Page 36 of Almost Ravaged (Men of Evercrisp Orchard #1)

Chapter thirty

Sawyer

A ccording to Cam, the drive from the ice arena to the Ledges is about thirty minutes.

And for the last twenty-five, I’ve been pressed between the window and Tytus’s thigh.

Tytus’s massive, muscular thigh.

A massive, muscular, gorgeous thigh that’s on prominent display thanks to the way his shorts have ridden up.

Wait. Can thighs be gorgeous?

Because his really, really is.

It’s also bigger than I remember. Thick. Covered in dark hair with distinct muscle definition, even when he’s sitting.

I honestly can’t get over how big he is. I can’t recall the last time I had such an up-close-and-personal encounter with Ty’s upper thigh, but it’s definitely bigger than what I remember.

Good grief. I need to get a grip.

“This must be it,” Tytus murmurs as Bryant pulls into a spot in a mostly empty parking lot .

Only a handful of employees at the arena have completed vehicle training through the university and can check out the department’s fifteen-passenger van, and Cam was more than happy to let him drive.

A smooth ride, it was not.

But honestly, it’s likely the size of the vehicle was the problem. Or maybe how acutely aware I was of Tytus the whole time.

I gave up on maintaining any semblance of personal space about ten minutes into the journey. Ty had even less room than I did once Grant sat on his other side.

That’s why he draped his arm along the back of the bench seat. It’s the most logical explanation.

The group files out, though apparently Grant is a gentleman and allows the people in the row behind us to exit before taking his turn.

A tug of my hair and the responding tingling of my scalp startle me. With a quiet gasp, I dart a look at Ty.

“This was pitched as a ‘small group outing,’” he teases, tugging on my hair again for emphasis.

I swat at his hand. “You could have gone out with Atty and the rest of the hockey team instead,” I remind him. “Still can, if this isn’t your scene. Want me to call you a Lyft?”

I’m teasing, and he knows it. There’s significance in his choice to come out with me instead of Atty tonight. It’s weird, the three of us out on a Thursday night, but not all together. But it’s good for Atty to spend time with his teammates.

Cam made it clear to Bryant that Tytus was nonnegotiable, which paved the way for another hockey player, a freshman, to join the outing. Not that Ty has made much of an effort to acknowledge him.

According to the kid, Wyatt Haas, he grew up down the road from where we are now.

Once Grant finally exits, Tytus slides over and climbs out. When he offers me his hand, I gladly accept the help, and when I’m firmly on my feet, I loosen my hold.

Rather than release me, he stares down at me, the hint of a smile tugging at his lips, and shakes his head.

Then, without a word, he tightens his hold on my hand, tugging a little to urge me forward so we can keep up with the group .

I keep my gaze focused on my feet, counting the steps Tytus and I take in sync. All the while, my fingers tingle and electricity arcs up my arm.

It’s a familiar headspace, being on the precipice of something with Ty. Thoughts of both Mercer and Noah flutter through my consciousness as I hold hands with my first crush. A foggy confusion settles over my mind, my thoughts flitting from one guy to the next.

Agitation flickers through me as well. I need to get laid. I’ve got sexual frustration swirling inside me in spades.

“Wow,” Ty murmurs.

I look up, and at the sight before me, my breath catches. The field surrounded by trees in various colors. Reds and oranges. Yellows and browns. On every side, from every angle, we’re surrounded.

“Welcome to the Ledges, baby!” Arjun, who’s several meters ahead of us already, throws his arms out and spins in place.

“It’s beautiful,” I murmur, taking it all in.

Ty squeezes my hand once, garnering my attention, and when I look up, he’s solely focused on me. “It really is.”

With my lips pressed together, I squeeze his hand twice. He squeezes back.

I want to hope. I want to read into this. Though the excitement growing in my chest is quickly doused by my own self-doubt. We’ve been here before. We’ve been here so many times.

“Ty,” I warn. “What are we doing?”

He brings one finger to my lips, silencing me.

Eyes wide, I scan the group, worried about who might be watching and how it might look. But they’re all walking away, heading toward the trailhead they promised was just through the clearing.

“We’re here together,” he says simply.

His dark eyes are sincere, and his earnest plea sends my heart fluttering. It sends my hope soaring.

“We’re here,” he repeats, “so be here.”

A sense of longing pulls at the center of my chest. It’s familiar and it’s foreign and it feels like falling. But as scary as it is to be in the place with him, again , I refuse to pull back. I’m not going to be the reason we can’t seem to take the next step.

I want to trust him.

I want to hope .

Silencing the alarm bells in the back of my mind, I exhale.

We’re here together.

So, like he suggested, I’m going to be here.

“Okay.” With my lip caught between my teeth, I peer up at him and shift closer, positioning myself so our joined hands brush between our bodies.

“Sawyer, Tytus. Let’s go,” Cam yells across the clearing.

I turn and walk backward a few paces, relishing the way his eyes track my moves. I take another step away from him, then smirk.

“What’s that look for?” he asks, his voice low and gravelly. Like the weight of this moment is pressing down on him, too. Like he’s just as affected by the potential this night holds.

How long have I wanted this? How many days turned to weeks and weeks turned to years?

My next step backward is larger, increasing the distance between us.

Realization flickers in his expression.

I spin, then, over my shoulder, yell, “Race you to the trailhead.”

I make it a measly ten meters before I’m engulfed in strong arms and lifted off my feet.

My body tenses in response, though not because it hurts.

His arms around me feel incredible. I never want him to let go.

“Put me down.” I squirm and punch my fists into his back, giggling, as he strides forward.

Stilling, he does as I ask, though he doesn’t release me. Pinning my back to his chest, he drags his hands to my hips. He bows his head and exhales, his warm breath ghosting over my skin and tickling my neck. Then his lips are at my ear. “You always did love the chase, mon ange.”

A shiver rolls through me.

I splay my hands over his, trying in vain to turn around so I can face him. “Ty,” I plead, desperate for him to let me out of this hold now that the switch has been flipped.

This isn’t playful anymore. It isn’t fun.

This is real and raw and so damn close to being more .

“I’ll let you go, but don’t you dare run away from me again.”

I can hardly breathe as his hold eases up. I spin in his arms and press my hands to his chest to steady myself .

My lungs burn, my breath stalling out, as Tytus bows his head again and slips the large hands that only a moment ago held me captive to my lower back.

“Your friends are watching us,” he whispers, his lips centimeters from mine.

I peek over my shoulder and find several sets of eyes on us.

With a steadying breath, I turn back and wet my lips. “Let them watch.” Chest heaving, my nerve endings lighting up, I tip my head back. “I want you to kiss me.”

His eyes narrow, the almost black irises now indistinguishable from his pupils. “No.”

My heart sinks into my stomach. Tears instantly cloud my vision.

Before the rejection can fester, he nudges his nose against mine and brings his lips back to my ear. “Our first kiss isn’t going to be in front of an audience.”

Relief washes over me. Ty’s always been reserved, private. Of course he doesn’t want our first kiss to happen in front of my friends. Disappointed but not defeated, I search his face.

Brows knit, he brushes a thumb over the exposed skin of my back just above my waistband.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were cold?” He steps back, and in one quick move, he shucks off his hoodie.

Notes of musk, sweet vanilla, and bitter lime overwhelm my senses as he pulls the warm fabric over my head. I work my arms through the sleeves and pull my hair out of the hood. Then I gather up the opening at my neck and bring it to my nose, inhaling deeply.

Ty laughs. “You’re a fiend.”

“Only for your scent.” The words are out before my brain has processed them.

If he were anyone else, I might be embarrassed by that confession. But Ty knows me better than anyone.

He drapes an arm over my shoulders, pulling me close, and guides me toward the group. The group that is still very much focused on us.

“I am going to need this one back later,” he murmurs.

I snort. Not likely.

“I’m serious.” He jostles me, pulling me even closer. “You have what? Five, six of my hoodies in your possession these days?”

I shrug, as if I don’t keep count, when my collection has actually grown to eight. “I like to think of them as our children. You know, like we share custody? ”

He grumbles, his words unintelligible, feigning annoyance. I grin up at him, and I keep grinning all the way across the clearing.

“So you and Tytus?” Cam keeps her voice low as she circles the picnic table where some of the others sit so she can pass me the vape.

I take a hit and inhale deeply, savoring the sweetness and the calm that instantly infiltrates my senses.

Ty wandered off, his hands in his pockets, moments ago. He won’t smoke, or do anything that could risk his eligibility, and he doesn’t really like being high anyway.

I cough as I exhale, then finally meet Cam’s curious gaze. A giggle escapes me, all but confirming her question.

“Ledges, baby!” Arjun runs past us, ripping off his shirt.

I snort as I watch him go. He’s so boisterous and rowdy, but there isn’t a person at the ice arena I don’t like.

Cam snaps her fingers in front of my face. “Sawyer. Focus.”

“Sorry.” I blink rapidly. “What was the question?”

We’re smoking a grape-flavored indica one of my coworkers brought back from Michigan. It’s strong and sticky in the very best way.

She breaks into a giant smile. “Are you and Tytus a thing? Dating? Hooking up? I want deets.”

Me and Tytus. I don’t even know where to begin.

“It’s… complicated. I think we will date.

Eventually. Someday?” I cough again, and wave away the smoke.

“But there’s a lot of history there.” A lot of shared trauma, too, though I focus on the parts of the story that are easier to explain.

“We’ve been friends forever. And we’ve always had a connection. But it never goes anywhere. Or…”

Cam waggles her brows. “Or what?”

I heave a breath and lower my head. “Or it hasn’t gone anywhere in the past. But maybe tonight…”

She throws her head back and cackles. “Oh my god. You are so going to hook up with the hottie with the body new defenseman.”

“The one I’m not related to, yes,” I amend .

Cam smacks her hands over her mouth. “That’s right,” she hisses as she pulls it away. “Ty is your brother’s best friend. Oh my god. Oh my god , girl.” She does a little dance in her seat.

Cam is clearly a giddy, hyper stoner. Noted.

“Why are you bouncing and squealing?” Kai asks as they approach. “Are you already that high?”

Cam’s eyes flit from Kai to me, seeking permission.

I shake my head. I’ll gladly spill all the deets when I actually have something to share. It doesn’t feel right to dish about the boy I’ve almost hooked up with countless times.

“I’m just so happy to be here,” Cam loops her arms around Kai’s neck in an over-the-top display of affection.

Kai swats at Cam’s arms, which makes Cam squeeze tighter. That leads to Kai calling for backup, which is how Emerson and Drew get mixed up in their tussle.

With the lot of them distracted, I wander away from the group and turn toward the main attraction: the Ledges.

Because I’m me, I did a little research this afternoon. The Ledges are a natural rock formation made up mainly of cross-bedded conglomerate and quartz arenite sandstone. The plateau we’re standing on now has been around for millions of years.

After growing up in Cap-Saint-Jacques, I’m not often impressed by pretty sunsets and sweeping landscapes.

Little compares to the scenery back home.

But here, near the sharp drop-off of the cliffs, with this treetop view and miles of visibility, I’m hit with that exceptionally small, incredibly humble feeling that only nature can inspire.

Arjun approaches, unwinding a tightly packed hammock. “Ya know, you can see all the way to Canada from here.”

I squint, trying to discern whether he’s messing with me or not.

He scoffs at my apprehension. “I’m serious. See where the trees end? That’s Lake Erie. Then the next landmass beyond that is Canada.”

That can’t be right, can it?

I close my eyes and try to picture a map. Or a globe. Any image I’ve stored in the recesses of my mind that could help me argue with this man. But my mind is hazy, and all I can do is giggle .

Ty approaches, and as it so often does, my focus instantly shifts to him and only him.

Despite being surrounded by forest, he’s the only tree I want to climb.

He’s wearing a thin T-shirt and a pair of slutty little athletic shorts. Shorts that I’m quite fond of, thanks to the expanse of thigh they expose for ogling.

I snort at my own salaciousness. Why is he dressed like that? He’s got to be freezing.

“What’s going on here?” He steps up beside me and weaves an arm behind my back, resting a hand on the curve of my hip.

I turn into him and rest my chin on his chest. “Hi.” The single word leaves me on a giggle.

God, he’s fun to look at. He’s got the sharpest jawline. The best hair. Lips I’ve dreamed about kissing for years.

I hope he kisses me tonight. He has to, right? After our moment in the field, I need him to put me out of my misery and confirm his mouth is as kissable and delicious as I’ve always fantasized it would be.

Brows knitted, he studies my face. “You’re high.”

I giggle again. “Just a little.”

Before he can lecture me, I turn around and point out over the trees at nothing in particular. “He says that’s Canada. Does that look like Canada to you?”

I lean against his chest, pressing my back against his front.

I want him to touch me. I want him to hold me.

But when I sink into him, he captures my hips and holds me in place while he inches back.

Heart in my throat, I peer back at him. I can’t read his expression. He’s focused on the view, face unreadable. I take him in, assessing the boy I’ve been in love with for as long as I’ve known what love meant.

Tonight has to be the night. This is our shot. It’s what we both want, and I’m tired of waiting. I told him point blank I wanted him to kiss me. It’s up to him to decide what happens next.