Page 69

“Raph, no!” I hear Michael scold him.

“He’s the one who wants to know, babe.”

Yes, I do. Of all my brothers, Raph is the only one who treats me like a proper adult. He shields me from the outside world just like the others do, but he also encourages me to have my own experiences to make my own mistakes. To just be.

“Maybe he’ll even findhis taste.” Raph means sexual taste, doesn’t he? I already know mine; it’s the reason why Uri didn’t want me to touch him last night—after he made me come. Isn’t it? I need answers.

“Send me the details,” I breathe out.

“It opens at nine.”

“Sari…” Michael doesn’t say anything else, but his voice sounds uncertain and almost tortured.

“Don’t tell Uri,” I say before ending the call. The phone is shaking in my hands as Serena announces Lori and Gabe’s arrival. I can see Gabe’s car driving down the cottage driveway on the large screen near the front door.

My head is spinning like a whirlwind when they make their way inside a few moments later. I leave the sofa and take a few steps toward them. Lori is as bubbly as always, but his smile drops when his eyes find mine.

“Did you know?” I ask him.

“Know what?” Gabe asks.

I glance at him before looking back at Lori. “Madame Claudette’s. You texted Ren instead of Michael.”

“Oh.” Lori looks relieved for a moment, but then he curses loudly while checking his phone.

“You knew Uri was a member,” I accuse him. Why has he been encouraging me to go for him, when he knew about the club?

“I discovered it a while back.” I see remorse on his face, but it doesn’t make me feel better. “But we all know who he wants; it doesn’t matter if he’s going to the club tonight,” Lori quickly adds.

“Tonight?” I snap. Oh God, I’m such an idiot. That’s why he didn’t order me to come back to the lake house. Me, sleeping here actually turned out perfect for him.

“We all knew about Madame Claudette’s,” Gabe decides to let me know. “It was never a secret.”

Oh, but it was. “Of course you all did. As usual, I’m the only one in the dark.” The weak, naive brother who can’t protect himself. I can feel their pitying gazes heavy on me.

“What he does there, Angel?—”

I interrupt Lori’s explanation, “No! I’ll soon find out what Uri actually does there.”

“What—?”

I spin and walk down the corridor, going inside Rague and Ollie’s room. I sit on their bed. Why am I even this upset? We fooled around a couple of times, and once I was under the influence. For him it must have been nothing. Does he even know how I feel about him? How I’ve always felt? Does he care? Of course he doesn’t, he’s a sociopath.

A bitter laugh leaves my lips. I see a shadow moving toward me as Sully stops on the threshold.

“What do you call…when you feel both relieved and in pain?” I ask, my voice breaking on the last word.

“Lost?”

I nod. “Yeah, that’s exactly it.”

I have always thought my relationship with Uri was like a huge wave. An overwhelming wave that swept me in one direction, then the other, almost drowning me. Then left me to dry on the seashore, still craving the all-consuming feeling only he can arise inside me.

My feet are sweating in the delicate red slippers that the woman behind the counter in Madame Claudette’s lobby offered me. As I make my way down the plain staircase, cushioned only by a thin carpeting over stone, I notice stares of appreciation from strangers. My breath catches as a nauseating sensation surges through me, not because other men are looking at me, but because Uri probably sent that same heated stare to someone else.

I walk straight to the bar; the slippers make no sound on the sparkly white floor. The red marble counter feels cold as I grab the edge to sit on one of the high stools. The weak yellow lights cast an eerie glow over the large room. There are few people sitting on the purple velvet sofas situated all around. Some half naked, kneeling, kissing, laughing, others in weird positions like the guy who’s being used as a footrest or the woman wearing a collar and neighing like a horse while herownerparades her around.

I don’t know what kind of place this is, but I’m way out of my comfort zone. For a moment, I think about leaving. But I’m tired of running away. I clench my hand and keep looking around. I don’t see Uri, but I know he’s here. Rami used the tracker under his ear to get his location. He’s not supposed to do it, but I asked, and although my brothers treat me like a kid, they can also never say no to me. They still felt the need to let me hear their strong oppositions to my coming here—objections I ignored.