Page 11

Eleven

Unable to truly untangle my potential feelings for Connor, I wanted to go on my next date as soon as possible so I could at least move on from my disastrous date with Davis.

But Amanda had yet to set a time and place.

She’d told me that my next suitor was my age, although he’d skipped a couple grades and was finishing up his freshman year at Princeton.

He’s excited , she reassured me, but asked to wait until the semester ends.

He has a mountain of essays and exams.

So, I had to wait a couple weeks, already knowing from Marco that Princeton’s finals didn’t end until mid-May.

Ironically, there was a chance I’d unknowingly run into my date before then, because my Princeton visit was upon us.

I skipped school on a Thursday in late April, excited to be an unofficial member of Princeton’s field hockey team for the next couple days.

“Now, Mads, we know where your loyalties lie,” Da said when we were about five minutes away from campus.

“This family loves Penn, but please go into this weekend with a wide-open mind. Consider Princeton for Princeton .”

Princeton’s head coach, despite not using any exclamation points in her emails, seemed nice.

She greeted us in the athletic department’s lobby, smiling warmly as handshakes were exchanged before leading us to her office to go over the weekend’s agenda.

A girl with a blond ponytail sat in one of the chairs.

I recognized her right away: Shelly Freeman.

She had been Princeton’s standout freshman this past season and would be my host for the next couple days.

After we left the office, Shelly walked at a fast clip, and I kept my head on a swivel while trying to keep up with her.

Spring had officially sprung on the Princeton campus; its dramatic Gothic architecture spiraled into the blue sky, far above the trees that burst green, white, and pink.

Students had spread blankets out on one of the lush lawns, and there wasn’t a free spot to be had on any of the benches.

We speed walked across campus until we reached Shelly’s dormitory.

It was gorgeous, looking like an old estate house—or a vintage hotel, even.

Three stories tall, the entrance was white clapboard with soaring white columns and black-shuttered windows, and on each side of this already-incredible entrance were two stone wings, windows flung open to the fresh air.

Dormer windows popped out of the roof, as well as four sturdy brick chimneys.

A red and white FORBES COLLEGE banner hung from the third-floor balcony.

“Wow,” I whispered.

Shelly hummed, the polite equivalent of clearing her throat.

“Would you like me to turn all tour guide on you and recount its history?” she asked.

“Or should we both say it’s beautiful and head up to my room?”

“Oh, um…” I said, a little taken aback.

She hadn’t sounded rude, just unexpectedly direct.

“I’m cool with seeing your room.”

Truthfully, I did want to know about Forbes’s origin story.

But I could tell Shelly had no genuine interest in telling me, and it probably would be more informative (and amusing) hearing it from Simon, Marco’s friend who spoke like he was from a distant era.

“Get ready for two flights of stairs,” Shelly warned as I unlocked my phone and texted a group chat I’d dubbed The Princetonians .

Marco had set it up for whatever reason after I’d crashed their dinner at Ember his blond hair was plastered to his forehead from sweat, but he was cute.

Warm brown eyes and dimples in both cheeks.

“Hey, Shelly,” he said, beer in hand.

“What’s up?”

Shelly introduced me, and Derek drained his drink so he could ask me to dance.

“Stay away from Marco,” Shelly hissed in my ear before I took Derek’s hand.

Huh? I thought, blinking to make sure this wasn’t a dream—or a nightmare .

This night was becoming so twisted; the field hockey girls had scattered, and now, Shelly was telling me to back off from Marco?

Marco? “Shelly, no,” I started.

“Marco and I, we’re—”

Her next words were like knives.

“Fuck off, Madeline. Fuck the hell off.”

Derek overheard us.

“Yikes,” he said, then slipped his arms around my waist as if to hold me back from Shelly.

“I know we’re in TI, but there’s no need for a cat fight, ladies.”

“Stay out of it, Derek,” Shelly grumbled.

“Gladly!” he chirped, then leaned down and whispered, “Do you still wanna dance?”

By way of an answer, I shook and shimmied myself out of his arms so I could take his hand and tug him deeper into the haze of people.

Maybe Marco would ask where I’d gone; maybe he wouldn’t.

But I didn’t want to be anywhere near Shelly while they figured out their shitty situationship—or, even better, their “shituationship.”

We’ll find each other later , I assured myself.

I’ll find the others later.

I ignored the prickling at the back of my neck, telling me that I should find them now .

Instead, I closed my eyes, felt my heart flicker at Derek’s warm hands on my hips, and started to dance.

***

Please pick up , I thought, shivering in the chilly night air.

Tiger Inn’s tropical weather had worn off entirely.

Please pick up, please pick up, please—

“Hello?” Austin said groggily.

“Mads?”

At the sound of his voice, hot and heavy tears spilled down my cheeks.

“Austin,” I croaked.

“Austin, hey. I need to talk to you. I know it’s really late, but…” I swallowed, then repeated, “I know it’s really late.”

“Really late?” My brother laughed softly, still half asleep.

“Try almost two a.m.” He yawned.

“Just be quiet, okay? Katie’s a light sleeper.”

“Okay,” I agreed, but then did the complete opposite of staying quiet.

I openly started sobbing.

Sobbing in my stupid excuse for a shirt and drenched in sweat and Unicorn Snot and wearing enough eye makeup that it was probably running in rivulets down my face right about now.

This girl , passersby would think, is having a night.

I could tell Austin’s spine straightened from the sound of his voice.

“Mads, what’s going on? Where are you? Princeton, right? This is your Princeton weekend?”

I nodded, even though he couldn’t see, and then word-vomited up the whole night.

“The field hockey girls totally ditched me, and Shelly won’t answer my calls or texts,” I said over the lump in my throat.

“And I can’t go back to her room…”

“You have to go back to her room,” Austin said firmly.

“Right now.”

“But she hates me!” I wailed at the same time a muffled voice went, “Austin, is everything alright?”

“Not really,” he told Katie.

Freaking Katie. “Mads is at Princeton…”

“Oh my god ,” I heard her groan, loud and clear, after he recapped my recap.

“Are you kidding me? She didn’t call your parents?”

My blood burned.

I wanted to call my brother , I thought.

I wanted to call my best friend, the person I can always count on for help.

I doubted I would ever say that about Katie.

Whatever Austin said was hushed, definitely drowned out by him pressing his phone against his chest.

And then, a beat later, Katie’s voice came over the line: “Where exactly are you?”

“Wawa,” I answered.

“I didn’t know where to go after leaving the party, but I knew Wawa would be open—”

“Okay,” she cut me off.

“Here’s Austin.”

“Do you have your pepper spray?” he asked.

“No,” I said, goose bumps creeping up my arms. “I dropped it at the party.” My voice quavered.

“I, um, used it at the party—”

“What?!” Austin and Katie both shouted.

I was, it appeared, on speakerphone.

“I was dancing with this guy,” I explained.

“It was fun at first…” I remembered how good Derek’s hands felt on me, how his warm breath tickled the tip of my ear.

My body was humming, a sensation that made it easy to ignore his slurred words or running his hands over places I didn’t quite want them.

“But then things took a turn when he told me he hoped I’d be his number three.”

“He didn’t ,” Austin ground out as Katie said, “What does that mean?”

“Three girls in one night.” I couldn’t help but blubber again.

“You kiss one, kiss another, and then take the third home .”

“Ah,” was Katie’s only comment.

“And then,” I told Austin, “I stopped dancing, and he asked what was wrong, so I said I didn’t want to go home with him. He tried to kiss me, and I pushed him away, but he followed me off the dance floor and wouldn’t leave me alone. Shelly and the other girls were nowhere. He offered to walk me back to the dorm, but once he put his hands on me again… I sprayed him when he tried to stop me on the stairs.” I reached up to rub my eyes.

“Then I made a run for it.”

My brother’s voice was almost cold.

“Call Da and Dad, Mads. Call them while you walk back to Shelly’s dorm.”

“Austin, I—”

“Mads?”

I spun around to see Marco longboarding across the parking lot.

He wasn’t in his State Night spirit wear anymore, just wearing a pair of sweats and a PRINCETON SOCCER pullover with cheeks pink from the cold.

I gritted my teeth. Half of me wanted to hug him, so relieved he was here, but the other half wanted to punch him.

“Marco?”

“Wait, álvarez?” Austin asked.

“Put Marco on the phone.”

They didn’t speak for long.

I could hear Austin yelling, but I couldn’t decipher what he was yelling.

Marco did a lot of solemn nodding.

“I’m going to walk you back to Forbes,” he said after hanging up and handing my phone back to me.

He jerked his head to Wawa.

“We can get an Icee first?”

“An Icee sounds good,” I said.

“But Forbes doesn’t.”

Marco sighed.

“Mads…”

“They left me there, Marco.” My voice jumped an octave.

“ Everyone left me there, but Shelly also abandoned me. Your whatever-you-call-her is supposed to watch out for me while I’m here, but instead decided to blow off all my calls and texts when I needed help. I’m not going to go have a slumber party with her after that.”

“You won’t need to,” he said.

“She’s not…” He trailed off and ran his hand through his hair.

Awkwardly.

“Mmm,” I said.

“Got it.”

Shelly was not in her room.

She was in Marco’s room, probably all snuggled up in his toasty-warm bed waiting for him to return with the late-night goodies he’d clearly come here to collect.

Whatever, I thought, feeling pinpricks at the corners of my eyes.

If Marco wants to be with a girl like Shelly, what-fucking-ever.

Marco gently mentioned Forbes again, but I barely heard him, busy texting someone.

I’ll call my parents now , Katie wrote back.

Austin wants Marco to walk you there.

Not necessary , I said, Katie’s childhood truth or dare game on my mind.

Sneaking out of her house at midnight and walking to Wawa when she was only thirteen.

I was seventeen; it would be a piece of cake.

You were alone when you did it.

But I was still scared , she wrote.

Have Marco walk you.

I sighed, then looked at Marco.

“You can take me somewhere,” I said miserably.

“But it’s not Forbes.”