Page 94

I can breathe.

As much as I try to see what the garden is in its current state, I’m so full of what it could be that it’s difficult to think of much else. I snap pictures on my phone so that when I get upstairs, I can sketch over them on my laptop, making it come to life in the only way I know how. Over here, some ferns. Over there, a table for Danner to take his tea. Roses on the east end of it, naturally, because even though I’ve come to hate them, the Palace wouldn’t be the Palace without them. Color, though. It’ll need something bright and lively.

Not wisteria.

Bluebells, maybe, or morning glories.

But the peaceful nature of the solarium has its downside. It seems to constantly put me in the position of being caught off guard, which is why when I hear Lex’s voice, I jump out of my skin.

“Pace lost you.”

When I spin, I find him staring at me, arms crossed. “Lost me?” I ask, heart thumping wildly. Even though I know this version of Lex is awake, clothed, hair tied back neatly into a knot, it’s still difficult to look at him and not see that other version.

The one with the gold eyes and feral energy.

Lex jerks his chin upward. “No cams in here.”

I follow his gaze, thinking I like this solarium a little more every day. “I’m allowed to be here,” I rush out, voice defensive. “Danner said–”

“Danner doesn’t make the rules.” Lex’s eyes dip down, and I almost forget why they should. The bruises around my throat are merely faint smudges by now. “Anyway, that’s not why I’m here. I have a meeting at nine, so I need you downstairs now.”

My heart all at once sinks and rises. It’s a confusing tangle, the anticipation and the dread, and I tuck the phone into my pocket. “I see.”

Because why else would he, or any of them, track me down?

“It won’t be like before,” he says, the words a touch harder than I’m expecting. “That only happens when…” he swallows. “It’ll be fine. I’m awake.”

I look up, surprised at the defensiveness in his tone. “I know you are.”

“I didn’t know what I was doing.”

“I know.”

His nostrils flare. “You shouldn’t have just walked up on me like that.”

“I know.”

“No, you don’t,” he snaps, and a darkness fills his eyes that makes me bite back a shiver. “That’s what I’m trying to get through to you. You don’t know everything about me. You don’t know everything about my brothers. And you damn well don’t know everything about this house or East End in general.”

I only just manage not to tell him that I know. “I… don’t,” I agree.

The only thing I know is that from the outside the Princes, the Purple Palace and probably even this solarium look beautiful; shiny people and places filled with promise. When the reality is that the inside is dead and decaying–bitter and strangling the life out of everyone inside.

Lex turns, obviously expecting me to follow, and I do, dutiful and willing to fulfill my purpose, to allow him to fulfillhispurpose: to create life in a barren landscape.

“Look at me.”

My eyes fling open at Lex’s command, our gazes locking. My toes curl as his semen fills me, and I wonder why he always demands it. Does he enjoy seeing my cheeks redden at the thought of what he’s doing with the syringe? Is it to humiliate me? If it is, then it doesn’t feel like it. There’s no satisfaction in his stare as he slowly shoots it into me.

Mostly, my blood starts rushing the second he pulls it out, because I know what’s coming next.

Me.

I’m just preparing myself for the pressure of his latex-covered fingers against my clit when I realize he’s pulling something out of his pocket.

Asecondsyringe of semen.

There’s a spot of color on his cheeks as he clears his throat, spreading me to carefully slide the syringe inside. “Look at–” He doesn’t finish because he doesn’t need to.