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They ate together, the conversation flowing easily as they spent a few minutes discussing work and the weather and a bunch of other subjects, like Remi’s obsessive love for the donkey they’d purchased for the event barn, and what Gretchen could expect from a Thanksgiving dinner with Theo’s family.
He’d invited her, Edith, and Manny to join them this year, insisting there was plenty of room for everyone. Apparently, Kasi’s dad and brother were also new participants. For the first time in her life, Gretchen was looking forward to the holiday season. In the past, it’d been the worst part of her year, as she was painfully aware her holidays were never as festive and bright as those of the other kids in her class.
And sadly, that hadn’t changed with Briggs, who bitched that he wasn’t about to spend his hard-earned money on a bunch of fancy food and presents, insisting the entire season was a way for big businesses to bleed the little man dry.
The thought of her ex no longer scared her as much as annoyed her. Briggs hadn’t shown up in Gracemont, and Gretchen wasn’t sure what to make of that. Perhaps Sheriff Anderson had thrown him off the track. Or perhaps he was biding his time, doing his research, trying to find out exactly where she was and what she was doing.
If that was true, more fool him. Because the longer he stayed away, the stronger and angrier she got. The initial fear and panic she’d felt had long since faded, in no small part due to the people around her. Once she came clean to Theo’s family about her past, she didn’t just find herself with an army at her back but a family at her side.
“No phone calls today?” Theo asked, the question a daily one.
“No. I’m not sure what to make of Briggs’s silence.” Gretchen had been convinced now that he had her phone number, he’d begin calling and texting.
“No news is good news,” Theo said easily, though Gretchen wasn’t sure that applied in this case.
“Maybe.”
“You know,” Theo said, changing the subject. “If you wanted to invite your brother to Thanksgiving, he’d be more than welcome.”
Gretchen took a sip of wine, stalling as she searched for a response. “I’m not sure he’d accept.”
Lately, Theo mentioned Shaw more and more, probably because—given his closeness to his brothers—he couldn’t conceive of siblings who didn’t stay in touch.
“Why not?”
Gretchen leaned back in her chair. Shaw had been on her mind a lot lately as well. Maybe even more than Briggs. “I’m not even sure he knows I don’t live in Harrisburg anymore.”
Theo tilted his head, one eyebrow raised to let her know he wasn’t going to let her get away with her evasive answers.
She grimaced. “I haven’t talked to him in a long time. I stopped calling after the last time. I…” She toyed with her fork, struggling with how to explain her mindset. “I went to a very dark place after Briggs dragged me back from the bus station. I started believing his lies, his insults. I even wondered if he was right, that maybe I was losing my mind. I let him convince me that I was unlovable and stupid. I let him drive a wedge between me and Shaw, believing him when he said my brother had abandoned me like my parents. The last time Shaw and I spoke on the phone, I was angry, and I parroted back Briggs’s words. We haven’t spoken since.”
“He doesn’t know about the abuse, does he?”
“No. During the early years, I defended Briggs to Shaw, claiming it was true love and the difference in our ages didn’t matter. Going so far that when Briggs started hitting me, I was embarrassed to admit I’d been wrong. Besides…Shaw would have killed Briggs if he’d known.”
Theo smiled sadly. “Sounds like a good brother, one who loves you enough to want to protect you.”
Gretchen toyed with the stem of her wine glass. “His phone number is written on a Post-it on my desk. I look at it fifty times a day, but I can’t make myself call. What if I ruined things between us? What if I’ve driven him away forever?”
“If you don’t call, you will have driven him away forever.”
It was a valid point, one she’d considered countless times. It was just… “If I call, and he rejects me… If he hates me and can’t forgive me, it’ll hurt more than anything Briggs ever did to me.”
Theo reached across the table. “This is another one of those moments when you need to be brave.”
She shook her head and rolled her eyes. “Those are really stacking up, aren’t they?”
Theo laughed. “Yep.”
“I think I’ll tackle the Briggs one first.”
Theo let her get away with that response, though she knew him well enough to know he wouldn’t give up on reconnecting her with her brother.
She loved him for it.
Gretchen sucked in a sharp breath, one that Theo, mercifully, didn’t hear as he rose and began clearing the table.
She loved Theo.