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“Do you seriously have to tell your father about tonight?”

Yes, I was pleading, but I wasn’t in the habit of announcing my romantic exploits to others. If I got congratulations flowers from Paul and his mates tomorrow, I was going to spell Farley’s mouth shut.

“I don’t want to be rude to Dad. He’d tell me if he was going to be away overnight.”

“Would he? Because I don’t think so. I think he’d sneak away from his petri dishes and enjoy his booty call without anyone ever knowing. I think he’d pretend he went for a walk and fell asleep in a field.”

Farley’s newest trick was simply ceasing to argue. He kissed me, lovingly patted my bottom, growled a little because he liked it, and then headed out of the kitchen so I could make Queen Elsbeth’s tea.

“Bare necessities,” I repeated with a snort. “I wish I’d thought of that.

But if I had, then I would be the one getting the lecture on homophones. That would have been both bad and boring.

14

I returned to the basement and found Jezel leaning against the wall of the cage. The door was open. When she saw me carrying the tea tray, a table instantly appeared for me to set it down on.

“If you could materialize, I would happily serve you tea and cookies too, Jezel.”

“No need to worry about me. I remember precisely what tea tastes like and can recall it any time I wish. Being one with the inn also allows me to live vicariously through its guests.”

Queen Elsbeth smiled as I poured her tea and put in the honey and almond milk.

“It doesn’t make it taste like almonds, but there is a bit of a nutty taste.”

She cautiously sipped the hot brew. “Delicious,” she pronounced. “Jezel and I have been having the most marvelous talk. She’s been alive almost as long as I have.”

Jezel looked at me. “Like you, Queen Elsbeth considers me prudish as well.”

“I never said you were prudish. I simply said things are different now. Women freely exercise their choices. Many live as only men were allowed to do back in your day.”

Queen Elsbeth softly cackled as she sipped her tea. “I suggested to her that humans have so many rules about love and sex because of the great pleasure they get in breaking them. The forbidden can be so much more fun.”

I waved my hand—no wand needed for this magic—and the other chair from the parlor appeared. I lowered myself into it and smiled. “I’ve never denied myself a lover or a friend. People think I should stay mad at Peace forever just because she slept with my ex-boyfriend once. But that’s about timing. I was done with Ethan, but hadn’t broken things off yet. She gave me good reason.”

I looked at Jezel. “And don’t ask me again what I would do if the male were Farley. As a fellow witch, you know I would turn her into some hideous creature for revenge.”

“Peace has a good heart.”

“Yes, she does.”

“Yet you turned her into a centaur,” Queen Elsbeth said with a grin.

“I did that to thwart your daughter’s evil plans.”

“Margotta is not evil—far from it—though the jury is still out on her secondborn. Margotta is what you humans refer to as a plane mother.”

“Plane mother?” I asked.

Queen Elsbeth looked at Jezel. “Did I get that modern saying wrong?”

Jezel snorted. “I have no idea. Modern jargon makes so little sense to me that I don’t bother learning it. Plus, it never stops changing. I’m tired of trying to accommodate stupidity.”

I grinned at Jezel’s rant. “I’m sure I must frustrate you daily.”

“More like hourly,” Jezel said.

I looked at Queen Elsbeth. “What I think you mean is that your daughter is a helicopter parent.”