Page 16 of At His Wife’s Behest

K ellan placed the last of his belongings into his suitcase and scanned the bedroom, searching for any forgotten items. His gaze landed on the bed they’d shared.

The faint aroma of their shared pleasure lingered amongst the twisted bedding.

He closed his eyes, replaying the events of the previous night before snapping back to attention.

He rolled his suitcases into the hallway and overheard the sounds of Connor packing, as well. Kellan’s flight left as soon as he arrived at the airport. Connor’s left later that night.

I should invite him to share the jet. Spend a few more hours with him before…

Kellan didn’t want to think about what happened after…

when they returned to the real world and their places within it.

Leaving his luggage in the hall, he strode down to Connor’s bedroom.

Connor’s strong back was to him when he peeked in.

Leaning against the frame, he watched for a few seconds, enjoying the fluid movement of Connor’s body.

A body that had done wicked things to his only hours before.

He was caught staring. Connor spun, a stack of clothing in hand.

“Need something?”

“I…” Kellan inhaled, needing a bit of bravado. “I thought maybe… you might want to fly home with me on the jet? It would give us a few more hours.”

Connor held his gaze. “A few more hours before you go back to your old life and forget all about me?”

I could never forget you.

Never.

“I think it might be best we part now. It’ll give us the time to reconcile what happened here before we return.” Connor laid the stack of clothing in his suitcase, turning his back once more.

“What happened here?” Kellan murmured. He knew exactly what Connor meant, but it was easier to play dumb.

Connor spun to face him again. “Don’t act like you don’t know what I mean.”

I know. You were everything I’ve ever wanted.

“Oh, come now. This was just a job for you. Right? You’ve done this a hundred times before.

” As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he wanted to yank them back in.

“I know you said the things you thought I wanted to hear, likely the same things you’ve said to others before me.

But the week is over. You can stop the charade. ”

“Just a job?” Connor growled. He scoffed, shaking his head, the smile on his lips not reaching his eyes. “Lie to yourself all you want, but I know what I felt… and I know you felt it, too.”

He asked for more. He wants you. “I don’t know what I think.”

Connor marched closer, invading Kellan’s personal space. “Stop thinking. What do you feel?”

Kellan held his breath. Connor’s nearness overwhelmed his senses. His fingers itched to reach out and tug the man closer, to get lost in Connor’s embrace.

To remain in the man’s arms for the rest of his life.

“I’m… pleased with the time we spent together. I’ve enjoyed your company.”

Connor searched his face a moment. “Pleased? Nothing more?”

What could Kellan say? No matter what, they couldn’t be together once they returned to Texas. Spilling his guts wouldn’t solve anything. “What more do you want?”

A forced smile spread over Connor’s lips. “I’m so very glad you’re pleased.” He turned away, resuming his packing. “Have a nice flight.”

Come with me. Please. I… Kellan opened his mouth to say the last bit, but there was no point.

He withdrew and headed toward the staircase.

Urging his feet to move when they very much did not want to, Kellan descended, luggage in hand.

After depositing his suitcases in the foyer, he stared at the front door, reluctant to walk through it and leave the villa—or the man lingering upstairs.

A horn sounded outside it. His ride to the airport. After one last glance at the stairs, he opened the door and walked out, his heart breaking as he moved.

From the upstairs window, Connor watched the departing taxi. His gut twisted into knots, leaving him ill. He struggled for air, gasping past the tightness in his chest.

Just another client. Let it go.

He already has.

The taxi disappeared from sight, and Connor walked back to finish his packing, his heart heavy. Instead of packing, he sat on the edge of the bed, lost.

Let it go? Easier said than done.

When Kellan’s jet arrived home, Emma and Abigail waited on the tarmac, standing just outside the same black vehicle that had dropped him off a week ago.

A week? It had felt longer, yet at the same time like the blink of an eye.

As soon as he climbed down the steps, Abigail raced closer and jumped into his arms. He hugged her little body close to him. “I missed these hugs so much!”

“Hugs?” Abigail asked, smiling broadly. “Didn’t you miss me, Daddy?”

“Well, of course.” Kellan glanced at Emma, holding Abigail against one hip. “I appreciate the welcome wagon.”

“I knew it was hard for you to be away from Abby. I figured I’d end your suffering as soon as possible.”

“You’re a gem.”

“Let’s go home,” Abigail yelled. “It’s hot.” She eyed him, swiping the back of her hand over her forehead. “Wanna go swimming when we get home? I can show you what I learned.”

“Sure thing,” Kellan said, walking toward the SUV. Emma entered first, and he helped Abigail inside before sliding in himself.

Once Abigail was in her booster seat between them, Emma looked past her.

He felt her gaze burning into him. He ignored it.

He wasn’t about to share details of his trip in front of their daughter—at least not the more colorful ones.

Plus, he didn’t want to slip up and have Abigail overhear that he’d had a houseguest and ask more questions he couldn’t answer.

If he was honest, Connor had been much more than a houseguest. Not for the first time that day, his mind slipped back to Italy and the man who’d changed him.

Yet I’m going back to being the same old, boring asshole.

Abigail chattered about the best parts of her week, and he forced thoughts of Connor from his mind, focusing on her.

He was more than happy to sit back and listen.

Hearing her tales allowed him some peace.

Once home, he showered and changed into a pair of swim trunks and a tee.

Exhausted, he could only imagine sliding into bed and sleeping for a couple of days, but he’d promised Abigail they’d swim.

Before he could leave his bedroom, Emma sauntered in. “So? How was it?”

“It was nice.” He forced a smile.

She cocked her head to the side, narrowing her eyes. “Did you enjoy yourself?”

“Yeah.”

“Did you enjoy him?”

Kellan smiled involuntarily, but it quickly faded.

“You look miserable.” She moved closer, tipping his face in her direction. “What happened? Did he hurt you?”

“No. Nothing like that.”

Emma frowned. “So, why does your face look like that?”

Kellan opened his mouth, but no words would come out. After a few seconds of silence, he shrugged.

“What is it, Kel?”

Kellan avoided her gaze. “It was… lovely there. I miss Italy.”

Emma snatched his chin and forced him to face her. “Did you fall for him?”

“Absurd,” he balked.

She held his gaze, her eagle eyes taking in too much. “You’re a terrible liar. Did you know that?”

He pulled from her grip. “I’m not lying. He was a nice guy, and we had a nice time… and now it’s back to the real world.”

“I call bullshit,” Emma said. “I know you too well.”

“I don’t know what you think you see, but you’re hallucinating.”

She remained silent, staring at him with a knowing grin.

“What?” he cried.

Emma lifted a brow. Ignoring her, he headed for the door—but she cut him off, standing before it with her hands on her hips and that single eyebrow arched high.

“Fine!” Kellan barked. “I fell for him. I know it was stupid to fall for a guy who was paid to be there, but I’m a stupid idiot and…” He swallowed against the lump in his throat.

“And it felt good to see what your life could be?” She ambled closer, resting a hand on his arm.

“I doubt you fell for this guy in that short a time. You fell in love with an idea. A concept. You liked who you were there, and you don’t want to lose it…

and you don’t have to. There are other men out there, babe. ”

No. There’s not.

“You’ll find Mr. Right one day. Once you decide it’s time. Hopefully that’s sooner than later.” She brushed her hands over his chest. “I love you, and I want to see you happy.”

He made me happy. “You know I can’t. Not now.”

“You can do whatever you want to do. You’re a grown-ass adult.

“If I ruined my father’s Senate campaign, he’d…” Kellan winced, remembering what it was like to cross his father.

“I know how much he hurt you.” Emma moved closer. “I remember putting cream on those slashes.”

Kellan looked away, shamed. She’d seen him at his lowest and a part of him wished she hadn’t.

“All these years later and you’re still that scared little boy, hoping he’ll accept you if you’re good and you do as he says, when we both know that man will always think you’re less than enough.

” Emma moved into his line of vision, capturing his gaze.

“You’re an amazing man. A generous friend.

A loving father. You are enough, Kel. You’re more than enough. ”

Kellan fought a wave of emotion.

“Your father is a black hole who will never be filled.” She brushed his hair back. “Don’t let him steal any more of your happiness.”

“Easier said than done.”

“Maybe it’s time for professional help?”

He glanced at her, wincing.

“A therapist is exactly what you need to recover from your father’s…” She trailed off, as if the word abuse would bring it all back. She needn’t worry. Those memories lay close to the surface at all times. He wore some of them on his fucking skin.

“I don’t want to relive it, Em. I don’t want to feel like a victim.”

“Babe… you relive it every single day of your life. The only way out might be through.”

“Maybe.”

“I’d be willing to do whatever I needed to help you. Join you whenever. Be there after. You know that, right?”