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Every member of the Mist Guard had argued against it at first, each one offering to go in our place. The king should stay behind, protected, they argued. Another scout should investigate instead, they suggested. But Kalen and I just looked at each other, and we knew. We had to be the ones to do this.

If Oberon was on that mountain, we needed to find him ourselves.

“You’re risking your life for that fool,” Nellie said.

Startled, I met her gaze. “Kalen?”

“No, Oberon. You don’t have to give him any more of your time. Stay here. Enjoy your life with us. Be free and happy, and never think of him again.” Her pleading eyes tugged at my heart, and I wished I could give her what she wanted.

Sighing, I crossed the room and took her hands in mine. “I can’t do that, Nellie. Not when I carry his mark on my skin. Imustface him. One last time. And I will end this for all of us—or Kalen will.”

“I just,” she whispered, “wish you wouldn’t do this to yourself.”

“Do what? Fight Oberon?”

She searched my gaze with such intensity, it shot dread through my heart. Her fingers tightened around my hands. “Those mountains. You don’t want to go there.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You’ve been there before. I know you don’t remember, and for the longest time, I tried to help you see, but now…I think it’s just better if you don’t. You can move on. Be happy. With Kalen.”

I swallowed and pulled my fingers from her grip. “When did I go there?”

“When you were very small. With father.”

Something rumbled in my chest, and a strange whimper rose from the back of my throat. Eyes wide, I pressed my hand to my neck and swallowed down the noise. I didn’t understand where that had come from. I didn’t know why my vision swam and my ears rang with the sound of a thousand bells.

Nellie’s shoulders slumped. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

I pressed my hand tighter against my chest and felt the erratic beat of my heart. “Why do I feel this way? What happened out there? Why can’t I remember?”

“You pushed it from your mind. I think you did it to protect yourself from the truth. That’s why you can’t go back there, Tessa. After what’s happened with Mother, I think you need some time to heal.”

Kalen’s muscular form filled the doorframe. “Are you ready to go, Tessa?”

I kept my eyes glued to my sister’s face. “Tell me what happened.”

“I can’t.” She shook her head, her voice cracking. “I won’t do that to you. You need to remember it yourself, and not right now. Just trust me. Don’t go to those mountains.”

I looked from Nellie to Kalen and then back to Nellie again. Her words rang with a truth that dug into the depths of my mind—like one of the tools I’d once used on the chasm walls—chipping away at my tenuous grip on reality. For a long time, I’d known there wassomethingwrong, like a shadow that shifted in the corner of my vision. But whenever I turned to look, nothing was there. I’d known this, and I’d pretended it didn’t exist. Nothing was wrong. Everything was fine.

But looking at Nellie now, I was forced to face the truth.

Those mountains held memories that were so terrible I’d hidden them deep in my mind. But I could not turn away from this. It was time.

“I’m going with Kalen,” I said, stepping away from her. “I’ll be back soon. I promise.”

* * *

Kalen and I met the others at the stables. Alastair, Fenella, and Niamh were armed to the teeth, and their black leather armor turned their forms into shifting shadows that blended with the mists. As I approached them, Alastair shot me an easy grin.

“Glad to see you’re with us.” He suddenly tossed me an apple. I reacted instantly to catch it. “Some extra food for your pack.”

“Thanks. Glad to see you too.” I slid the pack around to my front and shoved the apple inside. “How’d you decide which of you would come, anyway?”

Niamh slung an arm around my shoulders and steered me over to the horses that waited beside the stable doors. “Easy. Toryn’s still healing. While Gaven is incredibly powerful, he’s better at politics than battles. And the people of Endir trust him. He needed to stay.”

I had to admit that as much as I wanted Toryn on this journey with us, I was glad he was one of the Mist Guard staying behind. He would keep Val and Nellie safe.