Page 34 of A Rogue’s Kiss: The Complete Series

Eight

C ordelia was sitting at her dressing table, considering her options, when a housemaid approached her door.

“My lady.” The maid curtseyed. “I am sorry to interrupt, but you have a caller.”

“Who is it?” Cordelia asked, not at all sure if she wished for company.

“Lady Celia, ma’am.”

Cordelia huffed an unladylike sigh. Of all the people who might call on her, she’d never have guessed Celia. Not after how she’d betrayed Cordelia.

“Should I inform the lady that you are not home to callers?” The maid asked.

Cordelia considered turning Celia away, but decided she would like the company. Even though Celia had betrayed her, they were still friends, and Celia knew everything that had transpired between Cordelia and Nathaniel—leastwise, everything until their wedding. She might be the perfect person for Cordelia to talk with.

She waved her hand and said, “I will see her. Show her to the gold parlor, and have tea and biscuits sent.”

“Right away, my lady.” The maid bobbed a curtsey then backed from the room.

Fifteen minutes later, Cordelia stared at Celia, disbelieving the woman dared to call on her and being exceedingly grateful at the same time.

She did so need a friend. Someone she could speak frankly with and unload her burdens on. It seemed only fitting that Celia would be that friend.

After all, it was she who set this entire disaster in motion. Cordelia sighed. She was being unfair, and she knew it. Celia was not to blame for the whole catastrophe, only the part where Nathaniel discovered her condition. Regardless, Cordelia could scarcely hold a grudge against Celia when she well knew her friend did what she thought best for everyone involved.

“I must admit to being surprised at your visit, though I am pleased to see you,” Cordelia said, as she lowered herself onto the settee across from Celia.

Celia blushed and averted her gaze for a heartbeat before returning it to Cordelia. “I feared you might be cross with me and wanted to allow some time for you to adjust. Otherwise, I would have called sooner.”

Cordelia grinned, a little laugh escaping her. “I was quite vexed. In fact, I only just forgave you.”

Celia played with a fold in her skirt as she said, “I never wanted to hurt you. I only wanted what was best for you and the child.”

“I know,” Cordelia said, “though I doubt marriage to Nathaniel is best. All we have done is argue, and I fear for the life we will provide for our child.” Cordelia wondered how much she should reveal, given Celia’s inability to keep secrets. But then, were any of Cordelia’s fears truly secret?

“Perhaps I can help, that is, if you would like to confide in me. I do so wish to see you happy, Cordelia.” Celia offered a genuine smile. “I will not deny that I am given to meddling, but you have my word, I will keep your confidence.”

Cordelia returned the smile. She truly needed someone to talk to, and when one considered how much Celia already knew—well, what harm could come from confiding in her? And so Cordelia told Celia everything that had transpired since the day Nathaniel burst into her family home and demanded marriage.

She reached for a biscuit as she finished the tale. “After this morning’s argument, Nathaniel stormed from the house.” She blew out a frustrated breath. “I cannot live like this, nor can I force my child to.”

“I can certainly understand your desire to have a peaceful, loving home.” Celia sipped her tea.

“Then you agree, I must disappear?”

Celia shook her head. “Heavens no. I think you should lower your defenses. At least enough to get to know Nathaniel. Perhaps if you understood him, his past, his hopes for the future, you could overcome your objections.”

“My objection is to being saddled with a rogue. Getting to know him will not change the fact that he is a rake.”

“Many men are rogues before they marry. It is not at all uncommon. Neither is it uncommon for a rogue to reform. All I am saying is that you never know. He could devote himself to you and the child. You could be happy. It is even possible that the two of you could find love. But only if you allow him a chance.”

Cordelia nibbled her lip. “Part of me desperately wants to give the union a chance. I am attracted to my husband and cannot deny that we share a passion, but that is exactly the thing that scares me. If I lower my defenses, I may well fall in love with him. And then what?”

Celia patted Cordelia’s hand and smiled. “What if he falls in love with you? Then the two of you will have everything you want.”

“But what if he does not come to love me? Or what if his love is short-lived and he tires of me?” Cordelia asked, running all sorts of horrid scenarios through her head. “What would happen to our happy home? To the child and me?”

“Anyone who pretended to have those answers would be a liar. But I can tell you that love is always a gamble. Even if one falls for a proper gentleman, there are no guarantees he will return the lady’s affections and be faithful for all their days.”

“But I daresay the odds are better.”

“Perhaps.” Celia agreed, then added, “But I have always heard that rogues are more fun.”

“Scoundrels!” Cordelia brushed a stray curl from her eye. “They are not to be trusted.”

“Regardless, you are married to Nathaniel. You might as well at least give the match a chance. Even if you were to run, you would still be his wife. And you would lack the finances to care for yourself and the child.”

“I will not run.”

“Good.” Celia gave a firm shake of her head. “And since you do not wish to live at war, it seems your only option is to try to make your marriage work. Share your fears with Nathaniel. Have an open and honest conversation.” She gave a mischievous grin. “I believe he might surprise you.”

Cordelia glanced out the window. “I suppose we will find out.” She looked back at Celia. “That is if he ever returns home.”

N athaniel did not know what to do or where to go. All he knew for sure was that he could not remain in the same house as Cordelia. He started off for White’s, intending to drink himself into a complete stupor. When he arrived at the entrance along St. James’s Street, he could not bring himself to cross the threshold.

Instead, he had gone to Selkirk’s house where he now lounged in a high-back chair awaiting a drink. He and the duke had been friends for years. Furthermore, Selkirk had the type of marriage Nathaniel craved. Perhaps his friend could give him some much-needed advice.

Nathaniel had married Cordelia with the best of intentions and truly wanted their union to be strong. He wanted to give his son or daughter everything he had been deprived of—love, understanding, guidance.

Why did Cordelia insist on standing in his way?

The woman was beyond maddening. She spoke as though she had the same desires for their child, then fought him at every turn. She couldn’t possibly believe their child would be better off without him. Better off living a lie in which his mother was a widow. Could she?

Nathaniel shook his head, and glanced at Selkirk.

“That bad, is it?” Selkirk asked.

“Worse.” Nathaniel took the tumbler Selkirk offered him and tapped his finger on the side of the crystal glass. “I do not understand women.”

Selkirk chuckled, his blue eyes filling with amusement. “No man does.”

“I am inclined to believe you. However, Cordelia is extraordinarily confounding. No matter what approach I take, she grows angry. The woman acts as though I ruined her life while she played no role in the destruction.”

“Did you seduce her?” Selkirk asked, genuine interest in his gaze.

Nathaniel took a long drink of his brandy, relishing the way it warmed his insides. He shook his head in denial. “She’s as responsible as I am. Not that who seduced whom makes any difference. She’s pregnant, and we are married. Nothing is going to change that.”

“Indeed.” Selkirk relaxed into the chair across from Nathaniel and crossed his legs at the ankles. “I guess the question is, what do you want now?”

“Forgiveness, for what I am uncertain, but she’s clearly livid with me. She keeps returning to my history of being a rogue and said she will not allow me to hurt our child… or her for that matter.” Nathaniel shook his head. “Can you imagine? The woman thinks I would bring shame and embarrassment on my son or daughter.”

Selkirk pressed his lips together in a tight line, a look of concern etched into the fine lines of his face.

“Cordelia refuses to even give me a chance to be a good husband. She actually suggested we be friends and forgo a romantic relationship. Then she demanded I not have affairs. I should say the devil with her. Wait for my child to be born, then send Cordelia to the country. Perhaps my child needs protection for its irrational mother.”

“I can understand your anger, Wolverton, but do not be hasty. Women need a gentle hand. Understanding, patience, and all that.” Selkirk twirled the brandy in his glass. “I think the problem is that you are not looking at the situation through her eyes.”

“You cannot be serious.” Nathaniel chuckled without amusement.

Selkirk raised a golden brow. “But I am quite serious, I assure you.”

“Bloody hell. Has everyone lost their wits?” Nathaniel massaged his temple.

“Hear me out.” Selkirk sat his brandy aside and stood to pace the library. After reaching the window facing the street, he turned back to Nathaniel. “There must be a reason she is fretting so much over your past. Her father has quite a reputation. Have you considered that maybe his behavior has caused her undue hardship? Maybe she worries you will cause more of the same, not only for her but also for the child.”

Nathaniel rubbed his palm across his jawline as he considered Selkirk’s words. If his friend was right, Nathaniel would have to prove himself to Cordelia before he’d have any hope of making their union work. But how?

He turned his attention back to Selkirk. “Assuming you are correct, how do you suggest I proceed?”

“With patience and understanding,” a feminine voice invaded the library, and Nathaniel turned to see Selkirk’s wife standing in the doorway.

Selkirk smiled proudly at his wife, then said, “Julia, love, do come in here. I believe a female perspective may be exactly what Wolverton needs.”

“Then surely three would be most appreciated.” Lady Celia sailed into the room with the Dowager Duchess of Selkirk on her heels.

“Indeed, Wolverton.” The Dowager met his gaze. “There is nobody better suited to advise you. After all, we are women.”

Nathaniel cleared his throat and stood. “I thank you for your kindness, ladies. However, I must be going.”

Celia grinned. “I’ve just come from calling on Lady Wolverton and believe she ready to work through the problems you two are experiencing. Do go straight home.”

His pulse sped at the proclamation, and a spark of hope ignited in his soul.

The Dowager clapped her wrinkled hand over Celia’s and scolded, “Do not be vulgar! You’ve no business poking around in the affairs of a married couple.”

“But grandmother…” Celia argued.

Nathaniel left the library before he could hear Lady Celia’s defense. Getting home to his wife was far more important.