Page 136 of A Lethal Game of Trust

He was made of contradictions that were tearing my heart in two.

He was gunpowder and lilies. Before me, he was the symbol of everything I lost and everything I could ever want.

Because after tonight, he would hate me. Maybe even hunt me.

But not like he had hunted me these last few months.

Hunt to kill.

The SWAT team still hadn’t lowered their guns. So I stepped back, hands raised.

“Stand down,” Dom ordered, not taking his eyes off me.

There was the shuffling of them disarming over Firdman’s never-ending moaning. His sniffing made me never want to swallow again. So I shoved the gag back in his mouth.

Two days ago, he had started closing his eyes when he saw me, wincing when he heard my voice.

And Dom’s expression wasn’t the one of distaste I had seenover and over, nor was it the wonder I had secretly hoped for.

Surely, he knew this was always something I was capable of.

The betrayal from the Belovs was just what topped it off.

Rocco pulled out a file from his rucksack on the floor and chucked it onto the dining table for Dom to read. He sat dutifully, going through what we had collected over the last few months.

But he took his time as the security team shifted awkwardly, watching over us. I only glared at Firdman. I would kill him, but I needed him for the next phase.

When he got to that certain document, I needed to gauge Dom’s reaction carefully.

“Wait, what?” he spluttered, staring at the last page. He blinked down at it, lifting it closer to read again. Then, exasperated, he scanned my face, searching for the punchline. There wasn’t one. “This is bullshit.”

This response seemed genuine.

“It’s not you,” I told him. “It’s Issy. I found it in my dad’s office when I came back.”

“You came back?” he asked, hurt clear in his voice.

“Snuck in with the gardening team one day.” I shrugged. I’d returned many times. Just wait for him to find out where I’d been staying.

“This is legitimate?” he asked, lifting the paper an inch in gesture.

Rocco nodded this time and I cringed. None of this was Issy’s fault, but she would be hurt either way.

“We did our own test,” he said, looking at Firdman. “It’s true.”

“Fuck,” Dom muttered and the deep timbre of his voice reminded me of all the times he’d sworn in my presence. Evennow, he had so much power over my body.

I was keeping it together, but I knew I would break if he wrapped his arms around me. With what I was about to do, there was no room for the weakness that was him.

“She doesn’t know,” Rocco urged. “Not yet.”

Dom only grunted again, his palm to his forehead.

“I’ll wrap up here,” Rocco said, looking at his friend with concern.

I nodded. The next part of my plan needed just the two of us before we went to the Belovs’. I told myself that, knowing I really just wanted a moment. One moment of us alone before there was no turning back.

With the gun, I could order Dom to stand and walk out to my car, but I grabbed his hand again because, against my better judgement and the hatred in my stare, my body had missed his.