Page 46 of An Inevitable Marriage

I had a hand and five fingers that worked just fine.

Except for that one time curiosity got the better of me.

Even then, it had only been about scratching an itch. My body had a need, and I took care of it in the exact same way I fed it when my stomach growled.

That was the way it’d been for most of my life.

Some days, the solitude of my life slammed into me at breakneck speed. On those days, I craved more than the lonely existence I’d sentenced myself to. Of course, those feelings were quickly chased by the memory of my parents and the night their marriage had ended.

Which was exactly why I’d ended up phoning the agency instead of going out on a date like a normal fucking person.

Encounters where no emotional connection was required were far better and safer. Plus, there’d never been a woman with the ability to stir anything inside me anyway.

Until the day I’d met Snow.

She’d been running laps inside my mind since the first time I saw her, churning my insides to a mess I hardly recognized. And even though I was smart enough to know this attraction could be dangerous for her, I simply couldn’t help myself whenever she was close.

Even when she wasn’t.

In the space of a breath, memories of the past were shoved aside. My thoughts drifted to my encounter with Snow the previous night. What did she do after she’d shut the door? Did she lie on the bed, spread those pretty legs, and play with herself?

“Fuck.”

With a groan, I shoved the covers off me and swung my legs over the bed. Feet planted on the cool wooden floor, I stared at my erection and shook my head. “Not gonna happen, buddy.”

Make no mistake, I’d been tempted, on a daily basis no less, to rub one out to the thought of my pretty little Snow. Heaven knew my deprived mind had provided me with more than enough material, too.

But I didn’t want to go there.

It wasn’t as much about it feeling wrong but rather because I’d never jerked off to a fantasy. Not once. The honest truth was I was terrified if I crossed that line, it wouldn’t take long for the fantasy not to be enough.

I’d want the real thing.

And what happened once I’d had her in my bed? How long before I turned into the same monster my mom had lived with for so long?

With another curse, I threw my head back and stared at the ceiling. My brain was too busy again, and the only way to calm it would be to work my body to exhaustion.

Snatching the tie from my bedside table, I pulled my hair back and pushed to my feet. After a quick trip to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth, I tugged on my athletic shorts and went to the gym.

But since I clearly had no control over my own body, I took a detour and found myself in front of Snow’s door. Her light was already on. Hands braced on the frame, I glared at the piece of wood keeping her hidden from me.

Why was she up? Did she not sleep well? Was the mattress not to her liking? I’d get her a new one today if that were the case. My brows dipped even more. Was it possible something more sinister caused her sleeplessness?

Did she, too, have demons that kept her up at night, demons who refused to let her soul rest, much less her body?

Tapping my knuckles against her door and finding out would have been so easy. And as much as I wanted to do just that, I knew it was far safer to walk away. That was why I spun on my heel and marched my ass to the gym.

Once there, I skipped the boxing bag and hopped on the treadmill instead. I set it to a grueling speed and ran until my legs ached, and every hit of my feet against the belt sent a new rush of pain to my joints.

I probably would have kept running if my stomach hadn’t informed me of its empty status.

Tossing a towel over my shoulders, I hurried back to the kitchen. I made it two steps inside before I froze.

Snow was already there, and she was… I cocked my head to the side and narrowed my eyes to get a closer look.You’ve got to be shitting me. I almost barked out a laugh. Because the woman who would forever be Snow White inside my head was standing in my kitchen slicing an apple.

A fucking apple.

And since she had no clue I was there, I took the opportunity to shamelessly take my fill.