then he told me all about how he learned this new thing with his tongue, and I tried to put him in a headlock. Lucky for him, he’s fast.

A few months later, I got an email from a support group that called themselves the Lactin Brotherhood, and I ignored it for weeks. One night my pump broke, and I was so sick of these darn things that I decided to check their website to see if they had any tips. Turns out they have lots of great ideas and resources to help guys like me, and I hate to admit it, but I enjoyed speaking with them, and it was nice not to be alone anymore.

So I joined.

I’ve been to a few meetings in a more private setting, but never out in public, and I never would have if the little traitor hadn’t tricked me.

It wasn’t too bad, though.

I learned something new.

Like boys want to suckle on their Daddies.

Maybe Izzy wanted to suckle a Daddy?

He said he was there to meet a group, and it was private. He seemed kind of embarrassed too, but it could have been anything.

A dance group, a knitting circle, a book club, heck, even a cat fancy party because he loves cats so much.

Besides, what do I care? It’s not like I can give him what he wants.

My traitorous body tells me I can, and I remind my body that we don’t like guys and he’s my son’s best friend.

Even that isn’t enough to get me to stop thinking about the adorable boy who wants me so badly.

What would it be like to have his mouth on me—no, not his, I mean any mouth? It must feel good or the others wouldn’t let the boys do it.

I’ve always hated pumping, it’s just something to get done and move on, and I’ve never let anyone play with my nipples because of the leaking it can cause.

Maybe I might like it.

I try to focus on the rhythmic sucking of the pump, and it doesn’t feel terrible. I imagine the feel of a warm tongue as I take one cup down and gently flick my wet nipple.

A spark flies down my body. I pinch it lightly, rolling it between my fingers like teeth teasing me might, and my dick is getting into this as well. I pinch it harder as milk sprays onto my stomach while I groan in pleasure. When I tug like the pump does and picture a hot mouth closing around me…

“Yeah, suck on Daddy.”

Nope. Izzy is not what I’m pic—Oh heck, that’s good. I take the other cup away and pinch them both now.

“Such a good boy.” He smiles up at me with my nipple in his mouth, and he looks so sweet, innocent. “You make Daddy feel so good.”

My hips buck, and I don’t even care that I’m probably making a huge mess and jerking it to the thought of a man who’s half my age.

The only thing I can think of are the sharp stings going straight to my balls. I tug harder and harder, causing my milk to spill from me, and I need to come.

With one last tug, I let go of my right nipple. My hand is soaked, and I rub my milk all over my dick as I jerk myself and pinch my other nipple hard.

I’m coming almost instantly, and the force of it has my vision blurring as I throw my head back in pleasure. The feel of my milk leaking out of me as my cum drains makes it even more intense.

I lie back with my arms and legs splayed out on my bed and sigh.

Then I look down at the mess I made and realize that I might need to do this on a towel, or better yet, in the shower.

Then the guilt creeps in fast.

I just jerked off to thoughts of my son’s best friend. He’s someone I shouldn’t even be thinking about.

He probably jerks off thinking of you.

Not the point.

Maybe a shower will wash the shame away.

It doesn’t, and even more depressing, I still need to pump after I’m done.

My Daddy jerk-off session is running on repeat through my head. Izzy is a boy, but is he a Little? Would he be grossed out by the fact that I lactate?

“Captain.”

“Huh.”

“Chief told me to report to you.”

“Oh, right.” I direct the officer to her duties for the day, and she heads off.

Jackson and Trent walk back into the station and give me a wave. I’m about to scold them because they are not partners anymore and where the hell did they leave theirs? But they enter a moment later.

“Don’t forget to pick up Wesley from practice,” Trent says.

“Right… Where are you going again?” Jax asks.

Trent rolls his eyes. “The dentist, remember?”

“Oh yeah,” Jackson answers.

“Then we’ll meet with the group for dinner.” Trent now sounds like he’s talking to an idiot, which in his defense, he is.

“Don’t sass me, boy…” Jax’s voice is sharp but trails off down the hallway.

Maybe I should join them for dinner.

I know that a few of the officers have Littles, and while I understand, I don’t really know what that means. I think it’s something that I’d need to see in action before I can truly understand.

“Joe.” Lane stands and shakes my hand. Everyone else freezes and just stares at me.

“Lane. Everyone.” I nod. “I’m familiar with your relationships, so don’t act different because of me.”

“Okay,” the boy on Seb’s lap chirps. “I’m Conner. It’s nice to meet you, sir.” He then turns to Seb. “I have very good manners. Can I have a sucker?”

Seb rolls his eyes but hands Conner a small, unwrapped sucker.

“I’m Wesley.” A pretty ginger boy holds out his hand.

“Nice to meet you both.” Wesley shakes it, and he seems to be in a more adult mindset. I know that Jax and Trent share this guy, but?—

“I have very good manners too. Can I have a sucker?”

Trent pulls one out of his mouth. “Hey.” Wesley puts his hands on his hips. “That’s my sucker.”

Jax grabs the sucker and puts it in his mouth. “Come and get it.” And boy, does he. I’m starting to feel uncomfortable when Lane butts in.

“Jackson, Trent, public place.”

They sigh and stop.

I spend most of the night just watching, and I understand now that being a Little means you get to do whatever you want.

Conner is getting candy and hiding it from his Daddy. Wesley is getting Trent all worked up by wiggling on his lap while he colors. Max has Silas so tied up he didn’t even notice that Max has hidden all of his vegetables under the table.

“Something wrong Joe?” Seb asks me.

“No, I’m just observing.”

“Could you try not to observe so aggressively?” Silas cradles Max. “You’re scaring my boy.”

“Is he scared or worried that I observed what he was doing?”

“What was he doing?” Silas looks at Max.

“Not scared. He seems like a very nice Daddy,” Max tries.

“I don’t know,” Conner says. “He seems too serious. I don’t think he’s a Daddy.”

“I observed you too.”

“He has the makings of one, though.” Conner tries to hide.

“What are you doing that needs observing?” Sebastian asks.

“Nothing. I’m your good boy.”

Sebastian heaves a resigned sigh. “You’ve got more candy than a parade float.”

“And you hid your vegetables again,” Silas says.

“Ha-ha. Busted.” Wesley laughs.

“Oh, really.” Wesley snaps his attention to me. “Don’t think I didn’t observe you wiggling on Papi’s lap.”

“It wasn’t my fault. It was his erection’s fault. I couldn’t get comfortable.”

“We said you couldn’t get off until after dinner. Working us up won’t change that,” Jax says seriously.

“Yeah, right. Like I haven’t busted you guys in the bathroom before,” Lane grumbles.

“Well, we’re working on it.”

“So that’s why you’re here,” Trent says. “You have a special boy in mind and you want to know what being a Daddy is like?”

“No.”

“We’ve heard that before,” Silas teases.

“I’m straight,” I state.

“It’s a spectrum.” Jax shrugs.

“This is boring,” Conner says. “Can we go play some arcade games?”

“Yes, but no claw game. We have enough stuffies as it is,” Jax says.

Conner gasps. “You can never have enough stuffies, Uncle Jax.”

“No claw game,” Trent adds, and the boys run off.

“What have you figured out so far?” Sebastian asks.

“Daddies take care of their boys and the boys get to do whatever they want.”

“No, we set rules and schedules. We make their meals and pick out clothes,” Sebastian tries.

“We give them baths and put them to bed,” Trent adds.

“And give them spankings when they’re naughty.” Jax winks.

“So, boys get to do whatever they want,” I reiterate my earlier point.

“Daddy, I need more money.” Conner climbs into Sebastian’s lap.

“Tell Joe here what being a boy means.”

“It means getting to do whatever you want.”

“You are so getting a spanking tonight,” he warns casually, and Conner smiles at me.

“See, whatever I want.”