Page 25 of A Life Diverted
F or the carriage ride back to Longbourn, the three occupants of the Bennet conveyance were each lost in their own thoughts.
Fanny was attempting to keep the tears from falling as she contemplated losing one of her beloved daughters. She reminded herself of her resolve that if Lizzy’s birth family ever claimed her, she would be happy to relinquish her daughter. But that had been almost seventeen years past.
Since then, Lizzy had taken up residence in Fanny’s heart, with no less space than any of the children born of her body.
As she sat trying her best to maintain her equanimity for her girl, who must be lost in a storm of emotions at that moment, Fanny resolved that she would do whatever was best for Lizzy.
She prayed that if her birth family did reclaim Lizzy, at least they would not deny her contact with the Bennets.
After all, they had been her family, and she theirs, for more than seventeen years.
Fanny thought how hard this would be on Miss Weasley. Rhonda had come to view Lizzy as a surrogate daughter. Because Lizzy had been with her parents and with Jane in London, Miss Weasley had remained home with the three youngest Bennets and their governess.
Jane! Fanny could not even imagine the sorrow Jane would feel if Lizzy were no longer living with them. She would have to write to Maddie and Edward in the morning and ask that they bring Janie home.
Bennet felt as if a horse had kicked him in his gut. On an intellectual level, he had always known the day that Lizzy’s birth family discovered her might come. However, as the years rolled by, he had thought that possibility more and more remote. And yet, it occurred this very night.
Of all of the coincidences in the world, two men who claimed to be part of Lizzy’s family were being hosted by Mr Bingley at Netherfield Park.
Perhaps had he denied the lease… Bennet stopped those thoughts, identifying them as supremely selfish.
It was better for Lizzy to discover where she came from, and if, as he assumed, her family had not wanted her gone like she had believed, it would heal many of the wounds to her soul.
He looked across the carriage at the forward-facing bench, first at Fanny.
Bennet could see her internal struggle to remain calm and tamp down her emotions.
After almost five and twenty years, he knew what Fanny was thinking at any given time.
Fanny would hate to part with Lizzy if it came to that.
As he thought the last, he knew he was only trying to fool himself.
Bennet sat up straighter as he thought about something.
His mother! As much as she loved all of her grandchildren, since the day Lizzy had arrived at Longbourn after the terrible loss his mother had suffered, there had been an unbreakable bond between them.
All Bennet could do was pray that his mother would not give up like she almost did after his father and Henry had been taken.
Seeing Lizzy reminded Bennet that the changes, something with which she had never been sanguine, would be the greatest for her.
Would her courage rise, or would she become that broken little girl who had come to them in January of 1794?
All he could do was hope and pray it would be the former and not the latter.
As he looked at the girl who would always be his daughter in his heart, no matter her family name, Bennet saw that like Fanny, Lizzy was fighting to maintain her equanimity .
Hearing the name Ellie had conjured up feelings which Elizabeth believed were long buried and forgotten. From the little she heard from Messrs Fitzwilliam and Darcy, who, if their assertions were true, were her cousins, she had never been unwanted; it was anything but that.
Why had she believed she had been sent away? Elizabeth knew that if the answers to those questions were to come, it would not be today or tomorrow. It would require something of which she did not have very much—patience.
The questions swirled in her head. Did her birth parents want to see her?
Did they still love her? Would they be angry with her for leaving her home?
Did she have more brothers and sisters? Would she see Willow…
Willowmere? The name jumped into her head.
Would she ever be able to see his face and remember the man who she saw in her dreams?
The dreams were no longer a distant memory.
Now that she had been discovered, her mind allowed them to reside where she could remember them, rather than making her forget.
Elizabeth knew she needed to calm her thoughts, because until she discovered more, she would not find any of the answers she sought.
How she wished Janie was home with her. She also wanted to know if the men who could be her cousins following behind the Bennets in their coach could tell her about herself before she became Lizzy Bennet.
For the first minute or two, the three occupants of the Darcy conveyance did not speak.
“It is quite extraordinary to discover Ellie Wendell at an assembly in Meryton. If your friend had not invited us, and we had not accepted the invitation to the assembly he rudely accepted on our behalf, how much longer would it have been?” Lady Catherine postulated.
“As soon as we arrive at Longbourn, one of the couriers must be sent to Fitzwilliam House.”
“You are correct, Aunt Catherine. The chances of us discovering her here in the fashion we did was infinitesimal.” Darcy agreed. “We must send a note to Matlock House as well.”
“Aunt Cilla and Mother were the only ones who refused to accept that Ellie was not in the mortal world, and they have been proved correct,” Richard observed. “Yes, we must send them epistles, but we have to be gentle. You both know how Aunt Cilla has suffered without Ellie over the years.”
“We will be very careful with the wording in the missives,” Lady Catherine stated.
“I know my sister Elaine will want to see her sister truly happy once again.” She paused as she got a wistful look in her eyes.
“As one who has lost a child, I can tell you there is nothing worse than that. I understand why Cilla would not accept Ellie was dead without seeing her body. Her faith is about to be rewarded.”
For the remainder of the short ride, the three were lost in their own thoughts.
~~~~~~~/~~~~~~~
As he handed his aunt out once they had arrived at Longbourn, Darcy looked around and even at night, could tell this was a prosperous estate.
He berated himself because he knew that he would have judged these people far below him, and they were not, and not only because of wealth.
These were obviously very good Christian people who, like the lessons the Son taught in the parable of the Good Samaritan, had helped one they did not know, just because it was the right thing to do.
Darcy remembered when he had introduced himself; Mr Bennet had said Longbourn and Netherfield Park ! Miss Bingley did not know she had insulted her landlord’s beloved daughter.
If Hill was surprised to see the three Bennets arrive back from the assembly early, and more than that, accompanied by three strangers, he did not show it as he and a footman collected the outerwear.
Mrs Bennet instructed the butler to have his wife deliver tea and refreshments to the main drawing room and to have the older Mrs Bennet and Miss Weasley join them.
Hill bowed and left to carry out his orders while Mrs Bennet led everyone towards the drawing room.
Once they had all sat, Lady Catherine looked around the room. “This must be a most convenient drawing room for the evening in winter. Unless I err, the windows are full west,” she observed.
“You are correct, Lady Catherine,” Fanny responded. “We do not use it during the summer evenings; rather, we use one of the other drawing rooms which face east.” Just then, Beth Bennet and Miss Weasley joined them, and after Lady Catherine requested she do so, Fanny made the introductions.
Beth looked from her son to Fanny to Lizzy. There was something afoot here. All she could hope was that the reason for her being asked to join them and for the presence of the three guests would soon become clear.
Just then Mrs Hill entered the room, and after bobbing a curtsy, had the two maids who followed her place the tea service and a tiered plate with three levels, containing little cakes, shortbread, and pastries, on the low table before the Mistress.
Fanny prepared a cup of tea for each person according to their preferences, beginning with Lady Catherine and then her nephews.
When Bennet noticed everyone was done with their tea and treats, he cleared his throat, drawing all attention to himself. “Mother, Miss Weasley, the reason you have been included is because this relates to Lizzy and her birth family.
Suddenly Beth felt a sinking feeling in her belly. She looked at Lizzy, who was fighting to maintain her equanimity.
“Mr Fitzwilliam, you told us your mother is the sister of the lady you believe bore Lizzy?” Bennet began. “Will you tell us what led you to suspect Lizzy is your lost cousin, Ellie?”
The instant Beth heard the name Ellie, she knew. She had heard Lizzy call that name out in her sleep.
“She was born on the fifth day of March in 1791 and named Elizabeth Elaine Wendell. Her names are for her late grandmother Granger and my mother, Lady Matlock…” Richard went on to describe Ellie’s almost three years at Willowmere.
“I remembered the name Willowmere!” Elizabeth exclaimed. Then she stopped her questioning and thought. “Excuse me, I should allow Mr Fitzwilliam to speak; I will have all the time I need to question him later.”
Richard took up the telling. He touched on his little cousin’s fascination with faeries and pixies. Next he told of how she loved to hide away. As he spoke, he saw how agitated Ellie…Elizabeth was becoming. “Are you well?” he asked.