Page 49

His touch is the spark I’ve been waiting for to bring me back to life. For so long I’ve been on auto-pilot, just existing. Trying my hardest not to feel, as being numb is the only thing that’s helped me survive every day for the last few years. Yet, onetouch from Evan, and it’s like someone has used a defibrillator to shock me back into existence.

There’s a part of me that wants to pull away. I’ve spent so long trying not to feel, it’s almost scary to feel so much from such an innocent touch. But I’ve never made a good choice where Evan Doughty is concerned. When I should pull away and protect my heart, I hold on tighter.

He looks down at our joined hands, his eyes just as wide and confused as mine. But he doesn’t let go either. In fact, he holds on a little tighter as he pulls me towards the house.

We don’t even reach the door before it’s thrown open and literal chaos pours out. I’ve known the Doughtys for a long time, and they’ve always been loud, boisterous, and a little fucking crazy. But now they’ve expanded by almost double…and it’s even worse.

Each sibling appears to have a partner now, and some of them even have children. They still all talk over one another at once, each person getting louder to try to be heard. It’s chaos, and I can’t differentiate one voice over the others.

It’s Declan who whistles loudly, grabbing everyone’s attention as they all fall silent. “Can we please be quiet and get inside? It’s cold out here.”

Everyone looks down at the little girl in his arms, and I’m a little surprised she’s been able to continue sleeping through all the fucking noise. Slowly, everyone retreats into the house, and Dec follows them in. Evan stays still beside me. I look over at him, wondering if he’s waiting for me to go first. He appears to be focused on breathing slowly, his eyes closed.

When he opens them, his emerald-green eyes latch onto mine, and I’m shocked by the intensity I see reflecting back. “We should go in,” he mutters, though that looks to be the last thing he wants to do.

“Are you okay?” I ask, wincing as the words come out.

What a stupid fucking question. It’s been a really long bloody day, and he clearly doesn’t look okay.

“My family can be a lot sometimes,” he replies, shrugging his shoulders.

I let out a small laugh that’s bordering on a snort. “I remember. Though they appear to have gotten a little worse.”

He groans, but I can see the hint of a smile there. “So much worse. There’s more of them now. We’re multiplying quicker than a bloody virus,” he grumbles, and I can’t help but laugh again.

His eyes sparkle and his lips pull into an even bigger grin as he watches me. For a second, I feel a little self-conscious. I can’t even remember the last time I laughed like this. Like a genuine laugh that tumbled out without permission.

Shit, has it really been that long?

“Come on. I’ll protect you,” I joke, winking at him as I pull him towards the house.

In a flash, the smiling version of Evan vanishes, and the stern, closed-off mask he wears now descends over his features. He looks blank and cold as he nods for me to lead the way. I wait for him to let go of my hand, since he’s clearly trying to distance himself from showing any emotion around me. But he doesn’t.

His eyes flick down to where our hands are clasped together, and I wait with bated breath, but it never happens. I hate how fucking relieved I am, and how much I’m already relying on his touch for comfort, to ground me in this strange new environment.

Following his non-verbal command, I lead the way into the beautiful cottage. I wish I could take in more of the decor and surroundings, but there’s too much going on. Then again, if this is where I’m going to be staying for a while, I’ve got plenty of time to look around and get used to the place.

Evan gives me directions for where to go, navigating me down the hall and through into the large open-plan living-dining room. There’s a separate kitchen off it that’s large enough to house another table, and an island surrounded by stools to act as a breakfast bar.

Inside the cottage, although there are low beams and a lot of original features, it’s decorated rather modernly, with clean lines and bright walls. There’s something incredibly homely about the place that I can’t seem to put my finger on.

I look around, trying to find any signs of Evan. Anything that suggests he might have had a hand in decorating this place, but there’s nothing. I used to joke with him whenever I was in his bedroom that it was far too clean for a teenage boy.

He never had a thing out of place, and there was barely anything personal that showed what he enjoyed. There was no games console on the side, no posters of half-naked women or bands he liked to listen to, and there were no bookshelves filled with collectables, music, or movies that he loved.

The only thing that even showed a little personality was the two photo frames beside his bed. One had a picture of us in it, and the other had one of him with his siblings when they were younger—Kellan was in it, too, as he’d just moved in with them.

It appears Evan never outgrew the habit of not showing his personality, and being obsessively clean…as this house tells me nothing at all about the guy he could be now.

Once we get into the large living room, it’s full of people. I recognise most of the Doughty family—even though they all look much older now than when I last saw them—but Evan takes the time to introduce everyone else.

No longer looking like the little girl I remember, a grown-up Ryleigh is seated on the floor with her boyfriend, Shane, and they are playing with Hallie—Kel’s daughter.

He’s sitting on the sofa, with a laptop on his knee, his very pregnant girlfriend, Mia, resting her head on his shoulder. Finn’s girlfriend, McKenna, is beside her, clutching Finn’s hand as she gives me a small smile. I sigh in relief at seeing she’s here, unharmed, and I try not to think about the last time I saw her, and how fucking helpless I felt.

On the other sofa is Freya, and her partner, Kian, who is talking to his boss, Bree. She’s sitting in the middle of the sofa, rocking a small baby in her arms while her husband, Liam, looks on, like they’re his whole world.

I almost shy away from such a tender moment taking place in front of everyone. I’ve only seen them both together at their engagement party over three years ago, and even I could see that they were made for each other. Now they have a little baby—Bree introduces him as Nate—to complete their family.