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“You can never have too many snacks,” I said. I also had a first aid kit, enough sunscreen and bug spray for ten people, an emergency blanket and flares, and several jugs of water. Just in case. I liked being prepared.

“You ready to go?” she asked as she slammed the trunk.

“Ready if you are,” I said, putting on my sunglasses.

“Yup,” she said, coming over to give me a kiss. I couldn’t believe we were doing this. I never thought that we’d get to this place.

“Let’s go, Cricket,” she said and went to open the passenger door for her.

“After you, Ladybug.”

A few hours later, Fi was grateful for my snacks. So far, we’d stopped at two strange antique stores, taken pictures near a lighthouse, and had been nearly run off the road by exactly two vehicles. Typical.

We had taken about five dozen selfies, but I hadn’t been happy with any of them.

“I hate my hair,” I said. “It’s just so boring.” Fi thought about that.

“Turn left up here,” she said and I did it without asking why we were turning into a Walmart parking lot. I figured she had to pee.

“Come on,” she said, getting out of the car and reaching for me. I took her hand and followed her into the store. She dragged me toward the beauty department and stood me in front of the hair dye.

“Pick one.” I turned and slowly looked at her.

“You’re not serious.”

“Why not? I could cut yours if you want, too. I got pretty good at doing my own.” I didn’t know she’d cut her own hair. It looked amazing.

“I don’t know . ..” I said, my eyes blurring at all the choices.

“Close your eyes,” she said, taking my hands. “What kind of hair do you want to have, but were scared to?”

“Blue fading into purple with an undercut on one side,” I said and opened my eyes. It was the look I’d been aching for since I saw it on someone else’s Instagram.

“Okay, we’re going to need dye and bleach and clippers. And scissors so I can give you a little trim.” She stroked her fingers through my ponytail and then gave it a tiny yank.

“Ow,” I said and she kissed my cheek.

Just a mere two hours later, we were in the bathroom of the cute as hell inn we’d chosen for the night and the smell of bleach was making me feel dizzy.

“Now if it starts itching like crazy, let me know,” she said. I was nervous about this. I was skeptical. I was kind of freaking out. But I was doing it because I wanted to dosomething. I wanted to be the kind of girl who just dyed her hair. If I could pretend to be that girl, then maybe I could fake it until I became her.

To distract me from the smell of the bleach and my scalp itching, Fi danced and sang in front of me, making me laugh until I had tears streaming down my face. And I didn’t think they were a result of the bleach.

“You’re amazing,” I said and she blushed a little.

“Thanks.” We shared one of those moments when our eyes just sort of locked and everything else faded away and all I could see was her.

“Things are going to be different this time, aren’t they?” I asked.

“Yes. They are. I’m not going to let anything, least of all my own insecurities, get in the way again. We’re going to be adults and talk about things instead of making rash decisions.” I nodded.

“We’re very mature now,” I said.

“I promise you, Cricket. I promise I won’t make decisions about our relationship without talking to you first. Okay?” I reached for her hand and kissed her palm.

“I promise you the same thing, Ladybug. We’re in this together. You and me, against the world.” And our parents, probably. And distance. We hadn’t talked about that part yet, but I figured we could cross that bridge when we got back from this trip. This was a new beginning.

The timer on her phone went off and we rushed to rinse out the bleach in the huge tub before she dried my hair and put the dye on, painting the blue at my roots and mixing it with the purple that dominated the ends. I almost didn’t care what it looked like. I just wanted a change.