Page 88

“Mum’s going to take care of the flower arranging for the wedding, because who knows better than her? But she’d like you to help her choose some colors. Lucy has only the vaguest idea of what a quiche actually is, but she’d like to come over so you could show her and then she’ll make them under your supervision.”

“Okay,” said Pen, smiling. “That sounds like a good plan. But, um, there was something else. About the renovations…” Her smile dropped now and she looked away. “We don’t have to do them if you don’t want. I mean, I don’t mind us living in two separate flats if that’s better for you, more comfortable.”

Ash took a large step backward. “What?”

“I mean it, Ash. If this is too much, too soon…”

“You think…” Ash rubbed her face with her hands. “Christ. I really am bad at this, aren’t I?” She reached out and took both Pen’s hands. “I just didn’t want to bother you with all the details is all, you’ve got enough to handle. George practically runs the bookshop so I’ve got time on my hands to deal with all the little things.”

“Are you sure?” Pen asked anxiously.

“One hundred percent definite,” said Ash. “I can’t wait, Pen. I can’t wait to start planning things together and decorating things together and all the rest of it.”

“And I want to help,” Pen said gently.

Ash nodded. “I know. I’m sorry. I’ll involve you. I just… I want you to have everything Pen. I want you to have the happiest, most trouble free life anyone can ever have because you deserve it.”

“You can’t keep trouble from me,” Pen said, squeezing Ash’s hands. “As sweet as the thought is. The idea is more that from now on we handle things together instead of alone, not that you handle things for me.”

“I get it,” said Ash, breathing out. She pulled Pen in closer. “I need to be better about communicating things.”

“You do,” said Pen. “And I need to be better about not assuming things. So we both have things to work on.”

“I’m not good at this,” Ash said, putting her arms around Pen. “I haven’t done it before.”

“And I haven’t done it before with you,” Pen said, smiling up at her. “It’s alright, we’ll figure things out together. That’s what this is all about.”

Ash smiled at her. “I don’t tell you how I feel often enough.”

“I know how you feel.” The breeze stirred Pen’s hair.

“No, I don’t think you do,” Ash said quite seriously. “You’re my everything. I never intended this to happen, I didn’t think it could happen. But I wake up next to you every morning thinking how lucky I am, dreading the day that you realize that you’re not as lucky as I am.”

“I would never think that,” Pen said. She looked down at the sand. “But maybe I dread the day that you realize this isn’t what you want and you leave.”

Ash swallowed. “I’m not leaving. Not ever.”

“Are you sure about that?” asked Pen, looking up.

“As sure as I can be about anything.” Pen’s eyes were so soft, so full of love, that Ash felt her heart swelling up. She cleared her throat. “Um, I’ve read enough romance novels to know that this is absolutely not the right way to do this.”

“To do what?” asked Pen, a curl of hair escaping from behind her ear and tickling her face.

It wasn’t the right way to do it. But it was suddenly the most right thing that Ash could ever imagine, the most perfect and beautiful thing she could think of, so right that she couldn’t hold the idea to herself for one more second.

“To ask you if maybe you might want to marry me,” Ash said.

Pen looked up at her. “To marry the tall, strong, grumpy woman of my dreams and live in a bakery stroke bookshop with a cat and my friends in a town that I love by the sea?” she said. “That doesn’t sound perfect at all.”

“Your friends can’t live in our flat, just to clarify,” Ash said, her body feeling lighter than she thought it had ever done before.

“Oh, well, I suppose I could compromise on that,” said Pen, standing up on tip toes so that the top of her head almost reached Ash’s lips.

“Um, you didn’t answer,” said Ash.

But Pen was already pulling her head down, already brushing her lips against Ash’s, already smiling. “What do you think?” she whispered.

“I think… I think I’m the luckiest person on the entire planet right now,” Ash said.

“See?” said Pen. “I told you everything would turn out for the best.”

They kissed for a long time with the waves lapping against the sand and the gulls crying above them and the sun sinking below the horizon. And when they were done they walked hand in hand back toward home saying not a word, because there was nothing more that needed to be said.