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“I’m scared of all of this.” I admitted. “I’m afraid I won’t be me anymore. That the vampire will take over and Morgan will disappear.”

“I get that. First few weeks, I kept looking for my heartbeat. Kept forgetting it wasn’t there anymore.” He tapped his chest. “Empty. Silent. On my soul, it freaked me the fuck out.”

“How did you get over that?” I struggled to find the words.

“Father, Zand told me I was going to get something that felt like a heartbeat over time if I continued to drink blood. He said something about vampirism being a virus that mutated over the years. He said old vampires don’t have a heartbeat but all the newly made ones like us do.”

That was something I didn’t know. Harlen said my heartbeat would come back, but he didn’t say anything about a virus or that some vampires don’t have one.

“I really don’t know anything about being a vampire.”

“It’s a learn as you go type of deal. Give it some time.” Donté’s young ass was schooling me.

“Time seems to be all we have.”

“We still can die. It’s just harder to kill us, so we gotta keep our head on a swivel.”

“I’ll remember that.”

“Dead ass, I’m high-key happy father made me. He gave my Black ass a do over. He showing me a different lifestyle. As a vampire, I can have a life without poverty. I don’t have to worry about the police fucking with me. No drive-by shootings, no more gangbanging, burying dead homies, or killing other YNsthat look like me. Now I got a father. I never had one before, not around me. Didn’t even grow up with one. My real daddy went to jail when I was three. I don’t even remember his ass. I was just another YN being raised by a single mom that was working hard to feed me and house me just so I could do all the wrong things. I know Zand isn’t my real father, but he my father in every way that matters. On God, being a vampire is better than my old fucked up life.”

“Well damn, Donté, that’s an origin story.” Another wave of bloodlust hit me. I shut my eyes tight and clawed at my stomach.

“Gee, drink the blood.” Donté’s eyes moved over to the glass of blood sitting right beside me, the one he brought with him.

I glanced over at the glass on the nightstand. He didn’t have to tell me twice. I picked that bad boy up and tilted it to my lips. I drank it down until there was only a mask of red smeared on the inside of the glass. I gently placed the glass down on the nightstand. I fought the urge to place my finger in the glass. Dig out what little was left. And suck it off my fingers.

“That actually helped.” I said, surprised at how much better I instantly felt.

“Gee, don’t starve yourself. My father has an endless supply. He got all the blood types.”

I never even thought about different blood types. What type did I just drink? It was del-lish.

“I got a question for you.” I asked.

“What’s up?”

“Did you ever...” I hesitated, uncertain how to phrase the question. “Did you ever hurt anyone? After you were turned?”

He understood me right away. “I haven’t hurt anyone as a vampire. But I hurt a lot of people when I was human.” Donté’s eyes changed. They were filled with regret. His life was better now that he was a vampire. I feared the same wouldn’t be for me.

“I’m afraid I will hurt someone. I know I’m stronger and faster. And then the hunger. I don’t want to attack anybody.”

“We can hurt people without meaning to. But you got all these people around you to help you through the early parts of being a vampire. It’s only been three days, and you doing good if you ask me. Don’t overthink it.”

“I don’t feel in control.” I admitted. “I feel like I’m hanging on by my fingernails.”

“Gee, that’s control. And your nails are fire.” He said and bucked his eyes like I was slow. I mean, okay, I get it. I’m new to the vampire family, but could he stop calling me gee?

“Did you ever go back to see your family after you turned?” I asked.

“Nah, when I died in the hospital, that was it. Father told me if I wanted this new life, I couldn’t go back to my old one. Everybody knows that I died. Your family doesn’t know you died. You can act like nothing happened.”

“Yeah, you’re tight. But don’t you miss your mother?”

“Yeah, fo’ sure, but she better off without me. I was a bad influence on my little brother and my cousins. All I did was cause my mama problems. I know she good. She moved to Ohio to stay with her sister. It worked out for her and my brother.”

A comfortable silence settled between us. For the first time since waking up to this new existence, I didn’t feel completely alone. Donté had walked this path before me. He survived it. He seemed to be still himself. I didn’t know him before, so that was an odd thing to think. He actually might be better than he was before because he pretty much described himself as a violent youthful offender with his origin story.