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It’s not a question.
I close my eyes. “Yeah. Something like that.”
It’s so embarrassing to admit it out loud, but today just confirmed it in the sickest way.
I have officially progressed beyond ‘attracted to’ Landlord Daddy and flown into obsessed-with-Archer land.
The fact that I’m thishurtover his honest, perfectly reasonable opinion shared in private with his mother proves it beyond any doubt.
“So what’s the problem?” Lyssie coaxes in that voice she has—the tone that drags my secrets out. “There is a problem, isn’t there?”
“Yes, there’s a problem.” I sigh. “He’s emotionally unavailable.”
“Oh. Oh, shit.” Lyssie sighs. “You really know how to pick them, Winnie. You’ve gotta break that pattern.”
“Tell me something I don’t know. But he’s not another Holden, at least. This guy, he’s divorced. Older. A lot of real, valid reasons to be leery of getting closer.” I pick at a loose nail before I catch myself and pin my hand down under my head. “Be honest, Lyss—how dumb am I being? On a scale of oops to chronic sponge brain?”
We won’t mention the fact that I’ve jumped in bed with him.
Some secrets are too precious to share, even if Lyssie’s BS radar probably tells her already.
“You’re not being dumb,” Lyssie says. “At least, notcrazydumb. It’s not like you slept with him or anything. Just don’t get too attached, okay?”
Yikes.
“Um, right. I think my manometer broke after the wedding,” I mumble.
“You’re not in a good headspace yet. That’s expected.Whowould be after that gross engagement lasted for so long? You haven’t really had a chance to meet normal guys yet. Nice ones, I mean.”
Right.
I think I’m broken.
Archer Rory is anything but nice and that’s the whole reason he makes me tingle.
I let out a small wail, rolling over so my face gets buried in a pillow. “How does that help? What am I supposed todo?”
“Keep your space. Be nice to yourself. Be sensible. Slow down, smell the flowers, take some walks, adopt a puppy. There are good and bad ways to get over Holden, you know.”
“Oh my God, I’m on team puppy. But I was neverintoHolden,” I hiss. “I never loved him. You know that.”
“Sure, but you still left himandyour old life behind. You’re not grieving the wedding or him. You’re mourning the old you.”
“Ugh.”
She’s too good at this.
“I know, being right all the time is hard work. You’ll buy me dinner to get me back when we hang out again.”
“Have I mentioned how much I hate your advice column?”
“All the time,” she says, a smile in her voice. I can’t help but smile back. “Look, it’s not as bad as you think it is. You’ve just had a lot going on. You’re emotionally vulnerable. So keep your guard up and put yourself first.”
I am.
And yet I also just let Archer waltz in and sweep me off my feet.
Maybe Lyssieisright.