Page 9

“Well, Pioneer fans, the season has not started the way any of us would have predicted. Two straight losses to start the year combined with the uncertainty about the quarterback position has Coach Bianchi looking for answers. He will hope to find them tonight as South Mountain hosts district rival Mount Joy High School. The Red Knights are 2-0 to start the season and must feel confident heading into tonight’s game with the Pioneers. The teams have already gone through warms-ups, and you can feel the anxiety from the home crowd.”

**********

Find yourself.

Gunner was kneeling in the endzone again, running his hands through the freshly cut grass. The stadium was quieter tonight, and he could hear his thoughts clearly. The image of his father from his coach’s TV still burned in his head.

You are going to find something special.

He stood up and peered toward the sprawling metal bleachers. The crowd was slowly trickling in, right before kickoff. He could see all the familiar faces, but tonight it was different. They were stoic, eyes forward, as if they were watching a game they didn’t understand. His gaze fell on the line of cheerleaders on the orange track and found his sister, who was hugging his mother before she stepped up into the crowd.

Be Gunner Weston.

He started moving slowly toward the sideline. His legs gained a new strength as he approached the pregame huddle.

The white-painted lines that were once a prison now felt like an opportunity. Sure, it was not the same, but it never would be. He was starting to understand that, and as he zoned in on the huddle, all his teammates turned to him.

Find yourself.

He sprinted the last few yards. Coach Bianchi was about to take his normal knee in the middle.

“Coach!” Gunner yelled as he barreled into the crowd of players. “Coach, I’d like to say something.”

The eyes of the entire team remained on him as Coach Bianchi stood up and adjusted his visor.

Please, Coach.

“OK Gunner, lead us out.”

He stepped into the middle of his teammates. The faces, older now, were the same ones that he had played with since he was six years old. They had grown up together, they had won games together, and as he locked eyes with each of them, he realized something he had been missing all this time.

They’re all lost.

He nodded and sat his helmet down, the reflection of the stadium lights gleaming off the top .

“I owe you all an apology.” He cleared his throat and adjusted the inside of his shoulder pads. “Not just because over the last few games I have acted like an idiot. Not because I have played like complete garbage.” Emilio, to Gunner’s immediate right, leaned toward him. “I wanted to apologize because I have lied to all of you.”

He met Ty’s eyes.

“For the last five months, I have told every one of you that I was fine. I acted as if I could handle all of this and be the same guy who has played with you all these years.”

Andy and JT exchanged a quick glance.

“But I lied.” He lowered his head, feeling everyone getting closer. “I’m not fine.”

OK, I said it.

It was like a weight lifted off his shoulders. The tightness he had been carrying around started to ease.

“In fact, I’m far from it.” He glanced back to Ty. “Every day I look at myself, and well, I feel like I have no idea what I’m doing.”

He put his hand on his hip and sighed.

“I realized today that I have been trying to do this all by myself. I thought I had to try to figure out all of this alone.” Emilio moved right up beside him. “You guys asked me to be your captain, and I failed you. I failed you because a captain understands that he must trust his teammates.”

A tear was sliding down his cheek, and he dashed it away.

“This team deserves to have captains who understand this and can use it to make us better.” He pulled even harder on his shoulder pads. “Because of that, I am giving up my role as captain of this football team. ”

An uneasy shift passed through the huddle.

“AG, JT, Ty, and Emilio,” he said, pointing to each in turn. “You have been the leaders that this team deserves. You are worthy captains. I don’t deserve to stand with you out on that field.”

The team was now anxiously shuffling around as the referee blew his whistle for the game to start.

“But.” He bent down and grabbed his helmet. “As captains, I’m going to ask you to give me another chance. I’m asking this whole team.” He turned to every player in the circle. “I need you, all of you.”

A sense of determination entered his stomach when he pointed out to the football field.

“My dad always said that this football team was a family, and it took a whole family to win a game.” He walked out, standing alone in front of the sideline. “And it’s time I asked my family to help me figure out what to do next. Starting with this game.”

The referee blew the whistle again, ushering the team onto the field.

Please.

Gunner clenched his helmet, his knuckles going white from the force.

He had played out this entire speech in his head while sitting alone at his locker but had never actually gotten to the end of it, to his friends’ decision.

One chance.

“You…” Emilio broke the silence and grabbed his shoulder pads. “You’re my brother, G. And I would help you, no matter what.”

JT and Andy joined instantly, and the rest of the team followed their lead.

“I know who you are,” Andy said, smiling at him. “You are a damn good football player, and---” He wrapped Gunner up in his arms. “You’re my brother.”

My brothers.

Gunner grinned as the team came together. However, he noticed that one of his teammates was missing.

Ty.

“No matter what happens tonight…” Emilio did not seem to notice the absence, and he broke into an impassioned shout. “No matter what happens, we do it together. We do it as brothers! They want to come to our field and beat us. Let’s show them what Pioneer football is all about! Family on three: one, two, three!”

Gunner broke the huddle and allowed the kickoff team to run by.

“Ty.” He grabbed his best friend, who was trailing behind. “Ty? We good?”

At first, Ty didn’t turn toward him. Finally, he smirked and twisted with a powerful thrust into Gunner’s chest.

“Yeah, man, let’s play some football.” It was not dismissive, but it was also not the impassioned shouts of his other teammates.

OK, Ty.

Gunner knew they needed to talk; the look on his best friend’s face made that clear. However, right now, they needed to play. They needed to win a football game.

“Well, here we go. It will be first down and ten for the Mount Joy Red Knights as they come to the line. Quarterback Blaine Sullivan gets behind center and calls out the cadence. He takes the snap and hands it off to his running back who… WOW! What a hit by Gunner Weston, who came flying up the field from his safety position and delivered a huge hit on the running back! Th at has to feel good for the young man who has struggled so much in the last few games.

OK, Sullivan brings his team back to the line for second down. He calls out the cadence and takes the snap. Sullivan drops back to pass…but is put under pressure by Cortez! Sullivan just throws it deep, looking for his wide receiver. He has a man down the field, and it is…”

While Gunner had never been a target on the scouting report in the past, he was sure the opposing team had watched tape from the last two games and would be looking to throw at him.

He had been lost, out of position, uncomfortable.

Not tonight.

Gunner felt the weathered pigskin nestle into his hands as he left the ground.

Hold it.

On this play, he was in the perfect position, and as he fell to the ground, he held tightly to the football he had snatched out of the air.

“G!” Ty shouted when he finally rolled to a stop. A roar from the home crowd reverberated into the air.

There’s that feeling.

It was one he used to love so much. The ground would almost shake after a big play. It was the sound of an entire town cheering for you. Cheering for all the hard work you had put in over the last week, the last month, the last year. He had missed it so much, and as Ty pulled him back onto his feet, he extended the football into the crisp night, holding it up for the town to see.

Interception .

He started screaming the single word as he took off, running toward his teammates. This time, it was his sideline jumping in celebration.

“That’s how you play defense! That’s how you play defense!” Coach Bianchi was still clapping when Gunner made it over.

“G!” Emilio smacked the top of his helmet. “That’s you, G! That’s you!”

“Nice hit, Emilio!” Gunner could feel his adrenaline pumping as he slapped Andy’s shoulder pad. “Now, let’s give this crowd something to really cheer about!”

He motioned to his coach, on whose face a grin was beginning to grow.

He smiled.

“Gunner.” Coach Bianchi leaned over close. “They think we are going to line up and run Ty directly at them. Let’s finally give him some room in the middle.” Gunner agreed with a nod. “Gun right, 121 action go. JT.” His coach shifted over to the tall, lanky wide receiver. “I want you to run as fast as you can, you hear me?”

JT nodded immediately.

“Remember, this is your game, guys. Play your game, and let it come to you!” Coach Bianchi pumped his fists.

Our game.

Gunner was oozing with confidence as he led the offense onto the field.

Let the moment come to you.

“OK, so it will be first and ten for the Pioneers after an excellent start on defense. Gunner Weston, who has struggled this year, will try to build off the momentum of his fantastic interception as he comes to the line. Weston calls out his cadence and takes the snap. Weston hands off…wait, he fakes it to Carter and drops back to pass! Weston steps up and throws one deep! He is looking for Jefferson Taylor, who is running free down the right sideline…”

Touchdown.

Gunner’s legs were already moving at full speed down the field. He was screaming at the top of his lungs---it all just poured out. It was not tears, it was not anger; it was pure joy. It was the most he had felt in months, and as he hit the endzone, he tackled JT in excitement.

“That’s how we do it! One hell of a catch, JT!”

His friend was grinning ear to ear when they both popped up, the rest of the team mobbing around them.

“That’s who you are!” Andy grabbed Gunner by the facemask. “You’re Gunner Weston! The best damn quarterback in the state!”

Gunner wrapped him up as they made their way to the sideline, raising his hands to a crowd that was finally back on its feet, cheering. He pointed to his mom. Her smile was the widest he had seen in months, and it set him in a sprint right past the bench to his sister.

“That was for you, baby sis!” He picked her up in an embrace. Her joyous shriek only filled him up more.

That’s for all of us.

**********

“Well, what a difference a week can make, Pioneer fans. One minute it looks like the sky is falling, and the next it feels like we may have found some answers. A blowout victory tonight for our young men as they win 48-14 against district rival Mount Joy. Gunner Weston was fantastic, throwing four touchdowns, and Tyquan Carter added two more running the ball, as the South Mountain offense looked unstoppable. You have to wonder if Coach Bianchi can keep this momentum going…”

“You should have come!” Juliana shouted, running into the auditorium. “It was amazing! The boys were great!”

Sounds like it.

Hailey quickly clicked out of the radio on her phone and grabbed her books.

“Sorry, I stayed late to wait for my dad and was just putting together some notes.”

Hailey had to lie. She was not going to tell her friend that she had listened to the entire game, hanging on each play like it was her last breath. Now she was excited to get home and to see her father. She was looking forward to hearing about each play he had called and how great his team had performed.

Maybe he’ll talk about Gunner.

She paused as Juliana joined her on stage.

Why do I care if he talks about Gunner?

He’d played a great game; the guy on the radio had made that clear. But every time she heard his name, she felt something more than celebration or pride. The butterflies overwhelmed her stomach---she wanted to hear his name during each play.

Stop it, Hailey!

“I thought we promised we wouldn’t start until Monday!” Juliana grabbed her arm and ushered them down the steps.

“I know. It’s just we are so far behind and have so much work to do.”

So much.

The two walked into the hallway .

“Hailey.” Juliana spun to her. “You already sound fantastic. It’s like, it’s like you were born to lead and star!”

Everyone needs to stop saying that.

“I was not born to star. I’ve just had a lot of practice.”

She opened the main door to the school, heading out into the late summer air, which was already hosting an undercurrent of cool, autumnal chill. The breeze intermingled scents of freshly cut grass, spearmint, and cooling pavement.

“I just hope…I just hope Bridgette is OK with me taking over the lead.”

Hailey was becoming distracted by the stadium lights below.

“Bridgette?” Juliana threw her head back and laughed. “Bridgette will be fine. Plus, she is still playing a major part. I actually think she is better in her new role, anyway.”

I would love to play that role.

Hailey kept her eyes on the emptying stadium as Juliana pranced ahead.

“I don’t know, Juliana. I just feel like, I don’t know, I feel like everyone treats me differently.” She stepped off the curb and into the parking lot. “I feel like they think I am weird, like…I don’t know.”

Juliana grabbed her shoulder and brought her close.

“Hailey,” she said, a smile on her face, “they’re just a little intimidated by you. I mean, let’s be real, girl. You are, well, you are a shock to this town.”

Not what I needed to hear.

Hailey could only shrug.

“You’re talented, you’re smart, and girl, you’re beautiful! ”

Jeez.

Hailey could not help the embarrassed giggle that escaped as she tried to break free, shaking her head.

“The rest of them just don’t know you like I do…yet.” Juliana finally let her go. “But I promise you, once they get to know you and you get to know them, you’ll see.”

She skipped to her car and threw open the door.

“You’ll see they’re not that bad.”

I guess.

A car pulled up nearby, interrupting the conversation.

“Juelz!” Gunner’s voice spun Hailey around, and the butterflies returned in force.

“Gunner!” Juliana yelled, hugging him through the driver’s side window.

“You ready to do this?”

“Absolutely! I can’t wait to see the look on my brother’s face!”

What’s going on?

Hailey took a step closer as Juliana jumped into his car.

“Hey, Hailey.”

Just hearing her name come out of his mouth raised the hair on her arms.

Pull yourself together.

“Hi.” It came out much softer than she would have liked. “What’s going on? What are you going to tell your brother, Juliana? ”

She was struggling to fight off a new tug that had entered her chest.

“We’re going to Tony D’s for a little after-game celebration.” Her friend snickered and punched Gunner in the shoulder. “To recruit.”

“Recruit?” Hailey came even closer.

“Just a little something Juelz thought of.”

Gunner leaned out the window, and his face was illuminated by the parking lot’s lights.

Oh, wow, he is gorgeous.

“Want to come?” His central Pennsylvania accent made her think more words were following, leading to a short, awkward silence.

“Oh, sorry, I can’t.”

He nodded, but his smile lingered.

“I understand. Last minute, but maybe next time?”

Her cheeks were starting to burn.

“I just---I have to get home to my dad and---”

He put his hand up and chuckled.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll take a raincheck. Just rest up for practice on Monday.”

Practice...

He leaned over to speak to Juliana, and that new tug strengthened.

What is going on with me?

She realized she was feeling a jolt of jealousy, and she could not control it. She knew those two were just friends. Juliana had been very vocal about her relationship with Andy Green. This seemed to be known by everyone except her brother; Hailey was fairly sure he would kill Andy if he found out. But as she glanced into the car again, she could not help but wish she were the one in the passenger seat.

This is not good.

Just a few days ago, she was cursing his name, and now she wanted to be in the car next to him. The butterflies were back.

“And if you’re not busy, you should stop by tomorrow for the fundraiser.” His smirk widened as he shifted the car into drive. “It should be fun.”

He started to roll up the window, a more playful tone entering into his voice.

“Plus.” He stopped the window. “I think everyone would love to meet the girl who’s going to be the lead.”

The lead.

The car shot out of the parking lot.

Right.

Her legs were beginning to feel weak again as she walked back to her car and threw herself up against it. There were no longer butterflies in her stomach, just knots, and she was starting to feel sick.

I am going to be the lead.