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I smiled. “We both know that’s not true.”

“Sadly, we do.”

“How much do I owe you?”

Ben backed away down the sidewalk, hands in the air. “This time? On the house.”

“Ben—”

“No arguments, Lena,” he called with a smile. “Just throw in some free coffee next time I’m in.”

He turned and jogged around the corner before I could insist on paying him for his work. “Thank you!”

I reached out and patted Bessie’s roof with my hand. She was a good car, no matter what anyone said. Especially now, it felt like she was the one constant in my life. I needed her.

The heaviness in my chest didn’t leave, and I knew it was because Jude hadn’t been the one to drop off the car. Every other time he’d helped me with Bessie, he’d been the one to pick her up and drop her off again. It was a sign, if ever I needed one.

How many little things I was used to and relied on were going to change now? Dread filled me at the thought. Because I was willing to bet there were far more than I realized.

I wrapped my arms around myself against the November chill. We were closing early today. I was going home to read the book and have the cup of tea I never ended up having last night, and I was going to do everything in my power not to think about Jude Williams.

Chapter 7

Jude

I dodged the punch aimed directly at my head and jumped away, throwing a missed punch of my own. Most of my sparring matches with Noah were missed hits. We knew each other too well and had for too long for either of us to land hits easily. But I was also sloppy. Days had passed since I’d last seen Lena, and I was slowly dying inside. At least, that’s what it felt like.

Daniel’s words about the nightmares were still ringing around in my head, as they had every time I’d woken since I’d heard them. With Noah, the questions were on the tip of my tongue, but I didn’t want to overstep.

Holding up a hand, I stopped to catch my breath. “Can I ask you something?”

Noah nodded, heading to the edge of the mat for a sip of water. “Sure.”

It wasn’t a secret on the ranch that Kate was staying with Noah. While they were both tangled up in this messy gang situation, it was the safest place for her to be. I’d seen the way he looked at her, and it was exactly the kind of look Daniel described. Like she was life itself.

“I’m not trying to pry. I have a different question, but this comes first.”

Noah raised an eyebrow. “Ominous, but okay.”

“You and Kate are together now?”

He froze, glancing at me nervously before easing up. “I—yes.”

“I’m not trying to bust your ass about it,” I told him. “I like Kate, and what she’s willing to do for her brother is great.”

His face shifted into a smirk at my hedging. “All right, I get it. What’s your real question?”

“Your nightmares.”

“Ah.” He looked at me. “Do I still have them?”

I shrugged. “More like, how are you dealing with them when you have someone in your bed? Are you afraid you’re going to hurt her? Or scare her away?”

He stared at me, and in that stare, I felt him see through the pretense of my question. There was no point in trying to act like I was asking for any reason other than Lena. “Please.”

“First, a caveat. My nightmares have never been as bad as yours. But I definitely had the thought, and I was concerned about it. However, recently, I was having more trouble falling asleep at all instead of waking up, so I think it was easier for me to let it happen.”

“And?”