Page 54 of A Secret and a Lie

I’m going to need a neck brace for this serious case of whiplash.

“I want to test something. No expectations. No sex. I just…I know you feel this, too.”

At the mere idea of kneeling for this man, my pussy clenches. Absolutelynothinggood can result from dropping to the floor.

My straight hair swishes around my neck as I shake my head. “I’m not here to get on my knees for you. I want—”

“Answers,” he interrupts. “I know. I’ll give them to you.”

His demand swirls in the air, picking up speed the longer I’m silent.

Kneel for me. I know you feel this, too.

Unfortunately, Idofeel it.

This is an idiotic idea of epic proportions, yet I can’t seem to stifle the craving to fall down before him, the yearning to trust him with my body, mind, and spirit, the urge to pass him the leash tethered to my control.

He’s patiently waiting, allowing me the space to make this decision for myself.

And with my heart in my throat, I don’t hesitate any longer. My body responds for me as I sink to the floor, the thick-ply rug separating my kneecaps from the dark hardwood. I close my eyes as feelings I’ve buried for fourteen years barrel through me. Emotion twists and writhes in my stomach before curling around every cell in my body, infiltrating me wholly.

“Open your eyes,” he orders, and like a good submissive robot, I obey.

My eyes burn with unshed tears, my vision blurry, but I refuse to cry. I’m on my knees for him, but I can’t submit to a man I don’t trust. And I trust Ford about as well as a bakery owner trusts a bread thief… Yet here I am.

I don’t understand how I ended up in this situation, but there’s no deluding myself into thinking this feels anything but fucking perfect.

“Incredible,” he whispers, as if he can’t wrap his head around this moment either.

Blinking back more tears, I stare up at him, my head going silent and my body relaxing as I lose myself in the feeling of sweet surrender. He cups my cheek with his palm, his gaze reverent as his thumb swipes over the bone. He feels this, too.

I’m never getting answers now.

Ford

“Tell me why you won’t let this—us—happen. You can’t honestly say that submitting to me isn’t as natural for you as this is for me.”

There’s no realistic way for us to be together, not now, but she doesn’t know that. But it’s impossible for me to let this go. It’s what I’ve wanted from her since the moment we met at the bar.

I drop my hand from her cheek, waiting for her eyes to meet mine. As she cranes her neck, gazing up at me, I notice that her pupils are blown, blotting out the alluring hazel shade that usually sparkles there.

Has she noticed how hard I am?

I wanted to see how this dynamic felt, though I almost wish I hadn’t since now that I’ve experienced it, I fear I’ll be an addict for life. This is nothing like what I felt when Sloane knelt before me. Nothing in my entire goddamn life has felt as right as this.

“Talk,” I demand, my lips curling into a smirk as I add, daring her, “Iwillspank you. Answer me.”

The words seem to fly from my mouth of their own accord, as the more innate, carnal part of my brain takes over. Around Genevieve, the side of myself that this mission unlocked is more awake than ever.

Her eyes flash with lust and trepidation, and I understandher concern. We don’t have a dynamic built on trust. She blew in here accusing me of bugging her phone, for fuck’s sake—which I did.

Despite not having that base layer of trust, she still finds her mouth working. “I had a…bad experience with a man I submitted to fourteen years ago.”

The glassy nature of her gaze shatters, revealing betrayal, hurt, and strength as she continues. “He taught me that I’m the only one I can trust with my body and mind.”

Her vague statement reverberates through my brain, further cementing what I already suspected, until the shock waves are so intense that I’m sucking in a small, startled gasp.

However, she doesn’t pick up on it, her lips pouty and pinched as she peers up at me, the swell of her breasts rising and falling with heavy breaths. She’s gorgeous like this, on her knees and at my mercy.