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She sighed. “Of course you do. Because you’re a good guy.”
More like because I’d been stupidly fucking in love with her for at least a year, so I paid attention whenever she was around or when mutual friends spoke about her. I prowled forward, resting my hands on the mattress, either side of her ass, so our faces were closer. “You aren’t a bad person, Rebel. I know what this is. Where I stand with you. If that’s all I ever get to have with you, then that will be enough.”
She covered her face with her hands and shook her head. “Nooooo. That’s not fair to you. I wish I could give you more, but I just have nothing to give. I watched my mother fall for men over and over, and it always ended with her on the floor in the fetal position, barely able to function. She had me to pick her up and put her to bed and bring in money to pay the bills. I don’t have that luxury. I can’t afford for a man to destroy me. Not even one as sweet and good as you.”
Her shoulders shook quietly.
I wrapped my fingers around hers and drew them down so I could see her tearstained face. “I’ll never hurt you.”
“You would never mean to. But, Fang, you would. Or worse, I’d hurt you. I couldn’t live with that.”
My desperation wasn’t pretty, but this felt a whole lot like slipping right back to where we always did. With the two of us being fuck buddies and nothing more. I didn’t want that. “I can share you, Pix. It might fucking kill me, but if that’s what you want, then I’ll do it. It works out pretty well for War and Bliss and the other guys.”
She went quiet for a moment, stroking her fingers across the stubble of my beard. Eventually, she answered. “It’s not fair of me to ask that from you.”
“It’s better than where we’ll end up if I smother you and make you run.” I leaned into her touch and closed my eyes. “You just need to promise me one thing.”
“What?”
I opened my eyes to gaze into hers. “I need you to pick guys who are going to watch out for you like I do. Hell, it might be a good thing. I could actually sleep today because I knew Kian was there for you when I couldn’t be. I like him.”
“You do?” She cocked her head to one side. “You aren’t bi, are you?”
I snorted on a laugh. “I don’t like him like that.”
She giggled. “More’s the pity. The two of you would be freaking hot together.”
I pressed her back into the bed. “I’d rather get hot with you.”
She wrapped her arms around my neck and smiled softly. “Me too.”
The pride that rushed through me at making her smile was ridiculous. It was such a small thing, but it lit me up inside every time. I hadn’t been lying when I said I’d do anything, including watch her date other men, if that’s what brought her happiness.
I wasn’t happy if she wasn’t. I was man enough to recognize I didn’t fill every gap in her life. She wouldn’t be my Pix if I tried to keep her in a cage.
I hoped Vaughn and Kian knew that too.
I’d make sure they did. No one was fucking hurting her ever again. Not even me.
I undid the button on her skirt, and she helped me lower it down her hips. Her sweet little pussy was right there, bare and just begging me to suck it again. So I did. I buried my face between her thighs once more and reveled in being back in my favorite place in the world. This room. At this club. Where outside, my brothers had my back, and in here, I had the woman I would compare every other to.
None would ever come close.
I needed her naked. Needed to mark every inch of her body with my kiss, and my hands, and my tongue, before she let anyone else do it. Her top was already around her middle, but I pushed at it, and she dragged it off the rest of the way.
She lay quietly beneath me, her eyes big when I dragged my gaze up her body to her face.
I stopped. “Are you okay?”
She nodded. “Better than okay.”
“I need you to tell me how far I can go.”
“I’m yours.”
They were words I’d always wanted to hear her say, except I knew she didn’t mean them the way I wanted her to. I would be okay with that if it killed me. “I want to fuck you, Pix. But I’m scared I’m going to hurt you.”
She shook her head reassuringly. “You won’t. Of all the people in this world, Fang, you’re the only one I trust to be the first after…”