Page 15

I kept track of his eyes, waiting for them to meet mine again. When they did, the throb increased and for the first time ever, I felt desire for a man—a real man in front of me. Not a fictional one, or one I made up, but a real man. My tongue slicked across my lips and I considered what to do next. The night had been so crazy and it was so late and maybe the adrenaline rollercoaster was pushing me to make rash decisions. Maybe I needed comfort to cope with everything. I didn’t know why, but I stepped forward, moving to close the small distance between us.

And he cleared his throat, jerking his gaze from mine, halting my movement like a bucket of cold water. “It’s late.”

“Yeah,” I breathed, embarrassment heating my skin.

“I’ll see you in the morning.” He looked back but there was nothing there. Maybe I’d imagined it. Maybe it was all a desperate reach to feel like he was a hero. I’d wanted it so much that the desire had flooded out the seeds of doubt about why he had been on the site in the first place. It all felt like too much and after the day, I didn’t know anymore.

It was late. Maybe sleep would clear my head. “Thank you for dinner.”

“No problem. Have a good night, Alexandra.”

“You too, Erik.”

I didn’t look back as I walked up the stairs, even though I wanted to confirm if the heat at my back was his stare or only my imagination. I even took my time down the short hall wondering if I’d see him again before sleep. I lingered at the door, my eyes on the stairs. I’d all but given up when I heard him check his voicemail. It was wrong to eavesdrop. He probably assumed he had privacy and I should give it to him. But he was a strange man who found me from an ad selling my virginity. I figured the more I knew the better. I’d be able to make the right decisions with more knowledge.

“Erik,” a female voice said through the speaker. “I miss you. I hate that I haven’t heard from you after our trip together and I don’t understand. Or maybe I do. I was walking down the street when I saw you at lunch with a young woman. She looked like a kid, and maybe that’s what you’re in to, but you could at least let me know. I could—”

The message was cut off. But it was too late. I’d heard it and the doubt in my mind about his intentions grew. Everything from the kitchen vanished and the wall of questions rebuilt itself one brick at a time.

Footsteps crossed the living room getting closer to the stairs. I quickly backed into my room and closed the door without a sound, making sure all the locks were turned. Stepping back, I stared, half expecting the handle to try and turn. Half expecting him to come after me and demand I repay his hospitality. I stood there for a few more minutes before backing up until my knees hit the bed. Even when I sat, I didn’t move my gaze from the door.

When my eyes began to burn from the effort to stay open for so long, I forewent the welcoming bed and grabbed the blanket and pillow and made myself comfortable in front of the door. Just like at home, I was unsure of my safety and did everything I could to protect myself.

A sexy stranger wasn’t coming to save me.

A miracle wasn’t happening.

It was just me.

I had to be my own savior.

6

Erik

Staring at the black liquid slowly draining into the cup, I willed it to go faster. I needed an energy boost before I had to face the girl—Alexandra—again. I’d lain awake most of the night trying to figure out every possible scenario for today. None of them had eased the pounding behind my eyes enough to sleep. Add in the erection that refused to subside after the whole kitchen stare down and I’d been wired for hours. It wasn’t until I finally caved and reached my hand under the sheet and stroked myself that I was able to relax enough.

I hadn’t allowed myself to think of her when I first gripped my cock. She was a child in a vulnerable situation and no matter how much I tried to repeat it to myself and imagine the blonde with bouncing tits from earlier in the week it didn’t work. My mind strayed to crystalline blue eyes staring up at me like I was the answer. When I closed my eyes and tried to focus solely on my impending orgasm, it was remembering her tongue slicking across her lips that had me grinding my teeth to hold back my moans as I came.