Page 20 of A Dangerous Heart (Wind River Mail-Order Brides #4)

Clare saw the words hit their mark, causing a minute tightening around Isaac’s eyes. She knew Ben had been upset last night after she’d told them they would need to pack up their stuff in the morning.

Isaac’s eyes met hers briefly, and for a fraction of a second, the hard edge in his expression softened. “He can’t have gone far in the dark. We’ll find him.”

The quiet strength in his voice and his use of we were her undoing. The tears she’d been holding at bay all morning broke free. Embarrassed, she bowed her head. Isaac’s hand closed over her elbow. The comforting touch only lasted a moment, but it bolstered her.

He turned to Eli. “Can you find your way to the main homestead?”

“I think so.”

“I know you can. You love your brother, and he needs your help. Find Drew or Nick. Tell them to head up here and help us search. Clare and I will search to the north.”

Eli ran off on foot, while Isaac led Clare up the small rise near the river.

“How far up this way did you search?” Isaac asked. He was setting a fast pace, and she panted as she tried to keep up with him. Clare scanned the brush and rocky hills. The sun was up now, but the day was gray. Dark, angry clouds were moving in from the west.

“Ben!” she called out.

Isaac pointed out a partial boot print. Expression determined, he pushed them onward. The tree line began to thin and gave way to rocky terrain as they headed upland through a deep ravine.

Clare’s boots skidded on some loose gravel, and a few pebbles rolled down the ravine. Her mind wound round and round like the trail Isaac was trekking up the rocky face.

The silence between them became unbearable.

“I couldn’t sleep last night,” she blurted.

Isaac pulled a branch aside for her, not looking back to see if she was through.

“You were right,” she went on stubbornly.

He didn’t have to look at her to listen.

“I should have told you the whole truth from the beginning.” She panted through the words. Her chest hurt, not only from the pace.

“I was desperate. To escape.” New tears welled in her eyes. She blinked them away and kept looking for Ben.

Isaac’s longer strides put him several feet ahead of her. She drew in a breath, picked up her pace.

“I’m sorry that I put your family in danger.” When he still didn’t acknowledge her, desperation made her shout, “I had no choice. I had to get us out this time.”

Now he swung around, eyes searching her face. “You’ve tried to get out before?”

Here is your moment of truth, Clare Barlow. You can play it two ways. Tell the truth, and Isaac will know that you were a charlatan. Or…keep it from him and hope he never finds out.

Blood will out.

No, she would out herself. Just reveal the whole ugly truth about the woman she used to be.

“After my oldest brother died, my father needed someone to scout ahead. Get the lay of the land, meet people, and sniff out any vulnerabilities. When the bank might be left unlocked. Who had the keys or knew the safe combination.”

Clare watched Isaac’s jaw harden and his eyes go cold.

“I told myself I wasn’t hurting anyone. Only gathering information.”

But she’d known it was wrong. She cleared her throat, the guilt and shame rising to choke her again. She swallowed it back, determined to get it all out.

“Sometimes Pa and Vic would come home with wads of cash, and for a while, things would be good. They’d spend it all on fine saddles or whatever they could think of—anything but providing for the family.

” She shook her head, the words coming faster now.

“And they’d be gone for months at a time, leaving us to fend for ourselves. ”

She paused, remembering the days when there had been no food to go around, the silence hanging heavy as Anne grew more ill with the children to care for and no one there to help. “Anne was growing weaker by the day. I could get us food and supplies while in town.”

She sucked in a breath. Her heart beat faster with the memory of her pa and his demands. “And you don’t say no to Pa Barlow.” She didn’t realize she was touching the scar at her wrist until she caught him watching her. She dropped her hands to her sides.

Surely he couldn’t think any less of her than he already did, but she couldn’t bear any more of his censure, so she ducked her eyes, turning to pick her way up the gully, leaving him to follow this time.

“I was seventeen when I met a young man in this tiny town in southern Missouri. A banker’s son. I’d never known anyone so kindhearted.”

Theo had been a complete surprise to her after Pa, Billy, and Victor. At times his gentleness hadn’t felt real. She’d imagined herself in love with him before she’d known what love really meant.

“I thought I could outsmart Pa and Victor. Hatched a grand plan to run away with Theo.”

When she glanced over her shoulder, Isaac paused his searching for Ben to meet her gaze. She saw the resignation in his expression. He’d guessed.

“Pa caught us and laughed in my face. He knocked me to the ground and quoted one of his favorite phrases—one he’d been repeating to me ever since I was Ben’s age: ‘Blood will out.’ He told Theo that I was pulling a con.

And Theo, the man who’d declared his undying love for me?

” She released a derisive laugh and shook her head.

“He believed Pa—that I was still in cahoots with them. I saw the doubt and distaste in his eyes.”

She lifted her scarred arm. “My father left me with a little reminder of what happens when you cross him.”

Isaac’s lips flattened, then he motioned her on, taking the lead again. Surely Ben couldn’t have climbed this far. His tone deepened when he asked, “What happened to the banker’s son?”

“Pa and Victor beat him to within an inch of his life.”

She’d ignored the warning signs—the little voice inside that had told her she was putting them all in danger. She’d kept telling herself it would be fine. But then Isaac had said it out loud, and now she couldn’t stop thinking about it. He was right. She was a Barlow, and trouble always found her.

Isaac was stepping over a fallen tree trunk when he froze, eyes focused on the ground. In the moist dirt near the log, a small divot was pressed into the dark soil. A boy’s boot heel.

“Ben!” Isaac shouted.

They waited. No response. Just the twitter of a few birds and the sound of rushing water in the distance. Isaac kept climbing. Her heart pumped double time, but she could only manage shallow breaths. Were they close? She tripped over a half-buried root and lurched forward.

Isaac turned in time to break her fall. She clutched his shoulders when he would have let her go, couldn’t tear her eyes away from the face that had somehow become so dear to her. She couldn’t let Victor get anywhere near Isaac or his family. It would be Theo all over again.

“You’re right. We can’t say here. If Victor finds us, he’ll bring violence against your family. As soon as we find Ben, we’ll leave. I couldn’t…I couldn’t stand it if something happened to Drew or Kaitlyn or the kids.”

Or you.

His fingers tightened around her upper arms. A steely glint sparked in his eyes. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”

“It’s not your problem. I can’t let you?—”

He dipped his face closer. “I’m making it my problem.” His voice came out low and raspy.

“What about your family?” She tried one last time, but he was immovable.

“They’d say the same thing. We may not be blood, but McGraws don’t run from outlaws.”