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“You’re just now getting that?”
“Not that you have a right to be jealous or that I need to give you an explanation, but Sal is my friend.” Riley plays with the hem of her dress. “I don’t have a lot of those.” Her words come out in a soft whisper, so light that I almost miss them.
Her words make my chest ache, making me wish I could make it better for her. I want to kick myself in the ass for ever being rude to her.
“That makes two of us.”
I want to tell her that she has me now. That I’ll be whatever she needs me to be for the rest of her life. But I know she’s not ready for all of that yet. To be honest, I haven’t even wrapped my head around it. Instead, I reach over and grab her hand, giving it a little reassuring squeeze, letting her know she is not alone.
I make a vow to myself at this moment that the only tears I’ll ever put in her eyes are ones of joy from this day forward.
8
RILEY
Istare at myself in the mirror as I brush my hair out. My mind keeps thinking back to Friday night at the bar and all the gorgeous women who fluttered around the room with graceful beauty. I suck my cheeks in, wondering if they're so full because I still have some babyface left, or if it's because I'm a little chubby. I lean in, staring at the freckles that sprinkle across my nose. I don't think there is ever a chance I'll look like that Abby girl. She is all woman.
“I look like a young girl.” I huff a breath, tossing my brush down on the counter.
When I walk out of my bathroom, I’m surprised to see Nikolai sitting on my bed. He’s in his signature black jeans and shirt. I’m guessing it’s his favorite color since he’s always wearing it. I notice he’s got my computer sitting in his lap. I can hear him clicking away on it. What the heck?
“What are you doing?” I haven’t seen him since Friday night. He brought me home, and the rest was kind of fuzzy. I could have sworn he lay down with me in bed, but when I woke up, he wasn’t there. I thought it might have been a dream.
“You don’t look like a girl.”
“What?” He glances up from my laptop.
“With your curves, Riley, you don’t look like a girl.” My face flushes. Crap, he heard me.
“You could knock.” I walk over and take the laptop from him, closing it. “You could also respect someone’s privacy.”
“I could do a lot of things.” Nikolai’s eyes rake down my body and back up, reminding me I’m only in my underwear and an oversized shirt. “All the colleges you are applying to are states away.” He doesn’t sound too happy about it. I should know, I’m an expert in that tone coming from him.
“You looked through my stuff?” I hold the laptop to my chest.
“There are a lot of good universities around here.” Nikolai has a way of never answering my questions.
“I don’t know where I’ll get in, so the point is moot.” I put my laptop on the charger next to my bookbag so that I'll remember to grab it in the morning.
“Come here.” I should tell him no. Ask why he can just do dirty things to my body and then disappear, then pop back up. Not only in my room but in my bed. My room, which is bigger than some people's apartments, feels small with him in it.
Instead of saying no, I go to him. I'm frustrated with myself for doing it, yet it doesn't deter me. I’m drawn to him. My curiosity also gets the best of me. I have been wondering how things would be between him and me after Friday.
“Sit.” He doesn’t wait for me to do it. He grabs my hips, pulling me down next to him.
“You’re bossy,” I mutter.
“So you’ve told me.” His mouth edges upwards. It is not enough to show me that dimple again. I like seeing it. For a split second, Nikolai actually appears to be his age. “Your knees.” I tense up.
“I told you. I fell.” He’s like a damn dog with a bone about my injury.
“There’s more.”
“It doesn’t matter.” I stand. Nikolai's hand locks around my wrist before I can try to move farther away from him.
“I’ll find out one way or another.” His thumb drifts back and forth on my skin before he releases his hold on me and stands. “Sleep tight.”
Nikolai drops a kiss on top of my head before walking back out of my bedroom. I fall back onto the bed. That man is so confusing. It’s messing with my head. It doesn't help that every time I crawl under the covers to sleep, I dream about his mouth being on me again. Unfortunately, my stupid alarm goes off right when it gets to the good part.