Page 50 of A Lady of Means (Roses and Rakes #1)

Chapter Thirty-Nine

For days, the weight of both her Burn Book being publicly consumed, as well as her own secret reunion at the masked ball, held her down like it had strong hands pushing her under water.

Waves of regret and self-loathing filled her until she failed to see or breathe around it. She felt that it preceded her into a room making space for itself and that when people saw her, they saw her secrets, her shame, and her guilt too.

Except they didn’t.

They mostly treated her with the same deference as they did before. Maybe even a little fear.

Even George. When he came to call, he prattled on about parliament again and she listened with rapt interest, asking animated questions like she could hide the lie with her equanimity.

George lounged across from her at her tea table with one bespoke boot across his other knee. “You’re in a good mood today, practically buoyant.”

Was he looking at her extra closely today or was that her guilt insisting that he was?

“Policy making is exhilarating.” No, her voice was far too high; surely she gave herself away?

He chuckled, taking her hand. “If only I believed you.” She thought she heard a note of condescension or knowing in his voice, but he looked up at her with hopeful eyes. “Dare I be so bold as to assume…that it’s my presence you find exhilarating?”

She swallowed. Tell him now, the secret, given form and skin and teeth and claws, insisted.

“I don’t think that’s so bold, Your Grace.”

“It’s George, Moria,” he said, grabbing one of her hands and pulling her closer.

They were interrupted by Lady Olivia entering the sitting room. “Good afternoon, Your Grace. My sister sent me in here to look for a book she left behind.”

The words seemed to register between both George and Moria at the same time. “In other words, she sent you to spy…”

“I’ll only be but a moment and then I’ll leave you two to your…. discussion,” Olivia said.

Except she didn’t stay but a moment. The three of them turned at the open door as Noelle peaked her head in.

“This dratted bird of yours, Olivia. He won’t go back in his cage. I need your help, please.”

Olivia bit her bottom lip. “Should we leave the two of them unchaperoned with the way they are looking at each other?”

Noelle placed her hands on her hips. “Now, Olivia! Before I send your bird to work as a mine canary!”

“You wouldn’t dare!” Olivia said, bolting from the room.

Moria laughed instantly. George covered his mouth, but his shoulders shook with mirth.

Once they were alone, he leaned forward, taking one hand of hers in both of his larger ones.

“Just how was I looking at you?” he asked.

Moria pursed her lips, searching for the right words. “Like you were quite hungry, and I was the last snack on the tray.”

“You are. You are about to become my wife.”

Moria bit her lip. That was actually a very cute metaphor, but didn’t quite work with the pronouncement he’d made just a few days before. She edged closer, close enough to sweep the hair back from his eyes. “And would you…like to sample your last snack… before the shop closes?”

No! God, woman what are you thinking? Some part of her moth-eaten conscience railed at her.

His eyes were a familiar, soft green, the shade of grass beneath one’s feet on a dewy morning. But there was a crease between his brows. “Sample? Why would I sample the last snack on the tray? And why is the shop closing?”

Moria’s palm hit her forehead.

“Sorry, sorry,” he said, realization dawning. “You were continuing the metaphor, I get it now.”

He kissed her, but not solidly enough that she was thinking only of him.

* * *

“Olivia, what was that about?” Moria stepped into her sister’s room, closing the door behind her.

“He’s alive, isn’t he?” Olivia said, not looking up from the scientific journal she was reading.

“What do you mean?” Moria questioned, hugging her arms close to her chest.

“Shall I go into detail?” Olivia looked up, narrowing her eyes at her. “I can go into heavy detail if that’s what it takes.”

Moria sighed.

Olivia threw her book down and stood with a triumphant: “I knew it!”

Moria placed a hand over her sister’s mouth. “Keep your voice down.”

“Don’t worry, I haven’t told anyone,” Olivia muttered against her hand.

“Thank god you figured it out before anyone else in this family. No one can keep a secret.”

“Why do you want it to be a secret?”

Noelle called from the doorway, “Why do you want what to be a secret…. Moria?”

Moria cursed audibly. Her sister and her lock picking. Why could no one in her family choose a normal hobby like she had, like the pianoforte and embroidery?

Olivia threw on a bright smile. “How…much in love…she is.”

Noelle tilted her head to the side, disbelieving. “You’ll have to put on a better performance than that, Libby.”

Moria threw up her hands. “Devyn…is alive.”

Noelle pushed off the door and came to sit on the bed with her sisters. Ran her hands through her hair, then stood again and paced. Noelle was unnerving when she was so quiet.

“Moria,” Noelle said breathlessly, taking her by the shoulders, “Then you can’t marry the duke.”

“Why can’t Moria marry the duke?” Lawrence questioned from the doorway with his hands at his hips in mock authority. Moria turned to her youngest sister and grunted in frustration.

“Oh, curse you, Olivia!”

Her younger sister held up her hands innocently.

Lawrence closed the door with his boot and came to stand at the edge of the bed with his younger sisters, he crossed his arms at his chest. “I knew something like this would happen. What is it now?”

Noelle hit him in the arm. “It’s not what you think. Devyn is alive.”

Lawrence swore and shook his head. “The nerve of that bastard for not dying when he was supposed to.”

“I know, right?” Moria said.

“But you…. you’re glad he’s not dead, though, right?” Noelle bit her bottom lip.

Moria fell backwards on her sister’s bed and looked up at the ceiling. “I’ve never been gladder of a damn thing in my life.”

All three siblings whooped, laughing and jabbing each other in the elbows. Lawrence reached into his boot and drew out a flask. “We are all in so much trouble.”

Kathleen knocked on the door and Noelle shushed everyone. “What are you all doing in there? And without me?”

Moria shook her head. Both sisters raised their brows. Olivia opened the door anyway.

“We’re just…sharing in excitement with Moria…”

“About what?” Kathleen questioned.

“Can’t tell you at the moment! It’s a…surprise!” Olivia called. Kathleen let out a frustrated grunt, followed by the timely wail of an infant.

“I always hate your surprises, Libby! We will finish this conversation later, you four!”

Noelle, Olivia, and Lawrence turned to Moria. It was Noelle who spoke first. “You better tell us everything.”

“Leave nothing out,” Olivia said, both she and Noelle crowding around Moria on Olivia’s bed.

Lawrence held up a finger. “No please, leave anything out that will offend my innocence.”