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“This,” I cut in, dramatically, “is Mr. Bean. The kitten. The key to Luna’s soul. The only creature in this entire godsdamned world that Lucien has willingly gifted and hasn’t tried to strangle.”

Elias perks up like I just conjured a double espresso. “You’ve had thatthingthe whole time?”

I nod solemnly, stroking Bean between the ears. “He’s a champion of naps. An agent of small, fluffy chaos. And he has survived more than half the bastards in this room.”

The little fucker mews, claws kneading into my shirt, and I swear to every divine being who’s ever hated me, I see Luna’s face soften when she looks over. Just slightly. Just enough.

She steps forward, arms crossed but eyes warm, her voice a purr laced with amusement. “You actually kept him.”

I grin.Push the bond open just enough so she feels it—how proud I am of myself.“Kept him?Protectedhim. He’s been the VIP passenger on this hell-cruise.”

Bean decides, very rudely, to leap out of my arms and onto Luna’s shoulder like I didn’t just deliver a heartfelt monologue. He curls against her neck like he owns her—like he always has—and she lets him, her fingers drifting up to scratch beneath his chin.

Lucien, naturally, says nothing. But helooks. And the smallest fucking smile—not smug, not cold, butreal—tugs at his mouth. I step back, slipping my hands into my pockets, heart thudding harder than I expected. The room still hums with magic. The pillar waits. But something in the air is… lighter now. Not safe. Not soft.

Justreal.

We’re ready.

Even Mr. Bean.

It starts as a high-pitched screech, like a soul tearing itself out of the throat of something far too invested in my existence. My name—gods help me—my actual nameechoes through the chamber in a banshee’s lilt. Drawn-out, furious, unmistakably personal.

“Silasssss.”

And I know, before I even turn, that I’ve made a terrible,terriblemistake somewhere in my history. Again. I pivot slowly, praying to every deity that’s ever ignored me that maybe—maybe—that was someone else’s name. Silas is common, right? Sort of?

It isnot.

Because there she is. Storming through the far entrance like she’s late to a bloodbath and someone’s already used her favorite knife. Hair like fire that’s mostly wrath. Eyes like she wants to carve my initials into something I value. Armor that looks like it was forged from spite and poor decisions.

Calla.

I think.

It’s been…gods, centuries? Plural? I may or may not have slept with her. May or may not have promised her a kingdom. And I may or may not have accidentally ghosted herby dying—which, to be fair, is a hard thing to avoid sometimes when you're me.

She’s still shrieking my name, each syllable like a curse. There’s a whole squadron of our exes spilling in behind her now—Sin Binders, half-dead and glowing like vengeance come home to roost. And they all lookveryinterested in one thing: me.

Elias, beside me, takes one look and wheezes out a laugh. “Didn’t you fake your death to get out of that one?”

I nod slowly, eyes still locked on Calla’s murder-glare. “I fakedthree.”

“She brought friends,” Caspian mutters, already reaching for a weapon he doesn't evenneedto look seductive.

“Itoldyou,” I hiss between my teeth, pressing closer to Luna like she might shield me with the sheer force of her cleavage, “this place is crawling with regrets.”

Calla’s closing in now, and her voice is pure venom. “You left me in a crypt in Nemedh, Silas! You said you’d be right back!”

“Iwas! It’s not my fault the tavern had a sale on whiskey and also a war broke out.”

Riven draws his sword. “We’re going.”

“Yes. Yes, we are.” I nod furiously, backing toward the pillar with my satchel in one hand and Luna’s wrist in the other. “This is officiallyfuck around and find outterritory, and I have very much fucked around already.”

Behind us, the pillar begins to pulse faster, sensing the incoming chaos like it wants to open just tosave mefrom my decisions. That’s sweet. Hope it likes clingy exes.

“Bean!” I call as I scramble. “Protect Luna with your tiny kitten life!”