Page 119 of An Enigma for the Lycan Crown Prince

“Hm,” I hum. She is right. Tobias was very loyal to Elden’s mom, and he seems to have kept that loyalty to Elden. I guess he would be a good option until I find my actual gamma, but I am not sure if I want to force him to stick around for so long.

“So, are you ready for your birthday?” Janice asks.

I grin at her words. “Not beating around the bush, are you?”

Janice blinks before her cheeks flush. “I wasn’t asking about that, Flora!”

“Oh, I am so ready,” I exclaim. “I can’t wait to jump Elden’s bones. He is fine! I saw him naked plenty of times, and-“

“Yeah, thank you,” Janice groans.

“I want him to mark me when I turn eighteen,” I say.

“Really, you are ready?”

I can only smile at her words. “I have been ready for a long time, Janice. We just both need our wolves to be at full strength and to be eighteen to be able to mark each other. But I have known that Elden is my mate for so long that there is no life I can imagine without him.”

“Must be beautiful to love someone so much,” she says quietly.

“What about you?” I ask. “Is there someone you like?”

Janice stays quiet. “I know what you are hinting at. But it has no future.”

“Why not?”

“Because a girl like me is no match for an alpha.”

“Don’t be silly,” I say. “This coming from you out of all? Come on, Janice. What are you truly scared of?”

“I don’t know… that he won’t want me. That we won’t be mates,” she admits. “And his mother is a true fury.”

“We can get rid of his mom,” I say, making her chuckle.

“I don’t think it will be that simple.”

“Okay, so that part will be difficult, but you can still have feelings for him, and he can have feelings for you. If it’s mutual, then you just wait for him to be ready to take over as alpha, and then not give a shit about what his parents say.”

Janice frowns. “We might not be mates.”

“And if you are?”

She sighs. “I am so scared, Flora. His parents are in a whole different league. I don’t know what they would do if they knew he and I would… you know…” Janice takes a deep breath. “But you know what? One step after another!”

There is more I want to say to her. I want to encourage her and tell her I could help her if she wanted, but there is so much finality in her words that I can only respect her wish not to talk about it anymore instead of probing further.

thirty-eight

Changes

*FLORA*

The world keeps moving, and it’s weirding me out. It’s just so hard to wrap my head around the fact that Grandma isn’t here, that I am living in a world without her, and that Dad wanted to return to me, but never made it. Somehow, my life keeps going on, and there are hours when I forget to be sad. I throw myself into my work, so that helps. It also helps that I don’t need to go to school anymore, as my exams are done. I will miss the time I spent with my friends, but I am glad I can focus on other things now.

Sometimes, I pause and wonder how I can even move on, how it’s possible to live my life the way I do, but then I try to remember what Grandma wanted for me and what she alwaystaught me. Elden made sure we send her off the way she deserves it with the whole pack allowed to be present to watch the pyre, and a feast for everyone. She always loved to give more than she took.

Most of the day I spend time with Elden or work. To my surprise I am really starting to enjoy what I am doing. I thought becoming luna would overwhelm me completely, but with Emilia’s help and her years of experience from her old pack, I am learning some neat new tricks. She encourages me to try new things and to follow my ideas, and that failure is part of the process.

Elden’s douchebag dad is a true idiot for the way he treats her. He could have benefited so much from her. It’s mind-boggling how little he cares for anything.