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Her eyes flash as she looks at me. At least there’s still life in them. “Are you serious? Am I alright? With watching two brothers be executed in front of their mother? Being nearly swallowed into a mob of violent, bloodthirsty brutes? No. No, I’m not alright.”

“This is what we’re trying to change.”

“How? Now that the books have been burned? Where can we go? How can we change the traditions of brutality that are so ingrained in your society?”

“I’m not sure yet but?—”

“Commander?” Mydax’s voice crackles through the speakers. “We have a problem.”

Fuck.

“What kind of problem?” I immediately stand and walk behind Vynia’s chair, so I’m closer to the controls.

“The Order is here, and they want Neev.”

CHAPTER33

NEEV

* * *

My heart drops as I hear the news over the comms system. They came for me. I’m not surprised, but I am sad. This forces me into making a decision at the worst possible time. I believe Raiz that he had no plans to be with that female.

I still trust him.

It just hurt. It hurt so much more than I was expecting. It felt like getting stabbed and then having the knife twisted.

Despite feeling like I’ve known him my entire life, we only just met. Today just served as a wakeup call to not give myself away so easily. Maybe it’s a sign that I should think a little more carefully about what I’m doing instead of jumping straight into things.

Hyva sits down next to me, his shoulder brushing mine and giving me just a little bit of grounding support. He doesn’t ask me any questions, he just stays with me while Raiz picks up a headset and speaks quietly into it. I’m sure he’s giving instructions to Mydax.

“Did you guys think they’d come for me?” I ask Hyva.

“They’d be stupid not to come for you. Honestly, it took them longer than I thought it would.”

“You guys did kidnap me from my bed.”

“That we did. Well, I didn’t encourage the idea. It goes against my oath as a doctor.”

We fall into a comfortable silence. I wonder who came to retrieve me. Am I going to go back with them? I could just walk away. After the horrifying experience of the Bak’hura, I don’t think anyone would blame me.

“How long until we reach the ship?” I ask.

“Forty-seven minutes,” Altis answers.

“Forty-seven minutes to decide your future,” Hyva says quietly. “Tick tock.”

“Stars, Hyva.” I ram my shoulder into his. “But you’re not wrong.”

I want to stay. I look over at Raiz and wonder if I could actually leave him. Just the thought guts me.

But then maybe that’s why I should leave. I can’t go from the structure of the Order to jumping into the arms of the first male that shows interest, right? Even if it feels better than anything I’ve experienced.

Not that I want to return to my life on Oculus Nine. I know that for a fact. Having seen a tiny slice of the galaxy outside the glass walls I was raised within, I know I want more. I want to explore, meet people, see new things. I won’t do that locked away in my library office on the Eye.

Raiz sets the headset down and clenches his jaw. I watch as he paces back and forth several times, both hands raking through his hair as he closes his eyes. He finally stops and crosses to me, kneeling in front of me and placing his hands over my thighs.

“Leave,” he orders Hyva, who gets up and walks to speak with the twins, giving Raiz and I some semblance of privacy. “The choice is yours. They’re going to want to take you back, but you don’t have to go. You can stay with us. We can take you somewhere else, anywhere you want to go. I have enough credits to get you set up anywhere in the galaxy. I’ll give you anything you want or need.”