Page 24

Amaia

I made the decision a long time ago to keep who I was Before out of my mind. The girl I once was, carefree and optimistic … she had turned into a monster somehow, somewhere along the way. All in the name of preservation of others. My morality for theirs. The Compound represented everything and more to me but I think what I clung to the most was how much it encapsulated who I once was.

That person was never coming back. It was painful. But now, it was time for me to turn my pain into power. Fuck Ronan and fuck everything he stood for. I would destroy him for trying to take away my home. As the days went on, my path forward became clear. A plan was already in motion and if I played my cards right in this meeting, nothing would stop me from succeeding.

Sunday. A day I used to rest once upon a time. I couldn’t remember the last time I had an entire day to just be still. It’d been months, actually, it was almost May. A few weeks shy of a year.

We crossed by the cliffside where it had all begun. Reina came to me in a hurry, telling me the worst had happened. She wrapped her arm around my shoulder and gave me a squeeze as she herself remembered that horrible fucking day.

“Can we jog?” I asked. Our packs weren’t too heavy.

Alexiares reached for my pack, wanting to give me the freedom to slip away—barely beyond the others’ reach for a few moments. Reina glanced toward Abel who nodded in agreement. They hosted a silent, quick conversation with their eyes, communicating about me I was sure. I needed a distraction.

The urge to spiral and thirst for a drink was strong. Physical challenges, exercise, those things helped. It was at Reina’s recommendation after all. She’d studied up on ways to help me, determined to keep me away from the bottle. I was grateful for her yet concerned. All of her focus lately had been others and none on her own grief.

This was a good group to send outside the walls. We could all use the time away. Truthfully, Abel was best suited expanding his knowledge with Riley at The Compound but I knew he needed this. A low stakes mission to help rebuild his confidence outside the gates. He put on a good show but it was my duty to see through the bullshit, and see through it I did.

He took charge against the few Pansies we came across. I remained quiet. Coaching him could come later. I wanted to see how he would react, what strategies he would utilize while he was in a safe environment. With us here around him, no harm could come to him, at least from Pansies. I’d expected to come across a few the closer we got to where Ronan’s camp had been only two days before. A parting gift from a man I’d marked for death.

It wasn’t a guarantee he’d be gone when we got there but my gut said he would be. Ronan did not want to give me the opportunity to plot against him. Not from such a close distance. His intention on coming here was merely to show me that he could and that there was nothing I could do about it. Make it clear I possessed no control over the situation, our dealings—not to set up permanent housing.

We arrived at the thick stump that had been covered in vines that now lay bare. I brought my hand to it, resting it and searching for any unnatural ridges and edges to the bark. A hidden marking or note, some sort of evidence of invasive greenery, anything that let on that Riley and I hadn’t been hallucinating. There were none.

“You sure this is it?” Reina asked with curiosity.

She sported her old attire. Posing as an emissary the way she had been years ago when Salem was getting settled. Her pleated navy trousers were tucked into the black laced up boots that stopped right above the ankle. The white of her short-sleeved dress-shirt was coated in light dust, kicked up from our run. With the frills and fluffs of it and the soft pink of her lips, it was all too easy to forget the trauma of what she’d been through, almost . The sad blue eyes that matched her pants served a reminder that much had changed though she was the same loving Reina she’d always been at heart.

An uncomfortable chuckle escaped Abel’s lips. “Yeah, maybe she mixed it up with one of the many other trees around here,” he teased.

There were no other trees around us. His humor was forced, a thin veil over something else. His chocolate-brown eyes darted nervously, scanning the horizon as he and Alexiares fell into position, back to back, bracing for what was coming.

“We never actually went over a plan or anything and um, you know how much I enjoy being prepared,” Reina rambled on. “So maybe we can do that now?”

“If I say my only plan was to show up and hope they were waiting to make their move would that freak you out a bit?”

“Uh yeah,” Reina said. “It would freak me out a lot, actually.”

“Chill out. Take a breather. We are the danger, remember that,” Alexiares attempted to soothe her worry.

Something was off. I sensed eyes on us but saw no one but us around. Alexiares’s hand fell to my wrist, and he pulled me and Reina between the two of them. We fell into formation instinctively. No words needed to be exchanged. Seasoned in blitz attacks and bullshit, it would take a lot to catch us unaware at this point. Abel passed Reina his spare Smith he had to force them, whereas Tomoe’s arrived willingly, without effort. It was one of his many gifts, but far from his strongest.

“You okay, kid?” Alexiares asked him, offering him a hand up. ?Abel took it, grasping back onto his weapon with one hand.

“As good as one gets when your mind takes over to do its own thing. Yeah.” He turned to Reina with an intense questioning gaze. “You have a brother?”

“How hard did ya hit your head Abey-Abe?” She gave up her position and turned, checking him over. The palm of her hand reached up to rest against his cheek. She squinted when no diagnosis came immediately to her. “Seth? Remember him? Crazy cowboy that tried to kidnap me and Moe to take us to live with my even crazier father less than two months ago? Deader than dead in the soil?”

“Reina!” I gasped. We shifted instinctively, reforming our circle, each of us now facing inward. The world around us quieted, but an uneasy stillness filled the air. Yeah, we’re all going to need a shit ton of therapy soon. Elie, Reina, Riley, Abel. Who the hell knew what was going on in Tomoe’s head.

“I fell but not that hard. Two of you are nearly identical. About the same height as Alexi, same I’ll kill you stare, but his hair is as dark as yours. Looks like he’s never seen daylight. Like you,” he grinned and slapped her shoulder at the taunt.

She replaced her gentle touch against his cheek with a hard pinch. Her face faded from a concerned scowl to the amused scrunching of her nose right before it fell to one of shock. “What?” Her cheerful voice wavered with a shaky laugh. “That’s … but that’s Hunter. Why are you getting visions about my past? Dreaming of me day and night, ya Abe?”

He shook his head. His face was grave, not playing around anymore. “No. I, um, I don’t think this has happened yet. You had your hair like this—like now. And, yeah, this is about right. You were talking on the coast line, right there.”

Our eyes followed his pointed finger, and we crept closer to the cliffside. We peered over then up at each other. A cold, sharp sensation rippled down my spine. The prickle along my spine tightened, sharper than frostbitten breath in the dark. I reached for my gun. It flew from my hand before I could react, my throwing knives around my holster pulling free in the same motion, sending me stumbling back a step. The others yelped around me, and I knew then that we fucked up.