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Kolfinna rounded a box of white uniforms, some of them sporting red stains across the front. There were two chests of clothes between them now.
“He’s not a hunter,” she said louder, as if increasing her volume would make it true. If Blár was a hunter, he’d definitely attack and kill her, because unlike Magni, he had no reason to hold back. And he was a black rank; nobody would miss her if she disappeared.
“Who knows,” he murmured.
“He’s not a hunter. You’re bluffing.” He was just trying to scare her, she told herself, growing stronger in her conviction. Blár couldn’t be a hunter, because Mímir had said he didn’t like doing things outside the military, right? “And besides, he can’t hurt me, and neither can you. Fen—CaptainAsulf said he’d protect me.” She stared at him hard, hoping her pink eyes unnerved him enough to leave her alone. To believe her when she said she wasn’t his enemy. “I plan on becoming a proper Royal Guard and you’re not going to stop me. I don’t care if you believe me or not, but I’m going to try my hardest to make this mission successful. You can’t hurt me, or else Captain Asulf will deal with you personally.”
Magni’s lips curved and he braced his arms on a dusty bookshelf. “I believe that you want to join the Royal Guard, but you’re not telling the whole story. You just want to join so you can ruin this country from the inside. So you can ensnare the men, kill them, and do whatever you want and get away with it. You want the power to freely do what you want.”
Her nostrils flared and her hands twitched at those words. How dare he! The hunters were the ones killing her kind indiscriminately! And now he wanted to say thatshewas the one trying to do the same to humans?
“And what’s wrong with freely doing what you want?” Kolfinna quelled the rage inside her that made her want to hurl chunks of the stone wall at him. She fought the urge to hate him for who he was—a hunter. It would’ve been so much easier to be the creature he believed her to be. To be truly evil and uncaring for living things just because she didn’t understand them. It would’ve been easy to choose hate, but she was tired of hate. “You know nothing about me or my people. You think we want to run an evil scheme to take over the country? We just want to live freely and without fear! What’s so wrong with that? Why can you do it, but we can’t?”
Magni hesitated, as if not expecting that answer, but then his face morphed into a scowl again. “I use my power for good, and your kind don’t know what that means.”
“Do you now?” Her bitter laugh tinkered through the thick, humid air. “You use your power for good when you’re killing fae children, women, and men? When you’re causing an entire group of people to hide for their lives because they’re terrified that you’ll kill them next? I was four years old when the hunters tried to kill me after killing my parents! What sin did I commit? What murder or evil did I commit? You know nothing about my people and our struggles. You know nothing about our magic or how much evil you commit as a hunter! Yes, we want to live freely, but what’s so wrong with that?”
Something flickered in his eyes—hesitation, or perhaps guilt?—but it disappeared quickly and he whirled around until his back was to her. “Stop talking, fae scum. I don’t have time to be arguing with you. Follow me.” He headed to the door but then paused, glancing over his shoulder at her. She couldn’t read his expression. “The instant you stop being useful, you’re dead. Consider this a warning.”
“I’ll be useful,” she spat. “And when I’m a Royal Guard, you’ll have no choice but to accept me.”
He shot her a glare but didn’t respond.
6
The starless nightsky engulfed the makeshift camp in a blanket of darkness. Kolfinna and the Royal Guards had started the trek to the Eventyrslot ruins that morning. The majority of their travel was through thick forests and unpaved paths, which made sense since the ruins were in an uninhabited part of the countryside. Kolfinna was thankful they didn’t have to travel through the city; she didn’t want to face civilians who would see her as a fae riding with the guards. There was sure to be retaliation and nasty slurs thrown at her face, and likely things tossed in her direction—she wasn’t ready for that phase just yet. The forest, however, helped keep her calm and grounded, the peaceful shush of the trees a reprieve from city eyes. But she still couldn’t calm herself completely. The closer they drew to the ruins, the tighter Kolfinna’s nerves pulled until her chest felt like it would burst open. And maybe it would. If looks could kill, she would’ve died a hundred times over that day alone.
Kolfinna rubbed her arms in slow circles; they had stopped in the middle of the woods and made camp when the sun waned. The eleven Royal Guards did their own thing—some attempted to make tents, others ate salted, dried meat and cheese from their sacks, others socialized with each other, and some tended to their horses. Kolfinna, on the other hand, sat in front of a flickering fire in the center of their camp. The fire licked and ate the logs, roaring quietly. She stared harder into it, her mind traveling to the far depths of her memories. She thought of Katla’s smiling face as she taught Kolfinna how to use magic. She thought of Blár’s ice magic as he froze the forest during their battle. She thought of Nollar’s tears as he hugged Eyfura. The jumble of thoughts blurred through her mind, none of them sticking for too long before the next one began like a seamless dream.Her mind was a large, tangled ball of yarn; it didn’t matter which thread she pulled, it refused to unknot itself.
Kolfinna’s hand inadvertently traveled to her stiffening leg. The muscles around her shin and ankle throbbed from the jostling of the horseback ride. It wasn’t just her leg that throbbed, but her hips, waist, and thighs from balancing upright on the horse and gripping so tight that the muscles screamed. It had been her first time riding a horse, and she had thought of Katla the whole time. She ached to tell Katla that she had fulfilled one of her sister’s dreams. Katla had loved horses but had never even touched one. She had always wanted to ride one and would often tell Kolfinna that one day, she’d have a horse and she’d ride it around town. As if that was a grand dream to have. But it was to Katla.
There was also the matter of the runes that bothered Kolfinna. If she couldn’t read them, did that make her useless to the party? What would the Royal Guard do to her if it came to that?
“Do you mind if I sit with you?” Eyfura stood a few feet away, her uniform bursting white against the vault of black sky. She pushed a strand of curly hair behind her ear. A flash of purple glittered on her earlobe.
“I don’t mind,” Kolfinna said as Eyfura thrust her cape away from her bottom and plopped beside her on the wooden log. Faceted, purple earrings clung to her ears and glittered against the red, blazing campfire.
“I thought earrings weren’t allowed?”Kolfinna asked.
“Hm?” Eyfura touched her ears and smiled. “Oh, this. Well, technically, they’re not allowed, but Captain Asulf doesn’t mind. He said we can modify the uniforms to our liking so long as we do our job and don’t stand outtoomuch. So these earrings and these gloves”—she wriggled her fingers in the silk and lace trimmed gloves—“are fine. And so are my hair ribbon and this necklace.” She tugged at the silver chain around her neck and held it up against the firelight. A sparkling gold butterfly hung on it. “Pretty, huh? It was one of my first purchases after becoming a Royal Guard. Just a little treat for myself.”
Kolfinna stared at the butterfly longingly, wondering what it would look like around her neck, warming against her skin. She had never owned any piece of jewelry. She and Katla had been simple maids. Their salary was never enough for extravagance and would’ve been wasted on such an unnecessary, vain thing. Not to mention that jewelry would make them stand out. Despite all of that, she couldn’t help but imagine wearing pretty earrings and glittering necklaces.
Eyfura touched her arm, jolting her from her reverie. “Are you all right?” Her voice was as low as the soft crackling of the campfire.Her eyebrows puckered together in concern and a hint of worry laced her words.
“I am, sorry, I was just lost in thought.” Kolfinna scraped her thumb into the rough ridges of the log she sat on, while her fingertips skimmed the bark slowly.
She didn’t need jewelry, she told herself. It was unnecessary. She had lived without it, and she could continue living without it.
“When you’re a Royal Guard, you can buy necklaces too.”
“What? No, I wasn’t thinking that.” Her face heated up instantly, and she was sure it wasn’t because of the fire. Kolfinna quickly pushed a strand of inky hair out of her face. “I was just wondering why Fenris—uh,CaptainAsulf—allows that.”
Eyfura didn’t look convinced but shrugged. “He’s young, so I think he doesn’t really care for those kinds of things. Plus, he’s the first Royal Guard captain who’s not a noble. So I think hereallydoesn’t care. Maybe he thinks it’s a stupid rule to be strict about.”
“Fenris isn’t a noble?” Kolfinna tilted her head at that new tidbit of information. All Royal Guards seemed so …royalwith their stiff, lavish uniforms, upright attitude, and immense influence and power. How was it that the captainwasn’ta noble?
“No, he’s not. He was raised in an orphanage on the south side of town.” Eyfura smirked at Kolfinna’s aghast expression. “Yup, the slums.”
“He’s not a hunter,” she said louder, as if increasing her volume would make it true. If Blár was a hunter, he’d definitely attack and kill her, because unlike Magni, he had no reason to hold back. And he was a black rank; nobody would miss her if she disappeared.
“Who knows,” he murmured.
“He’s not a hunter. You’re bluffing.” He was just trying to scare her, she told herself, growing stronger in her conviction. Blár couldn’t be a hunter, because Mímir had said he didn’t like doing things outside the military, right? “And besides, he can’t hurt me, and neither can you. Fen—CaptainAsulf said he’d protect me.” She stared at him hard, hoping her pink eyes unnerved him enough to leave her alone. To believe her when she said she wasn’t his enemy. “I plan on becoming a proper Royal Guard and you’re not going to stop me. I don’t care if you believe me or not, but I’m going to try my hardest to make this mission successful. You can’t hurt me, or else Captain Asulf will deal with you personally.”
Magni’s lips curved and he braced his arms on a dusty bookshelf. “I believe that you want to join the Royal Guard, but you’re not telling the whole story. You just want to join so you can ruin this country from the inside. So you can ensnare the men, kill them, and do whatever you want and get away with it. You want the power to freely do what you want.”
Her nostrils flared and her hands twitched at those words. How dare he! The hunters were the ones killing her kind indiscriminately! And now he wanted to say thatshewas the one trying to do the same to humans?
“And what’s wrong with freely doing what you want?” Kolfinna quelled the rage inside her that made her want to hurl chunks of the stone wall at him. She fought the urge to hate him for who he was—a hunter. It would’ve been so much easier to be the creature he believed her to be. To be truly evil and uncaring for living things just because she didn’t understand them. It would’ve been easy to choose hate, but she was tired of hate. “You know nothing about me or my people. You think we want to run an evil scheme to take over the country? We just want to live freely and without fear! What’s so wrong with that? Why can you do it, but we can’t?”
Magni hesitated, as if not expecting that answer, but then his face morphed into a scowl again. “I use my power for good, and your kind don’t know what that means.”
“Do you now?” Her bitter laugh tinkered through the thick, humid air. “You use your power for good when you’re killing fae children, women, and men? When you’re causing an entire group of people to hide for their lives because they’re terrified that you’ll kill them next? I was four years old when the hunters tried to kill me after killing my parents! What sin did I commit? What murder or evil did I commit? You know nothing about my people and our struggles. You know nothing about our magic or how much evil you commit as a hunter! Yes, we want to live freely, but what’s so wrong with that?”
Something flickered in his eyes—hesitation, or perhaps guilt?—but it disappeared quickly and he whirled around until his back was to her. “Stop talking, fae scum. I don’t have time to be arguing with you. Follow me.” He headed to the door but then paused, glancing over his shoulder at her. She couldn’t read his expression. “The instant you stop being useful, you’re dead. Consider this a warning.”
“I’ll be useful,” she spat. “And when I’m a Royal Guard, you’ll have no choice but to accept me.”
He shot her a glare but didn’t respond.
6
The starless nightsky engulfed the makeshift camp in a blanket of darkness. Kolfinna and the Royal Guards had started the trek to the Eventyrslot ruins that morning. The majority of their travel was through thick forests and unpaved paths, which made sense since the ruins were in an uninhabited part of the countryside. Kolfinna was thankful they didn’t have to travel through the city; she didn’t want to face civilians who would see her as a fae riding with the guards. There was sure to be retaliation and nasty slurs thrown at her face, and likely things tossed in her direction—she wasn’t ready for that phase just yet. The forest, however, helped keep her calm and grounded, the peaceful shush of the trees a reprieve from city eyes. But she still couldn’t calm herself completely. The closer they drew to the ruins, the tighter Kolfinna’s nerves pulled until her chest felt like it would burst open. And maybe it would. If looks could kill, she would’ve died a hundred times over that day alone.
Kolfinna rubbed her arms in slow circles; they had stopped in the middle of the woods and made camp when the sun waned. The eleven Royal Guards did their own thing—some attempted to make tents, others ate salted, dried meat and cheese from their sacks, others socialized with each other, and some tended to their horses. Kolfinna, on the other hand, sat in front of a flickering fire in the center of their camp. The fire licked and ate the logs, roaring quietly. She stared harder into it, her mind traveling to the far depths of her memories. She thought of Katla’s smiling face as she taught Kolfinna how to use magic. She thought of Blár’s ice magic as he froze the forest during their battle. She thought of Nollar’s tears as he hugged Eyfura. The jumble of thoughts blurred through her mind, none of them sticking for too long before the next one began like a seamless dream.Her mind was a large, tangled ball of yarn; it didn’t matter which thread she pulled, it refused to unknot itself.
Kolfinna’s hand inadvertently traveled to her stiffening leg. The muscles around her shin and ankle throbbed from the jostling of the horseback ride. It wasn’t just her leg that throbbed, but her hips, waist, and thighs from balancing upright on the horse and gripping so tight that the muscles screamed. It had been her first time riding a horse, and she had thought of Katla the whole time. She ached to tell Katla that she had fulfilled one of her sister’s dreams. Katla had loved horses but had never even touched one. She had always wanted to ride one and would often tell Kolfinna that one day, she’d have a horse and she’d ride it around town. As if that was a grand dream to have. But it was to Katla.
There was also the matter of the runes that bothered Kolfinna. If she couldn’t read them, did that make her useless to the party? What would the Royal Guard do to her if it came to that?
“Do you mind if I sit with you?” Eyfura stood a few feet away, her uniform bursting white against the vault of black sky. She pushed a strand of curly hair behind her ear. A flash of purple glittered on her earlobe.
“I don’t mind,” Kolfinna said as Eyfura thrust her cape away from her bottom and plopped beside her on the wooden log. Faceted, purple earrings clung to her ears and glittered against the red, blazing campfire.
“I thought earrings weren’t allowed?”Kolfinna asked.
“Hm?” Eyfura touched her ears and smiled. “Oh, this. Well, technically, they’re not allowed, but Captain Asulf doesn’t mind. He said we can modify the uniforms to our liking so long as we do our job and don’t stand outtoomuch. So these earrings and these gloves”—she wriggled her fingers in the silk and lace trimmed gloves—“are fine. And so are my hair ribbon and this necklace.” She tugged at the silver chain around her neck and held it up against the firelight. A sparkling gold butterfly hung on it. “Pretty, huh? It was one of my first purchases after becoming a Royal Guard. Just a little treat for myself.”
Kolfinna stared at the butterfly longingly, wondering what it would look like around her neck, warming against her skin. She had never owned any piece of jewelry. She and Katla had been simple maids. Their salary was never enough for extravagance and would’ve been wasted on such an unnecessary, vain thing. Not to mention that jewelry would make them stand out. Despite all of that, she couldn’t help but imagine wearing pretty earrings and glittering necklaces.
Eyfura touched her arm, jolting her from her reverie. “Are you all right?” Her voice was as low as the soft crackling of the campfire.Her eyebrows puckered together in concern and a hint of worry laced her words.
“I am, sorry, I was just lost in thought.” Kolfinna scraped her thumb into the rough ridges of the log she sat on, while her fingertips skimmed the bark slowly.
She didn’t need jewelry, she told herself. It was unnecessary. She had lived without it, and she could continue living without it.
“When you’re a Royal Guard, you can buy necklaces too.”
“What? No, I wasn’t thinking that.” Her face heated up instantly, and she was sure it wasn’t because of the fire. Kolfinna quickly pushed a strand of inky hair out of her face. “I was just wondering why Fenris—uh,CaptainAsulf—allows that.”
Eyfura didn’t look convinced but shrugged. “He’s young, so I think he doesn’t really care for those kinds of things. Plus, he’s the first Royal Guard captain who’s not a noble. So I think hereallydoesn’t care. Maybe he thinks it’s a stupid rule to be strict about.”
“Fenris isn’t a noble?” Kolfinna tilted her head at that new tidbit of information. All Royal Guards seemed so …royalwith their stiff, lavish uniforms, upright attitude, and immense influence and power. How was it that the captainwasn’ta noble?
“No, he’s not. He was raised in an orphanage on the south side of town.” Eyfura smirked at Kolfinna’s aghast expression. “Yup, the slums.”
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