Page 35

“Very well. I suggest you stick around and see what Teigan can do. She’s just as feisty as you say you like,” he says with a smile. “Oh, and don’t forget to register with my assistant. We will need to see proof of your finances before you enter the auction. Can’t have you bidding more than we know you can afford.”

The way he says the last part, almost like he’s looking down at me, suggesting I don’t have as much money as I claim to, makes my urge to punch him grow by the second.

“We will do that,” Dec says, as he places his hand on the top of my spine, and begins to push me away toward the back of the room.

Once we’re far from others, near the bar at the other side of the room, I turn the full force of my anger on Dec. “What the fuck was that? Why, in the name of Satan’s hairy bollocks, would you suggest this?”

Dec winces at how loud I am, and he quickly looks around to check if people are staring at us. Thankfully, the bass from the music is so loud, nobody could hear me. They’re also far too distracted looking at the Lots who are wandering around like fucking show ponies.

“I’m sorry, but I thought this was the best way. He was always going to punish her. If we’re here, we can make sure he doesn’t go too far. If he did it in private, who knows how much damage he may have inflicted, and I’m guessing he doesn’t have a doctor to look her over afterward? I know this is fucking awful, but it’s the best I could think of. You don’t have to be here. You can go outside, and I will stay to make sure it doesn’t go too far,” he explains, and I fucking hate how much what he’s saying makes sense.

“Fuck,” I yell, more out of frustration than at Dec. “I’m staying. If she has to go through this, the least I can do is to be here for her.”

The thought of watching anything bad happen to Teigan makes me feel sick. Even though she’s no one to me now, in the past, I remember being the person who promised to always keep her safe. Now I’m going to stand by and allow this, without lifting a finger to help. I’ve never felt so fucking emasculated, and my stomach contents threaten to make a reappearance again.

“Lets go and register and then get a drink before it starts,” Dec says, pointing to the bar. Never have I needed fucking alcohol more. How did this become my life? I never thought I’d live in a world where I’m responsible for causing Teigan pain. Iknew it when we were teenagers, but it’s even clearer now. I’ve never been good enough for her.

All I can think about as I walk backstage is him—Evan.

What is he doing here? Did he really come to buy me?

My mind is racing as I try to distract myself from thinking about what the fuck this punishment is going to entail. No punishment is ever going to be something to look forward to, but this is such an unknown. The Sheriff has beaten me in front of an audience before, and he particularly enjoys humiliating and degrading me in front of others, but as the guy with Evan pointed out, this is a very different situation.

He wants one of the people in this room to pay a lot of money for me, and this could potentially put that at risk. If they see me do something they don’t like, if he beats me to the point it leaves marks, they may not bid on me. So, I have no idea what he’s going to do.

As I try not to think about that, Evan floats back into my head—like he ever really left. The boy I once loved is long gone…replaced by an older, surly version, who I definitely don’t recognise.

Yet, there were moments when I thought I caught a glimpse of the boy I called mine. The way his emerald-green eyes sparkle when he looks at me, or the way the tips of his ears go red when I catch him glancing at me.

Even though he’s clearly grown up, I can’t deny he looks fucking hot still. He’s a little taller, and his muscles have filled out, showing he spends more time in the gym than he used to. His hair is cut much shorter—which I’m secretly a little disappointed by, as I loved running my fingers through his locks that curled slightly at the end.

His jaw is covered with stubble that makes him look more rugged and serious. I can’t help but wonder if he still has the little dimple when he smiles.

I almost snort as I wonder if this new version of Evan even knows how to smile. He reminds me so much of his dad, and that breaks my heart. Desmond was closed off, cold, and distant, which is something I never thought Evan would become.

Then again, I can’t really talk. I’m definitely not the girl he fell in love with—his angel. She died a fucking long time ago, and the vessel left behind is just trying to survive each day.

I must have been lost in my own head since the next thing I know, one of The Sheriff's bodyguards is roughly grabbing the top of my arm, shaking me to get my attention. “Pay attention, you fucking whore. Get naked and get on stage right now. He’s waiting for you!”

I blink rapidly, trying to shove all the thoughts out of my head, so I can claw back a little control. I’ve faced punishments before, and I need to be fully in control of myself and myemotions if I want to survive this. I need to shut myself off as best I can.

Taking a few deep breaths, I concentrate on the happy place I built for myself inside my mind. It’s a technique Lilly taught me when I first met her. She has a little house inside her head that she built. Her guys are waiting for her there, and when things get too much, that’s where she goes.

I took her idea and made it my own. Mine isn’t a house, it’s a beach. It’s a warm sandy beach, with not a rock or pebble in sight. It’s private, so my footprints and the waves are the only things that disturbs the beauty. The bright blue of the sea glistens under the sparkling sun.

As I walk onto my beach, feeling the sand squishing between my toes, I listen to the cracking of the waves. I feel the warm sun beating down on my skin, warming me in a comforting way. When I reach the edge of the water, and the waves ripple over my feet, I’m comforted by the unexpected warmth of the sea.

My beach is warm, tranquil, and comforting, and those are the thoughts and feelings I hold on to as my body moves around as though on auto-pilot. I’m vaguely aware of what’s going on around me, of people speaking, but I’m so lost in my own head, the details don’t register.

I don’t remember pulling the dress over my head, removing my lingerie, or walking onto the centre of the stage. I definitely don’t even realise when I drop to my knees and assume the submissive position that’s been drilled into me. As the curtain swings open, instead of feeling the heat from the spotlights on me, and the weight of all the leery staring, all I think about is the bright sun beaming down on me.

The Sheriff addresses the crowd, and all I hear are the waves lapping over the surface of the sand, crashing against my feet. As he walks over to me, I listen to him slightly, knowing that if Idon’t follow his instructions, things will only get worse for me—all whilst keeping my body numb and my mind occupied.

“Teigan… Why don’t you tell all these lovely people here why you’re being punished tonight,” he announces loudly, holding a microphone towards me so I can respond.

When the words fall out of my mouth, I’m shocked because it doesn’t even sound like me. I’m responding on auto-pilot, and I sound so vacant. “I’m being punished because I was a bad girl.”

The Sheriff grins, and I know I said the right thing. For just a second, I consider looking out into the audience. I don’t need to look to know he’s still there. I can feel his eyes on me, and that knowledge makes my stomach clench in knots.