Page 15 of A Simple Marriage (Millionaires of Mayfair #2)

Pippa struggled with what to say. But she’d never been shy around Hugh, particularly this evening. No man had seen her completely naked except for him. And by the appreciation in his eyes, he enjoyed her body. Well, she adored his, but that fact wouldn’t help her in her cause.

He buttoned his falls and slipped his shirt over his head. She wanted to mourn the covering of his beautiful body. Once she was alone, she would try and draw him complete with an erection. It would allow her to always remember this evening and him. She would keep it locked in her desk along with her private journal. After she drew Hugh, she’d write down everything she’d experienced this evening. The wetness of his mouth after he’d pleasured her. The taste of her arousal on his lips. The surprising heat of his hard body against hers. Simply thinking about what they’d shared made her want to do it all over again. Was it any wonder? He was a beautiful specimen of a man.

“Mignon graciously gave me another two weeks to see if I can come up with the funds to purchase her shop.” She twisted her fingers, a nervous habit when she was trying to figure things out.

“I could loan you the money.” Hugh scooted closer and pulled her onto his lap.

The warmth of his embrace offered a comfort she didn’t know that she needed. She buried her head against his chest. It was a sanctuary that kept her from dwelling on her future.

“I can’t take money from you,” she said softly as she slipped off his lap and sat beside him. “I would never jeopardize your friendship with my brother.”

She had to create some distance, or she’d be kissing him again. Funny, but she’d never realized how much she enjoyed touching him. She’d always enjoyed his company, but tonight was so much more. He was her confidant and for just this one evening, her lover.

“I need to meet more men.” She peeked at him as she rested her head on bent legs.

“Do you?” he asked with a sardonic lift of an eyebrow.

She lifted her own brow in answer.

He strummed his fingers on an outstretched leg and looked at the ceiling as if deep in thought. He snapped his fingers, then turned to her. “I have the perfect solution. It’s brilliant. I can marry you.”

She shook her head before he finished. “We’ve discussed this. You don’t want to marry. I don’t think I can marry you.”

“Of course.” He laughed, but there was a bitterness to it. “Tell me again your reasoning.”

She reached over and took his hand in hers. “Hugh, I can’t marry you because I don’t want a husband-husband. I just want a husband.”

“What’s the difference?” He played with her fingers.

“With a husband-husband, you fall in love and your whole world falls apart. My mother and father had a love match that quickly turned into a hate match. They were unfaithful to one another. Every time my mother had an interaction with my father, she’d come away crying until she eventually withdrew into herself. It was as if there was no emotion in her anymore.” She released a halting breath.

Hugh ceased his playful touch, but he didn’t let go of her hand.

“I hated being the person between my parents' hatred of each other. You see, with their grand passion, they developed ‘grand hatred,’ and sometimes, that hatred was directed at me.” She pulled her hand away and curled her arms around her bent legs.

He studied her. Finally, he broke the silence. “For a moment, I didn’t understand, but I think I do now,” Hugh whispered. “Love maims a person. My own mother is proof of that. She practically fell apart after my father died. I almost lost her. She wouldn’t eat. She wouldn’t leave her bedroom. It was as if she wanted to die. It took the will of Aunt Edith to pull her through.” He shook his head. “I can’t go through that again. I won’t do it.”

“Your mother?” It’s hard to believe that his beautiful mother had grieved so deeply that she wanted to die. She would have left two young boys behind. A chill ran up Pippa’s spine at the thought. “I’ve always admired your great-aunt. I knew she was strong-willed. But her strength with your mother is rare.” She grew quiet for a moment, then stared at Hugh. “I also admire your mother. She’s not still grieving, is she?”

“Rarely, but she still has spells when she becomes lost in the past.” This time, he was the one to stare into the fire. “But I have a problem.”

“What is it?” she asked.

Slowly, his gaze met hers. The reflection of the fire in his eyes made them appear indigo. “I can’t leave you.” He pressed his mouth to hers. The touch was sweet and tender. “I couldn’t leave you any more than the earth could leave its orbit.” He rested his forehead against hers. “Or a wave could leave the sea.”

His confession was like tinder to a fire. Tenderly, she kissed him and closed her eyes. He destroyed her with those words as they would forever be engraved upon her heart.

And she was afraid her heart couldn’t take much more.

“I can’t imagine you with another man. It would drive me mad.”

“I can’t imagine you with another woman either,” she said softly then shrugged. “But the truth is that I’ve never seen a good marriage.”

“What about Honor and Trafford?” His voice had grown quieter, but she could hear every word as he cupped her cheeks and rubbed his thumb over her bottom lip.

“She went through hell to have him. I’m not strong enough for that.”

This time, he pressed his lips to hers. “I believe the opposite. You’re stronger.” When she started to shake her head, he put his forefinger to her lips. “Hear me out. Your work on your financial plan and budget is nothing short of phenomenal. Your designs are creations of art that you labor endlessly with until they’re perfect. And I’m in awe of how you care for others, such as my great-aunt and mother. All of that is you and your strength and your heart.”

He slayed her with his pure, poetic words, then cut her open, spilling every hope and desire on the floor in a pool of need. She’d never be able to put herself back together, and he was the reason why.

She had to remember that truth if she wanted to protect herself from heartache.

Hugh walked up to the entry of Ardeerton House. He’d been here thousands of times and knew every inch of it as well as his own homes. However, he’d never been this nervous before.

But everything changed last night when he’d held Pippa in his arms. He’d come home at four o’clock in the morning and had fallen into bed. He’d slept for six hours and then dressed. He waited until an appropriate time to call on Pippa. It was four in the afternoon, and he’d been consumed with seeing her again.

He wasn’t lying when he confessed that he couldn’t not be here.

A footman dressed in the gray and gold livery of the Duke of Pelham swung the door open. “Good afternoon, my lord.”

“Welcome to Ardeerton House, my lord.” Ritson waved a hand for Hugh to enter.

“Thank you,” Hugh said in return.

As soon as he stepped inside, Ritson appeared with a brief bow, then peeked behind Hugh’s shoulder. “Are Lady Ravenscroft and Lady Edith with you?”

“No.” He swept the beaver hat off his head and gave it and his formal dove gray gloves to the footman who had let in the house.

Ritson blinked twice in confusion, then smiled. “Since the Duke of Pelham isn’t in town, I assumed that you were bringing the ladies to see Lady Pippa.”

“No, I’m here to see Lady Pippa.”

“Lord Ravenscroft.” Pippa stood on the stair landing looking like she’d stepped out of an Ackerman’s fashion plate. The salmon-colored dress was beaded across the bodice with puffed cap sleeves. She wore an ivory shawl that matched the ivory ribbon tied around the empire waist. It amazed him that he was starting to notice women’s fashion and it was all because of her.

“Lady Pippa, it’s a pleasure.” He bowed and then flashed his most winsome smile her way.

She continued down the stairs, but a blush that rivaled a basket of ripe cherries colored her cheeks. She had to be remembering last night just as he was. His cock thickened slightly. He had suffered from the condition all day.

There was only one cure for his affliction. Plows and sheep manure. That’s where he needed to direct his concentration.

By then, she stood before him. “What are you doing here?”

“To see you.” His gaze went to Ritson and the footman, who were in discussion across the entry and completely oblivious to Pippa and him. “Let’s go to your study.”

She blushed again, but his stalwart Pippa never turned away.

“Last night, I was thinking about your plans. I’d like to review them again.” It took every ounce of restraint he possessed not to take her in his arms. “I’ve thought of something that might sway your brother.”

Her eyes lit up like fireworks over Vauxhall Gardens. She turned to her butler. “Ritson, when Lady Grace returns from her errands, will you inform her that I’m meeting with Lord Ravenscroft? She’s welcome to join us.”

“I will, my lady.” Ritson smiled. “I’ve already had a tea tray prepared and sent to your study.”

“You are a treasure,” Pippa said affectionally. The butler blushed at her compliment, proof that it wasn’t just Hugh who was under her spell.

“Shall we?” She turned and started down the black and white tiled hallway that led toward her study.

“Should Alice attend you?” Even he was aware of propriety when it came to a young lady’s reputation. If someone else called upon her, it wouldn’t do if he was alone with her. Of course, he sounded like a hypocrite since he’d been naked on the floor with her in his arms.

Pippa shook her head. “She’s gone to the market to pick up a few pieces of trim for me. We can leave the door open. We’ll be fine. I’m not expecting any visitors.”

As soon as they were in the room, she went to her desk and picked up her journal and several pieces of parchment paper. “I’ve neatly copied my budget and business proposal into this journal. These pages are my scrap paper.”

“Excellent.” Hugh took the items from her. “Where shall we sit?”

“At my worktable.” Pippa went to her sewing area and cleared the table of the fabric and trim that she had been working with last night when he’d come to see her. “The dresses for your mother and great-aunt are finished.”

He felt as if a brick had been thrown into his stomach. He grew silent at the news. That meant he might not see her as often as he had over the last two weeks. He had to find other reasons. “I see.”

Well, he’d tell her his thoughts and be on his way. It was true that he’d thought of a few things she could do to sweeten her proposal so her brother would agree to her purchasing the shop. Perhaps he’d shocked her last night with the things that they’d shared. But she’d seemed as eager to be with him as he was with her. He was overthinking her every word.

“I finished these so they could wear them to the Cartwright’s soiree this week.” She walked to the sitting area and gently laid the fabric and trim across a chair back. “At first, I thought if I finished the dresses then I’d see less of you. I thought it would be a good thing since Stanhope had expressed a clear interest in me. But after last night…”

When she started to wring her hands, he walked to her side and took both of them in his. “But after last night?”

Her lips were turned up in a smile, but there was a sense of sadness or melancholy about her eyes. “Last night, you said you can’t stay away.”

When she bit her lower lip, he leaned down and kissed her. To hell if any servant saw them. She pulled away and blinked once, then twice, as if coming out of a daze. He knew the exact feeling.

“I don’t want to stay away from you either. I also want to continue visiting your mother and great-aunt.” Her smile wobbled, and her eyes grew a bit misty. “Thank you for sharing them with me. It’s almost as if I’m part of your family.”

Pelham’s words rang through his thoughts. The sense of yearning on her face was unmistakable. She desperately wanted a family of her own. He’d give her anything and everything if he could erase the hint of grief around her face.

He smiled softly. “I know my family feels the same way.”

Her face brightened with warmth. “I can’t tell you how much that means to me.”

Hugh vowed not to say another word. Otherwise, he’d sputter all sorts of words about devotion and adoration. Heaven forbid if love was mentioned. Pippa would run in the opposite direction. He had to have his own mind and thoughts clear, or he would say something that would damage both of them. He had no doubt she cared for him, and he for her. But neither was ready to see what, if anything, their future held. Much less say the words aloud.

“Shall we sit?” Hugh held out a chair for her.

Elegantly, she crossed the room and took her seat. The hint of lilacs surrounded her. He inhaled deeply. It was the pure essence of Pippa. He’d recognize it anywhere. He wanted to bathe in her scent.

Heaven help him.

He took the seat beside her.

She pulled open the journal to her proposal and her budget. She pointed to a column marked inventory. “I’ve decreased the amount of stock by twenty percent. I won’t carry the heavy wool and velvets until early autumn. There won’t be much demand for cloaks, redingotes, and formal winter gowns until then. That will help defer costs. The only risk is whether my vendors will have sold out by then.” She swallowed but didn’t look at him. “It’ll be too late to order any of the gorgeous fabric from the continent, but I’ll make do.” She pointed to another column marked wages. “I’ve also thought about doing most of the sewing myself at least for the first year. I’ll still employ Mignon’s current staff. But I can hire apprentices after the first year.” She swallowed. “That presumes I succeed.”

He rested one arm over the back of her chair, then placed his free hand over hers. “I don’t think you have to cut your costs.” When she turned to look at him, he squeezed her hand and smiled reassuringly. “What your brother understands more than anything is profit. If you can show him that this venture will make money and that you’re willing to put your all into it to make it a success, you might be able to change his mind.” He played with the fingers of her hand. “You’d still have to go out into society. He wants you happy and believes marriage is the vehicle for that.”

A resigned sigh escaped her. “You make a good point about him. Instead of only emphasizing the cost savings, I should concentrate on the profit projections for the next three years. I should have thought of that earlier.”

“I find that sometimes it’s hard to see what’s beneath our noses when we get too close to something. That’s what happened here.” Lud, would she think he was referring to her proposal or them? Even he wasn’t certain what he meant as the temptation to lean in and kiss her was becoming harder to resist.

Pippa leaned toward him as she studied his face. Her gaze heated as she swept her tongue across her pink lower lip. He groaned at the sight. He should just put himself out of his misery and kiss her again like he did last night. Maybe that would satisfy their hunger. He wasn’t fooling himself any longer. Only she could satisfy him. For his own sake, he should stay as far away from her as possible if he wanted to keep his thoughts intact.

But of course, his mind had other ideas. Suddenly, he found himself a tad closer to her until there was barely an inch between them.

“Hugh, what else can’t I see because it’s too close to me?”

“To answer your question, it’s me. I’m the one you can’t see because I’m right behind you,” the Duke of Pelham bit out. “What I see clearly is that he’s about to maul you.”