Page 125 of The Darkest Note

I scrape at an angry tear that falls down my cheek.

He looks down at me, red in the face, like he’s fighting tears of his own. “But I’ve had it hard. It’s not because I want to shut you out, okay?”

“Youhave it hard?” I hiss. “Try being seventeen and going to the fanciest school on a work scholarship. Try staying back to clean classrooms and then running to the diner to work a shift. And then playing music in a lounge at night because you need rent money. Oh, and speaking of rent money, try getting a notice in the mail saying you’ve defaulted on a loan!”

His eyes widen and he takes a step toward me. Hands on my shoulders, he croaks, “You got a mail sayingwhat?”

“Get off me.” I shrug his arms away.

Still looking dazed, Rick drags a hand over his mouth. “There’s been a mistake. You weren’t supposed to get any letters.”

I freeze. His words bounce around in my head, but they’re not making sense.

He pulls his lips into his mouth, looking defeated.

“You’re the one who’s been paying the bank.” The puzzle pieces come together as I speak. “You—of course. Mom wouldn’t have been responsible enough to work anything out with them. It was you who’s been paying our rent since she…”

“I didn’t want to tell you. But I lost my job and I had to scramble to get another one. This gig,” he gestures to the security uniform, “is so I can make enough to cover both our rents. But I keep falling short every month. I haven’t been able to keep up with the payments.”

Shock ripples through me. No wonder he snapped at me when I asked why he didn’t take care of the electric bill like he promised. He’d already been extending himself trying to cover our loan.

Mom never left anything for us. Her last act as our mother was to dump the responsibilities on her children’s shoulders.

I turn around because it hurts to hear the truth. There was a part of me that thought she’d changed at the end. Maybe she’d really done something selfless for once.

It’s a blow to learn I was wrong.

It’s a blow to learn that my half-brother has been taking care of us while I’ve been resenting him.

It’s a blow to learn that so many things I thought I knew were lies.

My head pounds.

“Cadence.”

“You won’t have to take care of our rent anymore,” I finally spit out.

“Don’t.” I wrench my arm back before he can touch me. “We really have been a burden to you. I get why you resent us. If I’d known, I would have taken care of it sooner.” My nostrils flare. I’m talking big, but I don’t have a way out. I feel like I’m drowning. Everything inside is pulling so tight that I can’t even breathe.

Mom just keeps throwing me surprise after surprise, except all her ‘gifts’ blow up in my face. I’m not sure how many more of her secrets I can take.

“Wait.” Rick puts his hand on my shoulder.

“Get your handsoffher,” a voice hisses through the night.

As I’m feeling the most fragile and battling a screaming chaos in my head, Dutch steps into our line of sight.

I watch him and the broken shards that linger in the depths of my soul, scattered from years of living with pain and heartache, comes alive. A snake rising from smoke.

The chaos in me gets louder. Wilder.

I’m out for blood tonight.

And I’m going to take that pound of flesh from Dutch.

* * *

DUTCH