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The more I watched Sutton spiral into grief and remorse, the more I could see that she was following that dark path I had once walked. I would love to say that this is no longer a problem of mine. However, I believe that in a large part, it’s human nature and can’t be avoided.
She was pulling away from me, and it freaked me the fuck out. I needed to get to her, and I had no idea how to go about it.
Candice was better at the comforting shit. She seemed to know just what to say. All I could think was that death was horrible. Even when someone is old as the hills and twice as infirm, and everyone says it’s a blessing they could move on.
There is always some sad bloke trying to keep a stoic face because to him that person was a mother, life partner, or dear friend.
Even with Gabe, who I knew to the depths of my soul was a dick head, he played a large role in Sutton’s life. It’s that crazy feeling when you want to be mad at them for your sorrow because they never deserved your love.
The days leading up to the visitation and funeral were long and trying. I now officially had met every resident of Otterville Falls. They did indeed take care of their own.
Despite Sutton’s withdrawal during the day, she came to me wildly and passionately in the night. We would make love, fuck, and cuddle, and for those brief moments of darkness, I could pretend that everything was going to be okay.
And then the morning of the funeral came. We were all still residing at the trailer. Two new beds had been delivered along with more clothing for all of us. I was beginning to feel a little attached to the ramshackle place.
That should have been the first clue that I had gone off the deep end.
I have been to many funerals in my life. My sister’s had been the first when I was six years old. I don’t remember a lot about it. Only the sadness and hollowness that I couldn’t shake in my little boy mind.
The minister took one look at Sutton and I approaching his church and he bristled. “What have I told you about coming to the house of the Lord?”
I wasn’t about to take that, and in seconds, I had him by his priest collar in a chokehold.
“Sutton paid for and arranged the entire funeral. You are going to suck up any prejudice you have against her and treat Sutton with respect. If you can’t do that, I will lay you out flat. Are we clear?”
His wispy hair was disheveled and his collar hopelessly crinkled. But it didn’t matter. I had gotten the message across and he wouldn’t bother her again.
I don’t know what I was expecting from Sutton, but aside from a small smile of thanks, she didn’t say anything.
We walked up the steps to the chapel that she wasn’t allowed in and made our way inside. There was a hush as we entered, and I could feel my fists clenching. How could she have an emotional attachment to these people?
Before I could grab her arm and yank her out of that hell-forsaken church, Reena and Alice waved their arms.
Sutton sighed visibly and made her way over to them. There was enough room on the pew for four more people, and we had that many with Candice and Knox in tow.
I wasn’t sure I wanted to forgive Knox for insinuating that Sutton needed an alibi that morning when Gabe was found dead. But the longer things went on, I was starting to see that it was more about her protection than accusing her of any guilt.
Almost every person in there was staring her down. I was so fucking proud of the way she held her head up high and kept her back ramrod straight. Sutton was no shrinking violet. She stood tall and proud like a sunflower that refused to be cowed by the people she loved.
The minister began the service and droned on and on about our bodies being an earthly vessel. He preached that even though the flesh is weak, the soul was designed to live on. It was when he got to Gabe’s many virtues that I thought I might be sick.
I wasn’t sure who the priest was extolling, but it wasn’t the man I knew. I supposed that a man had a right to be remembered well even if it was a damn lie. But there was someone else that was getting a little too full of this bullshit as well.
It wasn’t Sutton.
“I thought we were here to pay Gabe of Abberly’s last respects, not the archangel Gabriel.”
There was a stunned silence as Mad Max stood at the back of the room, one leg crossed over the other and an unlit cigarette hanging from his lips.
The priest’s lips flapped like a fish. “This is highly irregular.”
Max shrugged. “So is lying in a house of God, but that’s never stopped you before, Stan, has it?”
There was a horrified gasp from the audience as they began to piece together that the minister and Max knew each other quite well.
“What was my favorite line from just now, Stan?” Max grinned, but it only held threats. “’Gabe was a man of charity, of kindness, a man of honor.’”
Knox got to his feet. He had released Max yesterday, and I could see that he was regretting that decision. Before he could say anything, Reena stood up with the help of her cane.