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Or has she allied herself with the old asshole?
Rick stared off and shrugged. “If our family can be useful in a charm offensive, we’ll try. The place needs to be safe for us and our children. Odette shares in that.”
“I appreciate it,” I relaxed a bit.
Rick patted my back. “We’ll get the bastard one way or another if it kills me.”
Maybe she hadn’t blown me off? Maybe shewasjust busy? After all, shewasa princess. I wasn’t sure what they did, but it must have been a busy life. I’d have to wait around to figure it out. Either way, I couldn’t give up on the intersection—Odette or no Odette. It was an irrational fixation I couldn’t quit. Watching her fall, nearlysmashed and terrified as she searched for her dog, I knew the time for inaction was over. I could bring this small, positive change if I stayed the course.
11
REAL TALK
ODETTE
“Isee you’re proud of your patronage. That’s good. Look at you integrating your favourite thing into work—your bike!”
I looked over at Grieg as he slept beside me. Elisa read my mind.
“Well, after Grieg, of course. Either way, that is a meaningful way to give back, right?”
I’d been so excited about my patronage that I’d sent Elisa a message. I’d done so while trying to avoid sending Wyatt the message I’d drafted half a dozen times already. It lived rent-free in my mind and always in my drafts folder.
“It feels good,” I said. “It’s a great opportunity.”
“See, your sister came around!”
I nodded. “She relaxed a little. And you’d be proud of me. I advocated for myself!”
“Good for you! Why do you look much less excited than I thought you would?”
“There’s more to it. I have a crush on a guy, and I’m pretty worried about it fucking everything up.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s not gone well for me in the past. I just got myself into some rhythm.”
I played with the dog’s ears, distracting myself from opening up.
“If you are trying to get me to talk you out of having a crush, I won’t,” Elisa said. “I think having feelings—regardless of acting on them—is good for you. I’m not here to be your jailer, Odette. If you are using me as an out to deny yourself a step forward, I won’t give it to you.”
Your jailer. The words resonated so much that I picked Grieg up and held him on my lap. For the first fifteen years of my life, our grandmother served as our jailer. Until Rick married Alex and freed us, I’d never attended school with other children. Talking about it hurt, but I trusted Elisa.
“I don’t know what to do without a jailer,” I said.
“Do you worry that you will always need someone to tell you what to do?”
I shrugged. Grieg nuzzled my stomach and fell asleep again. Before I spoke, I listened to his quiet breathing to soothe me.
Elisa looked at the clock. I knew already our session was over.
“You have a lot to think about,” Elisa reminded. “Celebrate this win and stop getting in your own way.”
“Okay,” I agreed.
I cycled home, wishing things could be easy. I wanted some sign about what wasright. I needed to talk to someone, but Ingrid wasn’t around. I couldn’t drop this on Alexandra. She was too sick and too busy to care.
Thankfully, I knew one person who wouldn’t judge me, and he looked to be in his office.