Page 20

Sara's POV

As Bowen leads me back to his bedroom my mind is a mess.

I am his mate. Oh goddess, I am his mate! He is in love with me, he said. The very man I vowed to hate turns out to be my mate. Perhaps I knew it all along but was dead on denying it. How do I go on? What do I do?

I am scared. I am scared to love him back yet I am scared to lose him too.

When I thought Isolde declared Trin to be Bowen's luna, my heart was crushed.

The dream I had of Trin and Bowen kissing at the lenkacea fields rushed back into my memory.

Quickly my imagination took me to a scene where Bowen and Trin were consummating their matehood and bearing their pups.

Goddess, I never felt the pang of jealousy like this before.

It was as if I was being robbed! Bowen belonging to someone else was painful that I could hardly breathe and so I massaged my chest.

I was surprised when Bowen expressed how he wanted me as his mate gave me hope.

When it was cleared that I was his mate, I felt overjoyed. But it was fleeting. Accepting Bowen as my mate feels like a betrayal to Abby's memory and a dishonor to the other's who died with her.

Should I reject him?

My wolf whimpered, warning me of the consequences of rejection.

When Bowen shut the door he already have that worried look on his face. It was like he is cognizant of the battle happening in me and how it is tormenting me.

"Here, sit. I know we have a lot to talk about." Bowen offered and I sat beside him on the bed.

"Sara, I am not saying this because you are my mate.

Believe me that this is how I truly feel.

Sara, I have done you, your sister, and your pack a great wrong.

I know me asking for your forgiveness will not bring them back, but I want you to know that I am deeply sorry for what happened.

Your pain haunts me in my waking and sleeping moments.

I am ashamed of what I did. Please, forgive me.

I was a young alpha and a hurting son back then. My decisions were coming from a world of pain and vengeance. But now I know where my vengeance and hate could take me. I am truly sorry. You were right to call me a monster. I have learned my lesson.

But if you let your heart continue to hate me and take revenge by rejecting our bond, aren't you punishing me and the pack as well? Will the cycle of revenge keep on spinning?

I do hope someday you will forgive me. You don't need to forgive me now.

I can't force you or put a timeline to it.

I will wait, Sara. Until then, I will make it right to you.

I promise. I will not hurt you anymore.

I just ask for another chance. How do I make peace with you? " Bowen earnestly pleaded.

"Give me time. You said you'll wait. I'll hold you to that.

You are right about vengeance becoming a cycle.

I myself would like to live a life without hate.

If I reject you now, I will just cause pain against you, the pack members, and myself.

Neither your forgiveness nor my vengeance will bring Abby back. I am finally accepting that.

The moon goddess paired us. There is a good reason for this. I will respect the bond and I will not reject you out of spite.

And so I need space, starting with a separate room form yours. I am not ready to be that close with you yet. I am not ready for marking and mating. I hope you can respect that.

And you asked how you can make peace with me, my answer is simple.

Make available to all pack hospitals the lenkacea flowers.

Make sure the distribution is equitable and the pricing reasonable and affordable for all werewolves.

Punish heavily those who seek to hoard or excessively profit from them.

Punish those who will withhold them to others or use them for blackmailing.

You own the the flowers. You can set policies that will be beneficial to the entire werewolf kingdom.

Your flowers, your rules!" I laid out and asserted.

Bowen smiled. "You have spoken like a true luna, my luna!

Do you know how proud I am of you right now?

In fact you didn't just sound like a luna to Stone Pack alone.

You sounded like a Luna Queen, my love! You have envisioned a werewolf kingdom that is safe from the threats of wolfsbane and moon metal.

You accounted all wolves, making sure all is safe and things are fair.

But you are slightly wrong on one point. " He claimed.

I lifted a brow, impatient for Bowen to explain.

"I do not own the lenkacea flowers. WE, own the lenkacea flowers, Sara.

As my mate, you have equal rights to them.

And because of this, I will let you take charge of them.

I will handle the harvest and safety issues, but you, handle the distribution and pricing.

Then, together we will form the policies that you so mentioned. What say you?" Bowen offered.

"I accept. I will try my best." I responded with a smile. I sighed knowing now, no one will suffer the same fate as Abby.

"That's my brave one!" Bowen beamed. "And with the separate room you requested, much as I will miss you here on this bed and waking up to your delightful scent, I will grant it."

Bowen hesitantly reached for my hand. When he held my hand, Bowen felt relieved that I did not pull away. "Much I would like to taste your lips again, this will do. We'll take it slow, my love."

Somehow my wolf and I doubt that. I have come to know Bowen a little and one thing is observable. He is touchy, affectionately touchy!

Then Bowen turned and his face became tense. I realized he is in mind link with someone.

He puffed a heavy breath and I could already tell something has happened, again!

"Tell me, please." I beseeched.

"The royal pack is under attack! King Adar's distant relatives want to get hold of the throne! He wants us there the soonest." Bowen disclosed.

"Then we'll go. We will help the king and queen! I want to see my grandfather as well." I consented.

"Davos will take over Stone Pack while we're away. We will bring a-fourth of the army with us. Sara, I need you to follow my instructions when it comes to your safety. Please, only with your safety, let me have control, my love, my brave one." Bowen bargained.

"Fine, but you'll have to trust me, too. When I know I can help and still be safe, do not hinder me. You often call me your brave one, then let me be one, when needed. Are we clear?" I counter bargained.

Bowen was amazed at my reasoning. "Alright." He consented.

This time Bowen boldly pulled me closer to kissed my lips. "I love you, Sara, with all my heart. Never forget that."

His words made my heart skip a beat with rapture. However, his words also felt like he was saying goodbye. A sudden fear washed over me.

I grabbed his arm. "Bowen, do not die on me. Promise me." I asked fervently.

Bowen felt joy with my expression of worry. "Someone's concern." He teased.

"Yes, I do not want to lose you, despite everything." I admitted.

"I promise you, my love, you will have me for as long as your patience can handle. I will be cautious in the battle. Nothing and no one can stop me from going home to my beautiful luna." He promised.