Page 22 of Always There Bayou (The BR Bayou #3)

And that seemed to be why a lot of my relationships never worked.

Like I said a while ago, a lot of my girlfriends were jealous of the relationship Denny and I shared, but it never made sense to me because we were nothing more than friends.

Looking back, I can see all the confusion I caused, not just to them but to Denny, too.

Even though we never dated, I always wanted them to myself. I always wanted to be able to lie in their arms when I got into fights or arguments with my girlfriends. I’d always look to Denny for comfort…fuck, I was a terrible person, wasn’t I?

I glanced down at Denny as they rested their head in my lap, slowly dozing off, and a pang of guilt traveled through me.

They didn’t deserve to be used as some emotional support person that I dump ed all my baggage onto, especially because of how they’ve always felt about me.

I wanted to cry just thinking about how many times I gave them false hope by snuggling into their arms one day and then being back in my girlfriend’s bed the next.

To me, everything we did for a long time was purely platonic, but to them…it was different. I knew it had to hurt, and it was all my fault. My intention wasn’t to hurt them, but because I was being selfish and not truthful to myself, I had done so anyway.

My emotions were all over the place, and I could feel that pressure building up in my chest. I needed some air.

So, I slowly slid from under Denny, replacing my lap with a pillow, and I exited the room.

I made my way out to the warm, enclosed porch and away from everyone else right as the first tear fell.

I could feel myself shaking as I took a seat on one of the cozy porch swings.

“Cory, you are such a dick,” I say to myself, wiping my eyes. “Ugh, and you’re a crybaby. Grow up!”

“Cory, sweetheart, are you okay?”

My head snaps to the right to see Denny’s aunt standing in the doorway. I nodded, swiftly wiping the last of my tears as she came to sit beside me. She didn’t say anything but wrapped me in one of the warmest hugs ever. I could feel a few more tears slip down my cheeks as I sighed into her comfort.

She pulled back after a while and looked at me, concerned. “I was heading to get something out of the pantry when I saw you walking out here. You looked stressed, so I decided to come check on you,” she says. “What’s wrong, love?”

“ Auntie, I’m a terrible person,” I say, shaking my head. “Denny doesn’t deserve me. They deserve so much better than someone who strung them along for years. Fuck, I feel so bad.”

“Honey, look at me,” she says, cupping my face in her soft hands.

She smiles. “Cory, Denny loves you so much. They always have, but they were also never honest about their feelings for you. You cannot keep blaming yourself because it took you a while to realize your feelings. I love my baby, I do, but they’re not the most straightforward when it comes to a lot of things.

They also have a hard time expressing their feelings about what they want, so don’t feel bad. ”

“Yeah, but I feel like I used their affection as a safety net,” I sigh.

“I knew that they’d never turn me down if I wanted to cuddle or lie up under them, but then I’d run back to my girlfriends when we’d make up.

I’m afraid that I broke their heart unintentionally so many times.

Hell, they’ve said as much. We’ve only officially been together for a day, but I’m already feeling like I'm not good enough for them. Shit, I’ve always felt that way.

That’s why it took me so long to admit how I felt.

What if I mess this all up before it even starts?

I don’t know if I could live with myself if Denny wasn’t in my life. ”

“You love them, don’t you?” Auntie asks with a smile, and I nod, more tears falling.

“So fucking much that it hurts to think about disappointing them,” I admit. “I just want them to know that I’m sorry for all the pain that I caused over the years, whether intentional or not. They deserve better, and I’ll do whatever I can to be that better.”

“ I know, Corduroy. Now, stop crying,” I hear, and my head snaps up to see Denny standing at the door with a huge smile. My heart skips a beat. How long had they been standing there?

“Well, I’ll leave you two to it,” Auntie chuckles. She kisses me lightly on the forehead before getting up and patting Denny on the shoulder.

Once she’s back inside, Denny takes her place.

They take my hands in theirs and smile brightly at me.

“Cory, you and I are gonna be alright,” they say softly.

“The past is the past, and I have faith that we are gonna do better from now on. All of our feelings and grievances are out on the table, and now we know what not to do and how we don’t want to make each other feel.

” They pause, and I nod. “I love you to the moon and back fifty times over. It’s you and me forever, baby, okay? ”

“I like the sound of that,” I reply, and they smile, nodding. “I know I’ve said this before, but I’m sorry about the way I treated you.”

“And I accept your apology, but please, let’s just put that in the past,” they say.

“Starting today, everything from before is behind us, and we’re starting with a clean slate.

We’re gonna work on our feelings, you're gonna go back to therapy, and so will I. Are you willing to do whatever it takes to make this work, love?”

“Whatever it takes,” I nod, pulling them in by the chin to kiss their lips softly. “You are my forever, and that will never change.”

“Good, now come on inside so we can eat.”

I nod and let them take my hand and pull me up.

We enter the house, lock the door behind us, and head straight to the bathroom to was h up.

We met our families at the table and enjoyed one of the best meals I’ve had in a long time.

Throughout dinner, Denny and I couldn’t help but make heart eyes at each other.

And when bedtime finally rolled around, we did a bit of rolling around the sheets, if you catch my drift.