Page 50 of Almost Ravaged (Men of Evercrisp Orchard #1)

Chapter forty-one

Sawyer

M ercer and Noah both blink back at me, shocked expressions marring their handsome faces.

They’ve been caught.

Little boys with their hands in the cookie jar.

Though in this instance, the culprits aren’t boys: they’re men. And I might as well be the proverbial jar, because I desperately want their hands all over me.

The end of their argument was heartbreaking, and Mercer’s proposal was intriguing.

I only interjected because I couldn’t listen for another second, getting my hopes up, just for them to be dashed immediately.

Every cell in my body is alight with want. For all of it. For both of them.

Frankly, I didn’t know sharing was an option until two minutes ago, but now that it’s been thrown out there, I can’t think of a single thing I want more.

I hadn’t even considered what I’d do if I had to choose between these men. Hell, it’s only been a handful of days since Mercer and I hooked up, and other than a little teasing, nothing has happened between Noah and me. So why would that even come to mind ?

Now, though, the answer is simple, and it’s staring us all in the face.

I want both of them, in every way they’ll have me.

Noah’s grief will have to be addressed over time. And not just addressed but managed and cared for. Tended to with patience and understanding. Plus, I deserve time to process the information about his loss, to refocus the lens through which I’ve been viewing him.

Knowing he’s a widower makes so much of his hesitation understandable.

I have to trust that Mercer knows his best friend better than I do. He wouldn’t push him if he was shackled too tightly by his grief to consider this, right?

Although if Noah’s wife only died a year and a half ago, where does that put him in the process of healing? Having suffered my own losses, I understand that the wound may still feel tragically fresh. But I also understand that we all cope differently.

Resolutely, I blow out a breath.

I know what I want.

We’re all adults here. They can each choose how to proceed.

“I’m so sorry,” Mercer says. “I didn’t know you were standing there.” He looks me in the eye, his expression one of genuine remorse. “We shouldn’t have been talking about a-any of that,” he stammers, “without discussing it with you first.”

In answer, I step into the weathered barn, past the piles of pumpkins and gourds, and stride forward, my shoulders pulled back and my head held high.

When I get to him, he reaches for my hand.

I allow it, giving it a quick squeeze, and lock eyes with him, silently assuring him that we’re good.

In fact, we’re more than good.

With any luck, we’ll soon be great.

He and I can’t get there on our own, though. We need input from the man with his back against the wall. The one who’s watching me approach with a mix of worry and want, trepidation and desire, behind those beautiful blue eyes and that perpetual semi-scowl.

I step into his space and prop a hand on my hip. “Did you make a decision?”

“I-I mean,” Noah stutters, still so out of sorts. “I didn’t know if—”

I look over my shoulder and lock eyes with Mercer, then smirk and turn back to Noah. “Maybe this will help.” Popped up on my toes, I grab his face and guide it to mine.

He hesitates, searching my eyes.

“Kiss me,” I whisper, my voice shaky and my hands trembling.

Despite how much I want him, and despite how confident I feel, I’m putting it all on the line right now.

Will he? Won’t he?

Does he want this?

Does he want me?

Gently, I scrape my fingers down his jaw, delighting in the prickles of his facial hair beneath my nails.

Instead of leaning closer, he slumps back against the wall.

My heart sinks, but I’m not giving up. Not yet.

I drape my arms around his neck and lace my fingers, forcing him to look at me. Time slows as I silently plead with him to make a move. To follow through. To do something .

“Noah. I want this. I want y—”

He dips forward, his mouth landing on mine.

My brain practically short-circuits.

Noah’s kissing me.

Noah’s lips are pressing against my lips. His massive hand is trailing up my spine. Now it’s cradling the back of my head.

I cling to his frame and open for him, greeting his tongue with a caress of my own.

A choked groan catches in the back of his throat as our mouths fuse together, then pull back in a hot, desperate rhythm.

As he licks into my mouth, his stubble scrapes over my skin and sends shivers dancing up and down my spine.

I try to step back, but Noah tightens his grip and pulls me in until my soft curves meld against his taut muscle and broad frame.

His trepidation has vanished completely, the strokes of his tongue relentless and reverent.

Without my permission, a whimper slips free. After all that hesitation, he’s kissing me like he’s never been so sure about anything in his life .

He clutches the hair at the back of my head and tugs. That simple move causes tingles to erupt all over my body. My nipples strain against the soft fabric of my camisole in a way that sends warmth straight to my core.

Mercer groans behind us, breaking the spell.

Panting, I look back and quickly assess him. I’m well-versed in the balancing act of a three-way, though I’ve never been involved in one that’s developed organically like this. Already, emotions are running high, so a pulse check feels necessary.

Dark, heavy-lidded eyes bore into me. “Hottest fucking thing I’ve ever seen,” he rasps, adjusting himself through his pants.

Floating on his approval, I turn back to Noah. Only to sink back down until my feet are planted on the ground.

The concern from earlier is firmly back in place.

Shit.

I scratch lightly at the short hairs at his nape, eager to make sure he sees just how much I want him and hoping like hell he’s not backing out now. “Last week? In the apiary? I wish you had kissed me like that.”

Color tinges his cheeks, and he looks away. “I… I can’t. I don’t…”

Cupping his jaw, I turn his face back to me.

So much is at risk here. For both of us.

But if I don’t try to see this through, I’ll regret it.

Boldly, I steel my spine and give him my truth.

“I want you, Noah. I don’t know what you’ve been through or who you used to be.

But I want you, right now, exactly as you are.

I want the man standing in front of me.”

He swallows, his throat bobbing. Then his eyes flit over my shoulder. “What about—”

Still holding tight to him, I peer back at Mercer. Between his heated glare and the noticeable erection tenting his pants, it’s safe to assume that he’ll be more than okay with what I’m about to say.

“Oh, that guy back there?” I quip.

That earns me a cheeky little smirk from the man himself.

I shoot him a wink, then focus on Noah once more. “Mercer and I hadn’t discussed anything beforehand, but he’s right on target. I think his proposition is a good one.”

The air around us heats, the weight of it shrouding us as my words land.

For several heartbeats, it’s nearly silent, the only sounds our breathing and the crickets chirping beyond these walls .

Finally, Noah puts me out of my misery. His body relaxes. His hands float up, capture my hips, and caress down my sides. He gives himself a subtle, barely there nod—permission, I hope—then focuses on me again. “You… you want us both?”

I can’t hold back my grin any longer. “Both is good.” I snag the well-worn ball cap off his head and back up a few steps. “Don’t overthink it, Noah. If you want me”—I glance at Mercer, making sure my intentions are clear—“come get me.”

Then, spinning on my heel, I take off at a slow jog toward the entrance of the corn maze.