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“Sabine will pick you up from now on. That way, the school won’t get the wrong idea if Mommy forgets again. Right, Mommy?”
I took a deep breath, trying to slow the pounding in my chest. “Right.”
He reached out and touched the sleeve of my shirt. “And that’s a really ugly outfit you have on. Why don’t you go change? Bella, go help Mommy find a nice dress for dinner.”
“Come on, Mommy. I know what would look pretty on you.”
Forty-Nine
All of a sudden, everywhere I looked, there were turtles. They hid behind photographs, peered out from bookshelves, perched menacingly on dresser tops.
In the early days, before I learned not to share my soul, I’d told Jackson why I hated them. When Julie and I were young, my father bought a turtle for us. We’d always wanted a dog or a cat, but unrelated to her CF, Julie was allergic to both. My mom had asked him to get a box turtle, but he brought home a snapping turtle instead. It had been returned to the store after a year because its previous owner couldn’t care for it anymore. That very first day, I was feeding him a carrot, and he snapped and bit my finger. His jaw was so strong I couldn’t free it, and I screamed while Julie ran to find my mother. I can still remember the pain and my panicked feeling that he would bite it off. My mother’s quick thinking of offering him another carrot worked, and his mouth opened again. I pulled my bleeding finger out of its mouth, and we went to the emergency room. Of course, we returned the turtle, and I was left with a permanent fear of anything with a hard shell.
Jackson had listened, murmuring comfort, and it had felt good to unburden myself of another childhood trauma. When Bella was a baby, I put her down for her nap one day, and as I was leaving her nursery, something leaning over the shelf caught my eye. It was positioned among her stuffed animals. I called Jackson at work.
“Where did the turtle in Bella’s room come from?”
“What?”
“The turtle. It was in with her stuffed animals.”
“Are you serious? I’m in the middle of a killer day, and you’re asking me about a stuffed animal. I have no idea. Is there anything else?”
I suddenly felt foolish. “No. Sorry to bother you.”
I took the damn thing and threw it in the trash.
The next day, Meredith stopped by for a visit, and I invited her to have coffee in the conservatory. She walked over to the floor-to-ceiling bookcases and picked something up.
“This is lovely, Daphne. I’ve never noticed it before.” She was holding a white-and-gold porcelain turtle.
I dropped my cup, spilling hot coffee all over myself.
“Oh my gosh, what a klutz,” I sputtered and rang for Margarita to clean up. “Jackson must have picked that up. I hadn’t noticed.” I clasped my hands together to stop them shaking.
“Well, it’s quite beautiful. Limoges.”
“Take it.”
She shook her head. “Don’t be silly. I was only admiring it.” She gave me a strange look. “It’s time I was going. I’m meeting Rand at the club for lunch.” Then she put her hand on my arm. “Are you okay?”
“Yes, just tired. I’m still adjusting to the baby’s schedule.”
She smiled. “Of course. Try and get some rest. I’ll call you later.”
After she left, I searched online to find the turtle. Over $900!
That night, I placed it on the table in front of his plate. When he sat down to dinner, he glanced at it, then back at me.
“What’s this doing here?”
“That’s exactly what I’d like to know.”
He shrugged. “It belongs in the conservatory.”
“Jackson, why are you doing this? You know how I feel about turtles.”
“Do you hear how crazy you sound? It’s just a little figure. Can’t hurt you.” He was looking at me with that smug expression, challenging me with his eyes.