Page 140

We both feel our little one.

We smile at each other.

The movie ends.

I’m back to the present. In the city. Dark clouds. Impending rain.

I’m in hell.

“Soon,” she whispers, staring up at me. “When we’re out of here. When we find someplace safe to stay. Please. You have to understand.”

The images linger there, in the back of my mind.

It’s mine, that movie. That life.

“No, Shiloh. I don’t understand.”

Eleven years was a hell of a long time to wait. I did it because I had to. I’ll never regret it.

I’ll never regret this, either.

“Open up. Wider.”

“I love you.”

“Open. Up.”

She relents, sighing as she leans on my knee with one hand.

“Good girl.” I shove my fingers all the way down her throat. It clenches around me. She’s scratching me through my jeans as I increase the pressure. “Alas, you’ve earned this punishment, Shi. This one’s all on you. You need to learn the hard way just how protective I am of not just you but our future babies. Do you see that now? Do you understand whatI’mtrying to tellyou?”

Her spit dribbles down my wrist. I curl my fingers, coaxing more gagging sounds out of her.

“Let it out.” With my hand threaded in her hair, I push her lower. Rub her sweet, hot throat over and over and over.

That first heave is precious. She wretches hard. Spitting and coughing water down my hand. Soaking my sleeve.

“Good girl.”

I rub on the back of her throat, forcing another heave out of her.

This one gets me what I’m after.

The half-digested pill rests there, on my sleeve. White on top of black.

The throbbing in my head is replaced by instant relief.

“Good girl. You’re such a good girl.” I take Shiloh in my arms as she gasps for air, sit on the ground, and cradle her in my lap. “You did so well.”

“We’ll regret this,” she says, her arms hanging around my neck. Her head rests on my shoulder. “If it happens, if I get pregnant, we’ll live to regret it.”

She knows about my plan in broad strokes. What she doesn’t know is that the authorities will never come searching for us. I’ll tell her about it later. Soothe her when it suits me.

She’s scared. Panicked. Her rippling fear gets my cock hard and my blood thrumming in my veins.

I’m a bastard.

She loves me, anyway.