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“Wait, you get time off on your period?” Her eyebrows shoot up her forehead. “God, my men love a bloodbath. I think it makes them hornier.”

She balls up the paper towels and I grab some more, wetting them and handing them to her. “It’s in the covenants. Trust me, they’re not happy about it. Especially Wicker.”

She snorts. “I bet. The fuckboys always take it the worst.” Her eyes land on my stomach. “Shit. I guess that means you’re not pregnant.”

“Unfortunately, no.” I gesture to the paper towels. “You need another one?”

“Just to dry off.” I pull them out and give her a couple. “You sound disappointed you’re not pregnant already.”

Sighing, I fold my arms, glad to have someone else to talk to. Family dinner isn’t for two more days. “It means I have another month of scheduled sex, at least. It’s just so exhausting. Andfrustrating. These last few days have been the first restful nights I’ve had yet.”

She dries off and smooths her skirt down. “Lack of sleep definitely makes everything worse. Killian Payne hasn’t given me a solid night’s rest in over a year. Now I’m ready for it, like I take naps and stuff, but at the beginning…” She looks at me a bit too closely, and I wonder if she’s seeing how worn down I am. How I’m losing control. “Verity, I know it’s not easy. Talk to me. Tell me what’s going on.”

I weigh my words. I’ve signed a contract that forbids me to talk about what happens in the Palace. I’m also not allowed to speak to any other frats, especially women. But I’m struggling. Mentally and physically and if something doesn’t give, I’m not sure I’ll survive the next month.

“When I agreed to this, the thought of not getting pregnant was a pretty bright prospect. Now that I’m in the house, acting as Princess…” I bite my lip, wondering if I’m going to sound crazy. “This place–or maybe the Royalty, I don’t know–it all has this way of blinding you, doesn’t it? Like even though the last thing I want to do is bring another life into this fucked up world, day-to-day, it’s all I can think about. I can’t tell if I want it or if I just need to want it, in order to get by.”

She watches me with a pensive frown. “Get by? Are they that bad?”

“Yes,” I answer, unequivocally.

Her head tilts curiously. “I thought Princes were… you know. Sweet.”

Propping a hand on my hip, I reply, “Yeah, well, arsenic can be sweet if you put it into a milkshake.”

Her eyes darken, and she steps forward, pinning me with a serious look. “If we need to pull you out of there, we can. You’re not pregnant yet. They might come for you, but not for long.”

I stop her before she begins scheming. “I don’t want to quit, Story.” Looking her in the eye, I raise my chin. “I want to win.”

After a moment of assessing me, she snorts. “Wow, you really are West End, aren’t you?”

“I saw you out there,” I finally say, embarrassed to admit it. “With your Lord.”

She grimaces. “Shit. Sorry. Tris… he’s super into the public stuff. It makes it worse when his father pays for all the buildings and he thinks he owns them. I figured no one would be in the heirloom seed corner of the horticulture section.”

Wringing my hands, I begin, “I didn’t mean to—I was looking for a book and, well, you were just there, and…”

“And what?” she asks, facing the mirror and running her fingers through her hair.

“Is it always like that for you?” I swallow, feeling my cheeks burn. “Like… do they always get you off?”

“Like it’s their job.” Her forehead creases. “Your Princes don’t?”

I slide my eyes to the door. “Not really.”

She looks stumped. “Why the hell not?”

“There’s nothing in the covenants about my pleasure,” I explain, eyes rolling. “And if it’s not in the covenants…”

“Do you want them to,” she asks. “Get you off?”

Leveling her with a look, I repeat, “Day-to-day, Lady. You told him you love him. How? How do you love a man who did that to you?” I nod at her chest.

She follows my gaze, a shadow falling over her features. “I don’t love them because of this, and I don’t love them in spite of it, either.” Her fingertips brush over the scar between her breasts. K. One of her Lords’ initials. “I love them because this changed us. All of us. It’s really complicated.”

“I’m not judging, I just–” I rub my forehead, trying to find the words. “They hurt you, and they put that leash on you.” I point to her wrist cuff. “How do you get past that? How do you get to the point where you’re fucking in a library and he’s giving you amazing orgasms?”

Her head snaps back in surprise. “Is that what you want? For your Princes to love you?”